No one is complaining Sully. We're discussing our problems. You gave advice, we disagree, move on! You're not a doctor or psychologist. I'll take their diagnosis before yours. And that diagnosis was SA, OCD and Depression. I'm now taking medication as I was prescribed.
The definition of complain is as follows: to express grief, pain or discontent. That is all I see in your posts.
You're right, I'm not a doctor or a psychologist. I don't benefit from the fact that you are suffering. You don't pay me to tell you that you are chemically, socially and psychologically different from your peers and I certainly don't receive proceeds to prescribe you SSRI's whose side effects can result in even worse depression and anxiety, suicidal and/or homicidal thoughts and many others. If I was one though it sure would suck if I actually helped you and you overcame your issues because then I wouldn't get paid! I have however, experienced the exact same feelings as thoughts as you have and I have improved enormously. You don't think I was as bad as you are regarding social anxiety? How bout I share a bit of my story and we will see.
I grew up getting beat physically and abused verbally on a daily basis. If I chewed to loud I would get reprimanded and criticized verbally. If I didn't act the way I was expected to act on a daily basis I would get my ass beat by my brother. I learned from a very early age that I was worthless.
When I was 11 years old I drank alcohol for the first time and I loved it because all my anxiety issues disappeared. 3 years later I smoked pot for the first time. In high school I didn't have many friends and the ones I did have were misfits. My drinking continually increased and it felt good at social gatherings because like I said my anxiety disappeared and everything was good. My senior year I was getting drunk and high every day, when my friends couldnt hang out, I started drinking alone in my room. When I went to college I wanted to rush a fraternity because of the drinking culture but was too afraid of being rejected. So I resorted to drinking alone most of the time. I got to the point where I would get drunk every night alone in my room. I would sleep all day except when I would leave to go get some fast food for my hangover and after eating it I would go back to bed. I gained 60 lbs in college. One day I decided alcohol wasn't good enough and started taking oxycontin. Oxycontin was so much nicer because my anxiety disappeared and there was no hangover involved. When I was hooked on OC and couldn't find any to buy, I would resort to smoking heroin. My excuse for doing this was because of my social anxiety and depression and towards the end I thought about killing myself daily. Then I went to rehab and maintained that I was different and relapsed immediately. Sex life? NONE. I lost my virginity to a hooker in the red light district of Amsterdam. Finally I went to another rehab and found that there are other ways of looking at life that don't involve limiting myself by saying I have social anxiety.
I have been sober for 27 months. Before I went to rehab I was living in the basement of my parents house and only leaving to buy drugs and/or alcohol. Today I am living in Spain and TEACH ENGLISH. That means I stand in front of a classroom of students all day where the attention is on me for 50 minutes at a time. I set aside my self doubt daily to communicate in spanish which is not my native language but is necessary to know in the little town of Galicia, Spain that I live in. I am happy and I have developed some great friendships and even found a girlfriend. I am free and I dont limit myself by hiding behind a label of social anxiety like I used to on a daily basis.
Your screen name is I'm not my illness but after this conversation I can safely say that you think you are your illness. You will go to any lengths to defend the fact that you are chemically and psychologically different than anyone else and you lash out at anyone that tells you otherwise. You label these things as problems which makes me believe you dont like them yet you are unwilling to consider other viewpoints because you define yourself by your social anxiety. You get offended if someone tells you that it isnt that bad because you truly believe it is a part of you. I understand, I've been there and it is difficult.
You may not agree with me and that is fine, I am not saying you should. This forum is not yours however and maybe others will benefit from what I am sharing. If not, I will continue to share my truth because it is my right as a fellow sufferer of Social Phobia.
I wish you the best.
