Am I heartless

dannyboy65

dannyboy65

Well-known member
Well recently where I live there was a fire. I think as many as 9 or so young boys died. Everyone on my facebook is sad about it and everyone I know is trying to be there for the families. I don't know I just don't feel sympathy for them and I am being blunt but I just don't feel like its my problem. Like I have people on my facebook posting non stop about it and I just want to tell them to stop. Most of them don't even know the people and their balling their eyes out. I don't understand it at all, are they looking for attention?
 
EasySkanking

EasySkanking

1
Lol... I remember feeling like this. No, they're not looking for attention (maybe some are) but most genuinely feel empathy for their fellow human being.

No you're not heartless, but just don't tell them to "stop", it won't be pretty :)
 
outofthisworld

outofthisworld

Well-known member
I don't think you are heartless,, sometime people don't feel anything for others because they are not family or never met them, it's like when you watch something on the news it's so "normal" that it doesn't make people sad. but people that over do on facebook I think are either looking for attention or are just sheeps
 
dannyboy65

dannyboy65

Well-known member
It's really annoying like I know the girl and if anything bad happens she goes on and does all this stuff acting like she knew them and she balls her eyes out for people she doesn't even know.
 
J

jaim38

Well-known member
No, I don't think you're heartless. Some people cry for just about anyone because they empathize so much for others. They allow themselves to get carried away with their emotions. But people in certain professions such as doctors and police officers must be good at maintaining emotional stability during tough times in order to think logically and act decisively. Not crying is ok - I bet many people find it hard to cry. But laughing at tragedies - that's another thing.
 
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BlueWeepingRose

Well-known member
No I don't think you're heartless at all. I often times hear horrible stories myself and not sure how to react whenever I hear them. Everyone reacts differently when they hear certain events happening. When something tragic happens with one of my family members: I usually keep to myself and stay quiet.
 
L

Lavinialuna

Well-known member
It is a matter of empathy, if you can identify with the victims or not. If you can place yourself in their shoes. You are pretty young and have no children of your own, so it stands to reason that you may not understand what it would feel like to love a child so deeply, or to lose someone so innocent and how senseless it is. Maybe you have never felt what it is like to lose someone close to you? If not, you may not understand the depth of their suffering. Until you live it, you can never understand.
That being said, it is normal for you to not be able to understand their pain and in reality, it isn't your pain to feel, so don't feel bad about it... However, those who are upset by it are only trying to honor these children who died, and are expressing their grief... not seeking attention, but rather comfort from other like minded people. Have patience for them. If it bothers you, hide the posts for awhile.
I personally feel empathy for others very deeply and painfully, not sure if it's a gift or a curse, but it's real. Don't be mean to others for feeling what you can't :)
 
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dannyboy65

dannyboy65

Well-known member
Lavinialuna said:
It is a matter of empathy, if you can identify with the victims or not. If you can place yourself in their shoes. You are pretty young and have no children of your own, so it stands to reason that you may not understand what it would feel like to love a child so deeply, or to lose someone so innocent and how senseless it is. Maybe you have never felt what it is like to lose someone close to you? If not, you may not understand the depth of their suffering. Until you live it, you can never understand.
That being said, it is normal for you to not be able to understand their pain and in reality, it isn't your pain to feel, so don't feel bad about it... However, those who are upset by it are only trying to honor these children who died, and are expressing their grief... not seeking attention, but rather comfort from other like minded people. Have patience for them. If it bothers you, hide the posts for awhile.
I personally feel empathy for others very deeply and painfully, not sure if it's a gift or a curse, but it's real. Don't be mean to others for feeling what you can't :)
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No I'm not being mean, its just this girl likes to cause drama and she didn't even really know the kids till they died and she acts like she knows them. It's ok to express yourself but if its the only thing you talk about non stop it gets annoying. I want to hear better things then death. It's just really hard to know these things. I have lost one person who meant the world to me, she was my cousin and we were best friends we always saw each other. She was diagnosed with cancer at 7 years old 2 years later it took her life away. I am still depressed to this day from that so I do understand the pain. It's just I don't know why someone would say they knew the people just to get attention.
 
J

jc972

1
She sounds like a drama queen. Seen that before. But still, my heart goes out to those poor kids and their families.
 
dannyboy65

dannyboy65

Well-known member
jc972 said:
She sounds like a drama queen. Seen that before. But still, my heart goes out to those poor kids and their families.
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Exactly, it was sad that those families had to go through all of that. Her going and saying all this stuff and trying to get all of the attention from the ones that are hurting, is not making the situation easier for the families.
 
J

jc972

1
dannyboy65 said:
Exactly, it was sad that those families had to go through all of that. Her going and saying all this stuff and trying to get all of the attention from the ones that are hurting, is not making the situation easier for the families.
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Nope it won't. When i was in junior high my girlfriend died and people she didn't even know were squalling and crying all over themselves and it made me sick. People do this all the time and its wrong but they still do it.
 
Entangled

Entangled

Well-known member
Stay off Facebook for a few days. You're not heartless. For me I really don't care too much about people I don't know, because I know that they feel the same way about me. It's like the obituaries in the paper unless you actually KNOW the people who died you will most likely just briefly scan or just skip that part of the paper, because it does not affect you, and that is ok.

Death is tragic but it's how life works, you can be here one day and gone the next
 
dannyboy65

dannyboy65

Well-known member
jc972 said:
Nope it won't. When i was in junior high my girlfriend died and people she didn't even know were squalling and crying all over themselves and it made me sick. People do this all the time and its wrong but they still do it.
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I know! I want to tell her to stop, but I just can't I don't want to hurt her feelings. My friend just told me to tell her to change the subject, I can't even do that.
 
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