DepravedFurball
Well-known member
True. I rescind my previous comments. Because I enjoy looking at beautiful young women.
Attracting More of What you Fear the Most (Negative Retail Experiences)
- Thread starter lonerism
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Kiwong
Well-known member
If I did that I'd be called a dirty old sleaze. I go out of my way not to look. Any form of attraction always led to ridicule, from high school through to university. I carry an uneasy bitterness about me, I will turn away to avoid any prospect of ridicule or to give even an indication of interest. I even heard one woman say "Don't dismiss me" when I didn't acknowledge her. Recently a lady looked at me and mumbled something, next time I saw her I said "Don't mumble at me, thank you." Next time I saw her, she said to a friend "He must be gay." The assumptions people make, After a lifetime of rejection I'm no longer available. A counsellor reckoned I'm repressed, oh well, tough.
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DepravedFurball
Well-known member
I just appreciate beauty in all it's forms. But even at 33, I'm starting to get some grey in the muzzle and temples... soon enough I'll be another 'dirty old man'. *le sigh*
DepravedFurball
Well-known member
Yes, well... 'Nature' has been around for billions of years. A gorgeous young woman is a certified miracle when compared to that. ^^
Would I hit on them or talk to them about inane things? Oh, Hell no. But just their presence is sometimes enough to elevate my mood.
Though the effect is ruined with the first generational 'lolwhutomfg' to come out of their mouths. >.< They don't even speak English anymore. Damned youth...
Would I hit on them or talk to them about inane things? Oh, Hell no. But just their presence is sometimes enough to elevate my mood.
Though the effect is ruined with the first generational 'lolwhutomfg' to come out of their mouths. >.< They don't even speak English anymore. Damned youth...
Kiwong
Well-known member
Why? Human beings are one of the least interesting and unattractive species on the planet.
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Holy bloody responses, Batman.
Alright, so... where to start...
Ah. The Self-Checkout. First and foremost, it's a cost-saving measure. The company doesn't have to pay out hourly wages, vacation, worry about sick time or shilling the till... within a year, a single machine more than pays for itself. And with a grouping of six to eight scanners, it can be watched over by a single newbie staffer. That's why they have them. Not to get customers out of the store faster or to reduce wait-times. It's purely a selfish desire by the company to screw honest people out of a job. I'd take a crowbar to every single one of them if I could, my own anxieties be damned...
Next up, hmm... oh, and you're right. If I had two or three items (I usually go for 6. It's a fun number.) then I'd hop right into the self-checkout, despite my previous crowbar-claim, merely because at 7am the WalMart employees are liable to ring my purchases up numerous times, or they'll find a problem with their system, forcing me to wait. Nuts to that. But if it's equally busy between the two exit-options, I'll take the normal express-line, simply because that's the one typically staffed by cute highschool girls. And yes, I feel terrible for thinking that they're cute... and if they want to ask me a couple more questions, then it's a few more seconds of testing my personal limits (and smiling at the previously-mentioned beautiful teenager).
From a security stand-point, a shopper in sweats and pull-overs signals 'I've got nothing to lose'. That's why you've got to force yourself to dress up a little. Just a bit. Blend in or try to be noticed as the person that's fashionably over-dressed. It can be difficult, I know, but people pay far less attention to a decently-clad person than someone that's shabby and might pose THEM a threat. The further you go to put others at ease, then the less they're going to hassle you.
Next up... you need to shop at different stores. I know that the ones you visit now you must consider a 'safer' place to shop... but that kind of treatment is absurd. If I got followed around once, I would chalk it up as them trying to meet a monthly quota... but repeated instances means that the owner of the store DOES NOT TRUST THEIR CUSTOMERS, so why the Hell should you give them your money? Screw them. They don't own your loyalty... unless they personally pulled you out of a burning building... which I highly doubt.
And the LPAs don't much talk to the employees. They follow their own whims, and are continually watching for people entering the store that they believe pose a threat to the bottom line.
Anyways, what I think it boils down to is a bunch of little factors coming together in such a way that it brings you a lot of attention. I wouldn't 100% blame the staff or anything, 'cause they're just sheep that are doing what their bosses tell them to, just so they can take home minimum wage. True, it sounds like they're targeting you... which means that they're either hyper-vigilant model employees, or they've been robbed so often that the owner is going bankrupt with all the losses.
At any rate, find new, perhaps quieter places to shop. There's bound to be a small deppaneure/corner store that greets you with a smile, and stocks a few of the items that you'd normally pick up. Or a small independent grocer that has non-Chinese-grown vegetables at a comparable price. Really, you've got to change things up, 'cause it's not gonna get better, and having to continually go through with this treatment is giving you far too many headaches. Other than, y'know, the normal stress-headaches we get whenever we shop.
Ahh - that makes sense re: the proliferation of the self-checkout machines. Sometimes it's easy to lose sight of the fact that stores constantly make their bottom-line the highest priority - though certain things may "trickle down" and benefit the customer.
I'm still struggling with your advice to "dress up" more - for various reasons. First of all - I thought that good LP work involved disregarding such superficial prejudices like how someone is dressed, and focusing on behavior. It's disturbing to me that this sound directive is being widely disregarded. And, "nothing to lose"?? I have plenty to lose! My integrity, my pride (since pride is so much more than just caring about how you look)....my clean record!!
Besides - I've seen my share of shabby-looking Loss Prevention people; from what I've seen, they can be the most poorly-dressed looking people in the store. I've seen them looking "blue-collar casual" to the point of looking out-of-place and conspicuous considering the area of town they were working in, the overall clientele, etc.. So is it fair to make insulting assumptions about their character because of the way they are dressed?
Also - as someone pointed out - many thieves are not dressed more poorly than average. And, I imagine that a great many are able to shoplift with far less anxiety than I am able to shop honestly.
And something tells me that LP officers are often more "in touch" with employees than they would want us to believe. For example - I've been in stores where I walk to an area that has no employee in sight...then, mere seconds later, an employee materializes out of nowhere to ask me if I need help. These employees seem to make a beeline for me; their body language suggests that they didn't just happen to "wander into the area", but rather - that they were told where to go. They could be in another section of the store entirely - but I suspect that they are told by LP about "that customer who is looking at merchandise in Aisle 1B".
I remember one time....an employee (who had assisted me previously) came back into my aisle and told me out-of-the-blue that I looked "confused". His comment baffled me - because - based on his location/positioning during the previous minutes...it was really unlikely that he could have observed me long enough to determine that I looked "confused". I strongly suspect that some other employee (who could have been LP) had been observing me that whole time - and had told this employee that I looked confused. In fact - this employee who had told me that I was "confused" was wearing an earpiece - which helped convince me that someone else was watching me and was communicating with this man via his earpiece. Actually, I may have spotted this other employee; I noticed an employee positioned halfway across the store - at a far enough distance that he may have thought that I didn't notice him - but in an area where it appeared that he had a decent line-of-sight to where I was looking at merchandise. He just sat there the whole time, facing my direction.
Okay - I said that I was going to give some examples of the kinds of things that constantly happen to me. Here is one of the stranger, more egregious incidents:
While walking down the aisle of a grocery store, I came across an item that I wanted to buy - those aluminum pans that people use to bake pies in (if you buy a pie in the bakery section - chances are that the pie will be sitting in one of these pans). These aluminum pans were sold in packs of three; I selected two of these packs. Without thinking much about it, I stacked these packs together - so that these two packs now appeared to be one bigger pack. I then placed this "mega-pack" in my shopping cart. I guess I stacked the packs together to conserve space in my grocery cart; it made more practical sense to stack them in this fashion rather than to have two separate packs taking up space. These pans are so easy to stack in this fashion; the way these pans are built seems to naturally invite such stacking. I did NOT do this because I wanted to steal one of the packs. I wasn't thinking at all about such matters - and I wasn't thinking of the possibility that I might forget to separate these packs when it came time to scan them at the self check-out. Like I said, I really wasn't thinking much at all when I stacked the pans - I did it somewhat absent-mindedly.
Well - fast-forward to check-out time; as I often do, I opted to use a self-checkout machine. I had many items, relatively-speaking - probably well over 20 items. Well, at some point in the middle of my scanning all of my items, I picked up the "mega-pack" of aluminum pans. Completely forgetting that I had actually selected two packs, I scanned the one mega-pack and put it in a grocery bag. It was an innocent mistake. I rarely make such a mistake - but I did this time.
Several seconds after I scanned the pack of aluminum pans, the employee who was "presiding" over the self-checkout area approached me and pointed out that I had two packs of aluminum pans - but only scanned one of them. After a moment of confusion, I then remembered. I took the pans out of the bag, separated the packs, and scanned the pack of pans that I had forgotten about.
What is so exceptional - and so disturbing - about this moment is how the employee was in a position to catch my gaffe. Someone had to have been watching me very closely - whether it was this employee, or someone else. Somehow, I think this employee had assistance in spotting my omission - it's somewhat unlikely that this employee spotted this type of thing with her naked eye. Those thin pans can stack on top of each other pretty well - and I just don't see the employee looking into my cart full of items and noticing, "Oh - those are two packs that she stacked on top of one another."
It's very possible that someone was watching me when I selected and stacked those pans in that aisle - possibly on CCTV. Someone kept track of that one brief moment...and if they were watching me during that moment, it's likely that they were watching me for longer than that moment. They later watched me as I scanned the pans (and was carefully watching the list of items that showed up in the computer system as I scanned). The employee who was manning the self-checkout area was alerted in some way of the discrepancy - perhaps a message appeared on the computer she was looking at.
It was disturbing to me how quickly my error was caught and addressed; not because I was trying to steal the pans, but because it was high-level evidence that I was being closely watched. It was clear evidence that I was the subject of an organized, coordinated effort - something that I have often been able to sense, anyway.
While walking down the aisle of a grocery store, I came across an item that I wanted to buy - those aluminum pans that people use to bake pies in (if you buy a pie in the bakery section - chances are that the pie will be sitting in one of these pans). These aluminum pans were sold in packs of three; I selected two of these packs. Without thinking much about it, I stacked these packs together - so that these two packs now appeared to be one bigger pack. I then placed this "mega-pack" in my shopping cart. I guess I stacked the packs together to conserve space in my grocery cart; it made more practical sense to stack them in this fashion rather than to have two separate packs taking up space. These pans are so easy to stack in this fashion; the way these pans are built seems to naturally invite such stacking. I did NOT do this because I wanted to steal one of the packs. I wasn't thinking at all about such matters - and I wasn't thinking of the possibility that I might forget to separate these packs when it came time to scan them at the self check-out. Like I said, I really wasn't thinking much at all when I stacked the pans - I did it somewhat absent-mindedly.
Well - fast-forward to check-out time; as I often do, I opted to use a self-checkout machine. I had many items, relatively-speaking - probably well over 20 items. Well, at some point in the middle of my scanning all of my items, I picked up the "mega-pack" of aluminum pans. Completely forgetting that I had actually selected two packs, I scanned the one mega-pack and put it in a grocery bag. It was an innocent mistake. I rarely make such a mistake - but I did this time.
Several seconds after I scanned the pack of aluminum pans, the employee who was "presiding" over the self-checkout area approached me and pointed out that I had two packs of aluminum pans - but only scanned one of them. After a moment of confusion, I then remembered. I took the pans out of the bag, separated the packs, and scanned the pack of pans that I had forgotten about.
What is so exceptional - and so disturbing - about this moment is how the employee was in a position to catch my gaffe. Someone had to have been watching me very closely - whether it was this employee, or someone else. Somehow, I think this employee had assistance in spotting my omission - it's somewhat unlikely that this employee spotted this type of thing with her naked eye. Those thin pans can stack on top of each other pretty well - and I just don't see the employee looking into my cart full of items and noticing, "Oh - those are two packs that she stacked on top of one another."
It's very possible that someone was watching me when I selected and stacked those pans in that aisle - possibly on CCTV. Someone kept track of that one brief moment...and if they were watching me during that moment, it's likely that they were watching me for longer than that moment. They later watched me as I scanned the pans (and was carefully watching the list of items that showed up in the computer system as I scanned). The employee who was manning the self-checkout area was alerted in some way of the discrepancy - perhaps a message appeared on the computer she was looking at.
It was disturbing to me how quickly my error was caught and addressed; not because I was trying to steal the pans, but because it was high-level evidence that I was being closely watched. It was clear evidence that I was the subject of an organized, coordinated effort - something that I have often been able to sense, anyway.
Oh - and something else happened during this same grocery-store visit (see above) that had a disturbing ring to it. After the aluminum-pan issue was taken care of, and I had finished up my transaction - I left the store and loaded the groceries into my car. After doing so, I sat in my car for a few minutes - checking off my grocery list and figuring out what items I still needed to buy from other stores (I sometimes shop at two or more grocery stores during a 2-3 hour span.). As I was doing so, the same employee who had been supervising the self-checkout area came out of the store with a bag in her hand. I looked up to notice that she was headed toward my car with this bag. As it turns out - I had absent-mindedly left behind one of my bags of groceries. (My heightened anxiety over the aluminium-pan situation probably played a role in my overlooking an entire bag of groceries that I had paid for.) This employee was "kind enough" to bring this bag of groceries to my car.
While I was quite thankful for this gesture (especially since this bag contained some of my highest-priced groceries!) - I was again disturbed by aspects of this situation. It seems that this employee walked out of the store and knew exactly what car to walk to - in a parking-lot full of cars! I happened to look up from my grocery-list soon enough to catch her shortly after she had exited the store - so I know that she didn't seem to struggle at all to locate me. It appeared that she basically knew exactly where to go - and she seemed to know that I would still be there. (If I didn't have to review my grocery-list, I would have been gone by then.)
Am I "over-thinking" to think that she was told where she could find me in the parking lot - or was it simple luck that she found me with ease? At the very least, she clearly knew that it was my bag - and it seems that she seemed to know a lot more than that. And if she knew what I think she knew - how did she find out this information? Was her "intelligence" a byproduct of prior surveillance?
I hate that I wasn't quick-thinking enough to ask her how she located me so easily (social-anxiety really has a way of slowing the wit).
While I was quite thankful for this gesture (especially since this bag contained some of my highest-priced groceries!) - I was again disturbed by aspects of this situation. It seems that this employee walked out of the store and knew exactly what car to walk to - in a parking-lot full of cars! I happened to look up from my grocery-list soon enough to catch her shortly after she had exited the store - so I know that she didn't seem to struggle at all to locate me. It appeared that she basically knew exactly where to go - and she seemed to know that I would still be there. (If I didn't have to review my grocery-list, I would have been gone by then.)
Am I "over-thinking" to think that she was told where she could find me in the parking lot - or was it simple luck that she found me with ease? At the very least, she clearly knew that it was my bag - and it seems that she seemed to know a lot more than that. And if she knew what I think she knew - how did she find out this information? Was her "intelligence" a byproduct of prior surveillance?
I hate that I wasn't quick-thinking enough to ask her how she located me so easily (social-anxiety really has a way of slowing the wit).
I am troubled about how the first half of this article is written. The author presents it as an ironclad fact that everyone who catches employees' attention in certain "negative" ways is a shoplifter. If you spot a "shoplifter" before they shoplift - are you sure that you can call them a shoplifter? What true evidence do you have that they are in fact a shoplifter - when they didn't actually commit the act? It's delusional to present this idea that you can anticipate what someone is going to do with 100% accuracy.
Unless you know a person's criminal history or shoplifting record - it's way too reckless to call them a "shoplifter" just for walking into a store and displaying behaviors that are considered suspicious. That person just may have the bad luck of acting similarly to how some shoplifters may act - through no real fault of their own.
I do like the fact that the author wrote this toward the end: "Although saying hello and keeping an extra eye on suspicious behavior is critical, it's important to understand that not all suspicious behavior is a sign of a potential problem. Some customers are just nervous people who are awkward in public places, and being a pedestrian who needs to carry baggage with them is not a crime." However, this may get lost in the harsh undertones of the first part of the article.
How to Spot a Shoplifter - Yahoo Voices - voices.yahoo.com
Unless you know a person's criminal history or shoplifting record - it's way too reckless to call them a "shoplifter" just for walking into a store and displaying behaviors that are considered suspicious. That person just may have the bad luck of acting similarly to how some shoplifters may act - through no real fault of their own.
I do like the fact that the author wrote this toward the end: "Although saying hello and keeping an extra eye on suspicious behavior is critical, it's important to understand that not all suspicious behavior is a sign of a potential problem. Some customers are just nervous people who are awkward in public places, and being a pedestrian who needs to carry baggage with them is not a crime." However, this may get lost in the harsh undertones of the first part of the article.
How to Spot a Shoplifter - Yahoo Voices - voices.yahoo.com