*deep inhalation*
Cause:
Well, I was 'normal' I may have been anxious but I functioned normally, just a normal teenager really. Then there was an incident when I was 19 and I suffered from a post traumatic stress disorder. If I had to go out, I couldn't get in a taxi, bus, car, train, aeroplane. So I walked everywhere which sometimes took me 5 or 6 hours to get where I was going. I counted people. I knew where everybody in a room was and exactly what they were doing, I was like a pigeon looking around, twitching, watching, guarded. That phase went on years. I don't know how I functioned. I fainted a lot under the stress, when I had to work it was a nightmare. On my first day in a new job after the incident (a year or so after) I was so freaked out I kept fainting. I fainted over 8 times in a row and had to be rushed to hospital.
Duration:
First I had the initial stage of PTSD and then after a long time that became agoraphobia and I did calm over the years and become less jumpy and more relaxed but I also stopped going out over periods of time. For a few years I went out but in a very limited capacity to work...to the shop...home. My agoraphobia is ongoing. I'm vastly improved but I keep and eye on it so I don't relapse. I'm pretty much 'normal' in my life now. So far it's been 9 years I've had it. Im at the point now where I wouldn't go abroad but I will travel nationwide, day trips, car journeys, train journeys, go to restaurants, pubs, nightclubs, other peoples houses, boyfriends parents house,college, gymclasses. More or less unlimited, sometimes I like to know in advance and prepare myself but I'm pretty flexible.
What solved it for me:...
The realisation that I really did want to live a life. And that came for me in the form of a serious illness. I developed an autoimmune disease. After years of immune suppression and very serious drugs, they decided to try send me to a psychologist to help me deal with being ill. (I was so insulted and defensive about being sent there) But my symptoms massively reduced after I started talking to her. I havent been an inpatient in hospital since October 2011 so it kinda worked. There is a link between mental health and immune response. They use me as a case study in the hospital. They think that the stress I was under was the direct cause of my condition. They say that they are seeing incidences like mine more and more frequently.
How long to fix it:
Em, since I joined this site I've been working hard to try and sort myself out.
Psychologist every week
Group therapy sessions over 12 weeks
Major lifestyle changes...the list is endless, check out myjournal for details.
I've kept a journal here for a year and a half.
http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/diary-of-a-closet-agoraphobe-35486/ Prior to that I was mildly functioning for a few years and before that not at all.
Its not like thuis for everyone, each person is different.
If you think you feel effected by anything I talk about, maybe a good idea to talk to your g.p. nothing is insurmountable. You can get better!!!
*Exhale* phew