I think I may have a phobia.
I was brought up Christian, and somewhere along the line a developed view in my head that "breasts" should not be on view. This was not passed on from parents, of pastors. It was my own reasoning. I felt they should be private.
Around 10 years ago I started noticing that I noticed breast more. It was in a time of stress, and it settle.
But around six months ago, through a time of major stress at work and home, something seemed to break. I had a real fear of looking at breasts. I would meet up with a female an my first thoughts where "don't look". Because I was thinking this, the conversation was hard to focus. I was feel uneasy, and feel that I was looking. At times I would feel that the girl, was responding. Either to my unease, or to my glancing down.
It started only with girls with low tops, or flesh exposed, and developed to literally any definition. I feel I make them feel uneasy.
At one point I felt I had two options, 1) blind myself 2) die.
I have a beautiful wife and three kids which keep me going. My wife knows all about this. At times this seems so stupid, and how could it even be an issue. Other times, I am anxious to even meet people. I can stand in front of 1000 people and give a talk, but put me fast to face with a lady with a slightly exposed chest, and it's like facing a spider.
It not attraction. I don't even get that luxury. It just pure anxiety, that I will look and, she will notice, and think less of me.
I had noticed the same thing before when I met someone with a face injury and I felt the same. The compulsion to look, when everything said don't.
Has anyone had similar,
Did you get specific professional help!
What do you advise?
I was brought up Christian, and somewhere along the line a developed view in my head that "breasts" should not be on view. This was not passed on from parents, of pastors. It was my own reasoning. I felt they should be private.
Around 10 years ago I started noticing that I noticed breast more. It was in a time of stress, and it settle.
But around six months ago, through a time of major stress at work and home, something seemed to break. I had a real fear of looking at breasts. I would meet up with a female an my first thoughts where "don't look". Because I was thinking this, the conversation was hard to focus. I was feel uneasy, and feel that I was looking. At times I would feel that the girl, was responding. Either to my unease, or to my glancing down.
It started only with girls with low tops, or flesh exposed, and developed to literally any definition. I feel I make them feel uneasy.
At one point I felt I had two options, 1) blind myself 2) die.
I have a beautiful wife and three kids which keep me going. My wife knows all about this. At times this seems so stupid, and how could it even be an issue. Other times, I am anxious to even meet people. I can stand in front of 1000 people and give a talk, but put me fast to face with a lady with a slightly exposed chest, and it's like facing a spider.
It not attraction. I don't even get that luxury. It just pure anxiety, that I will look and, she will notice, and think less of me.
I had noticed the same thing before when I met someone with a face injury and I felt the same. The compulsion to look, when everything said don't.
Has anyone had similar,
Did you get specific professional help!
What do you advise?