Paying for affection??

OceanMist

Well-known member
It's the not the sex that you want, it's the acceptance that you yearn for. Everybody desires acceptance, and a lot of us folks don't get enough of it.

You'd be better off doing online dating and getting to a know a woman in real life dates a bit before having sex.

You want realness, not a "service."

Your counselor is kind of right. You shouldn't desire love so much that it becomes a hinderance on you.

Love isn't a need, it's something that happens when someone meets the right person for them.
 

gustavofring

Well-known member
Just go for it.

Is it really that big of a deal? At the worst you'll lose a bit of money, and one day look back and laugh at it or feel slightly ashamed.

Human physical contact is a very basic need and I understand fully if you've been deprived of such a thing your whole life that you've reached a point where you consider doing this. Just for a few hours, feeling safe, feeling loved. Yes, it's fake to a degree, but don't beat yourself up over it.

People also go to massage salons or other services that make them feel good. Why should a hugging service be any different?
 
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truffleshuffle

Well-known member
It's the not the sex that you want, it's the acceptance that you yearn for. Everybody desires acceptance, and a lot of us folks don't get enough of it.

You'd be better off doing online dating and getting to a know a woman in real life dates a bit before having sex.

You want realness, not a "service."

Your counselor is kind of right. You shouldn't desire love so much that it becomes a hinderance on you.

Love isn't a need, it's something that happens when someone meets the right person for them.
From what i have read and been told he is not wanting sex. Just contact like being hugged and haing his hand held and thigs like that. Although I would never do that I think he may need to or he will never have the courage to find someone to date because of the fact he will have all the pain of not being hugged or anything hanging over his head.
 

R3K

Well-known member
i was in this exact cunundrum up until 2010 (i was 30 y/o then.) i could go into details about my whole ordeal, but instead i'm just going to sum up my conclusions and advice for you. it's a simple process, and it's working marvelously for me:

1. figure out your appearance style and begin dressing your clothes, hair, cologne etc-to amplify it. Shave everyday with a real razor, even if you're just sitting at home doing nothing by yourself. wash/clean your car and your room regularly. basically act like you're gonna go on a date every damn day. keep a condom in your wallet.

2. go to a night club where there's lots of dancing. if you don't know how to dance, all you have to do is hold a beer in your hand and stand at the edge of the dance floor and bob your head to the music. watch the girls dancing.

3. repeat this procedure until you meet a girl.

X. the point of all this is confidence. if you look good, you feel good. if you feel good, you're confidence goes up. girls sense this **** in guys and they're automatically attracted to them. you don't need to go pay for escort girls or w/e it is you're thinking of doing, you need to cultivate a sense of swag and suavetè that you can employ in any situation like it was second nature.
 

razzle dazzle rose

Well-known member
I understand why you'd seek out such a service. I wouldn't judge you for it. I also say go for it. And if you don't already have a pet, I would recommend you get one if possible. My cats give me so much affection I don't know what I would do without them.
 

gazelle

Well-known member
Remember what I'm asking for is not really sexual at all so maybe it would be possible to find someone who wasn't a sex worker to pay for it? However this problem with telling real people the truth is what drives me to want to either pay for it. You can have correspondence before hand and let me know the extent of your issues. However if anyone has any alternative idea for finding affection please continue to suggest it.

To be honest, considering the things you've mentioned about your mom, I wouldn't blame you for feeling the way you do.Though it still seems unclear whether what you're craving for is romance or just human affection. If it's the later, have you ever considered activities like participating in charity work that involve doing work where you're directly in contact with the poeple you're helping? Sometimes a genuine smile or thank you from the bottom of a person's heart that you've helped can be more fulfilling than any physical stimulation and at the same time give you an ego boost.
 
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