Are you afraid of members of the opposite sex liking you?

mndigi

mndigi

Well-known member
I am a guy, and maybe I look a little cute or maybe I look like a goof. But the thing is, sometimes when I am out, I find girls and women looking at me. I don't know whether they find me cute or are looking at me as a spectacle. But I assume the former (have done so since 18 before which I used to assume the latter for everyone lol) and it makes me feel good.

But when it's time to go out again, I feel anxious and apprehensive about being looked at again by girls. So I like it and I am afraid of it at the same time. I want to ask if there are others who face something like this?

I think I am afraid because I worry that I will fail somehow and appear unattractive to girls this time. Maybe I want to preserve all of what happened the first time and I am afraid of losing it.
 
GammaRay

GammaRay

Member
Me as well. I just don't know how to react at all. It's a between a strange form of happiness and feeling like there's some kind of mistake....especially if their really attractive.... people tell me I am, but I allways sort of pass it off as politeness
 
this_portrait

this_portrait

Well-known member
I feel the same way, but one thing I've noticed about myself is that, when I walk around in public, I throw up my guard. So I'll get a lot of stares from different guys in a bunch of different age groups, but hardly any will ever come up and talk to me, and the few who do make fools out of themselves. An aunt of mine says it's because I look intimidating. I used to disagree, but now I can't help but agree.
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
sleepysparrow said:
male/female, it's all the same to me.
Click to expand...

Yeah same here. I have a barrier which stops me people from getting close to me. As soon as there's a danger that a friendship is going to form i shy away. My low self esteem won't allow me to get close to anyone.
 
M

mikestar

Banned
alot of girls I see walk past and start giggling to each other,is that good sign or not I still dont understand females. Also when I pass a girl by herself,she starts looking at the floor and beings to smile/giggle goes a bit red to

I wish more would pay more attention to me so no im not afraid
 
W

WelshOne

Well-known member
I dont really know if girls look at me, but I doubt it. I almost always avoid eye contact, or even avoid looking at all sometimes unless I can do so without chance that they might see me looking at them. I guess I feel inferior and that I have no right to look at them, or that they will think something along the lines of "FFS why is he looking at me?"

I do want girls to look at me in some ways, because I want to be accepted and liked, but I also get really nervous because if theyre looking at me they might want to come over and talk to me. And if they came to talk to me I'd make a right fool of myself because of my lack of experience with girls and my anxiety. Not to mention my mind goes blank of any fricken thing to say AT ALL!

When I start college in September Im going to try really hard to talk to people though, maybe even girls (so long as Im not attracted to them!)
 
Cynic

Cynic

Well-known member
recluse said:
Yeah same here. I have a barrier which stops me people from getting close to me. As soon as there's a danger that a friendship is going to form i shy away. My low self esteem won't allow me to get close to anyone.
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The same is true of me too.
 
F

FOR REAL

Banned
i understand 100(wheres the percent button!)
its like you dont know why they are looking at you.
do they think your good looking or do they think something else.
when im out (if i get out) i just look at the ground where im walking, no eye contact with anyone
 
IntriguedOneM

IntriguedOneM

Member
I have a hard time when I feel like a girl might be looking at me in anyway. It's a feeling like she might think that I am attractive now but once she hears me talk in front of others or interact with others, she will realize how boring I am and not want to talk to me and will see me for whom I really am. whatever that is!
 
TooShyShy

TooShyShy

Well-known member
You'd think getting positive attention would be a good thing, and if you liked her or felt she was attractive that it would help you and your self esteem and possibly get you an opportunity with her or others...i am baffled :O
 
BlackKids

BlackKids

Well-known member
sleepysparrow said:
male/female, it's all the same to me.
Click to expand...

Bisexual ?
But seriously I assume you have a b/f / married so therefore once you have that you don't look at people the same way.
I find it difficult if I think someones attracted to me. Like most people said my self esteem is so low that I never think thats possible.
 
mndigi

mndigi

Well-known member
I used to walk with my head down and not look at girls. I think that time was the most wasted time in my life. Any way, I very much doubt that girls find me attractive but I am happy enough making my own stories that they do.
 
dead24

dead24

Well-known member
IntriguedOneM said:
I have a hard time when I feel like a girl might be looking at me in anyway. It's a feeling like she might think that I am attractive now but once she hears me talk in front of others or interact with others, she will realize how boring I am and not want to talk to me and will see me for whom I really am. whatever that is!
Click to expand...

exactly the same here
 
Danfalc

Danfalc

Banned
Not really,I find it very hard to believe a girl could like me in that way anyway,but friendship wise i prefer females..I just seem to click easier with girls than guys and feel more secure around them.
 
DASwife

DASwife

Well-known member
Ugh, I get nervous and scared. My husband says I just come off as really intimidating and uninterested which sucks because then guys work harder to get my attention and I'm just FREAKING out inside.

I find it a lot easier to hit on girls. Maybe its because I'm more in control of the situation...I just hate HATE hate getting hit on. Ugh.
 
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