When was the last time you felt left out

KiaKaha

Banned
I just found out that a whole group of people from my one of my classes when I studied got together to catch up recently. I never really fit in but I was still part of the group, and now I just feel stupid because I feel left out. An all too common occurence for me.

Anyone else care to share..?
 

Agent_Violet

Well-known member
If my husband takes our employees out to lunch and I can't go or if I didn't come in that day.
If the girls from my office go to a movie and don't invite me
If my mom goes somewhere fun and doesn't invite me

I feel left out a lot. I even feel left out online. ugh. I don't like admitting these things! lol
 

KiaKaha

Banned
Sorry I didn't mean to make anyone feel bad, empathy just makes me feel better...in a selfish parasitic kind of way.. I was just reading an article on a kids health website about cliques.. its a real self esteem killer...especially at a young age.
 

Dead_on_Arrival

Well-known member
I don't think I was ever let in. I know that sounds dramatic and overreacting to emotion but I can't think of a time when I felt accepted other than my wedding and when I'm with my family (wife, son and daughter only that is).
 
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Agent_Violet

Well-known member
Sorry I didn't mean to make anyone feel bad, empathy just makes me feel better...in a selfish parasitic kind of way.. I was just reading an article on a kids health website about cliques.. its a real self esteem killer...especially at a young age.

You don't have to apologize...i think it's good to admit things about ourselves that make us uncomfortable. it's like therapy:)

i feel terrible for kids today when it comes to the social cliques. I mean, there have always been cliques but it seems worse today than it used to be:(
 

KiaKaha

Banned
I don't think I was ever let in. I know that sounds dramatic and overreacting to emotion but I can't think of a time when I felt accepted other than my wedding and when I'm with my family (wife and daughter only that is).

Yeah, but at least you have people who accept and love you, which is a hard enough find anyway. I guess everyone feels left out some times...and it makes you feel crap.. which why I try to be nice to everyone (even though admittedly sometimes I am not)
 

KiaKaha

Banned
You don't have to apologize...i think it's good to admit things about ourselves that make us uncomfortable. it's like therapy:)

i feel terrible for kids today when it comes to the social cliques. I mean, there have always been cliques but it seems worse today than it used to be:(

For sure. It is pretty heart breaking seeing a kid with no friends or who is constantly bullied. Exclusion sends a very clear and deep message to a child.

Anyway, I actually feel better... screw them. I would rather read a book anyway :D
 
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userremoved

Guest
I got left out of stuff quite a bit my first semester in college, which was a major cause of my depression that year. Even when I asked people to let me know when they were doing something, they would say they had nothing going on, then I would later see them on facebook doing things with each other. Now I just dont even bother trying anymore. **** all of them
 

Agent_Violet

Well-known member
books are the best:)

my son is an avid reader. he gets picked on a lot in school. He's such a sensitive little boy...he cares about everyone and wants everyone to feel happy...the bullies really tend to focus their aggression on kids like him.

kids that get excluded at school really need to have a strong support network at home. my son knows that I believe he's the coolest boy in the world ;)
 
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userremoved

Guest
books are the best:)

my son is an avid reader. he gets picked on a lot in school. He's such a sensitive little boy...he cares about everyone and wants everyone to feel happy...the bullies really tend to focus their aggression on kids like him.

kids that get excluded at school really need to have a strong support network at home. my son knows that I believe he's the coolest boy in the world ;)

He sounds like me as a kid....
 
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Beatrice

Guest
Yeah, at community college last year I had a biology lab, and we formed groups. At first it was all fine and dandy, we all talked. But before long, they had slowly begun to ignore me and pushed me to the outside of the group.

I fought to get back in, but they just looked at me like, "Oh, are you talking again?" I'm sure you know the look I mean.....

I will mention though, it WAS a group of all boys. I was the only girl. That may have had something to do with it.....
 

lilmutegirl

Well-known member
I feel left out a lot. It is particularly hard for me at work. We have 8 women who work together, and (with the exception of one girl), we all get along very well. I find it annoying (both personally and professionally) when there are 3 or more of us working together and the other two are chatting while I work. I have found myself butting into conversations and following people around like a lost puppy trying to be involved, which I think makes me look pathetic.
I also often hear about friends going out without me, but it doesn't always bother me, because odds are, they are doing something I don't necessarily want to do. Besides, if it's only a couple of people, I don't feel too bad, since there are times I go out with another person and not include others.
In high school, one of my exes made a diagram of all the cliques in our school. He described me as a "floater", meaning that I didn't affiliate with one particular group, but could fit in anywhere. The flexibility could be a good thing, but I also missed out on a lot of inside jokes and group activities. I have come to realize (since I still hang out with 2 friends from high school who hung out with different groups in h.s.) how much I have actually missed, and it makes me sad.
Sorry...that was a lot longer than I intended...and I could write more...
 
I don't think I was ever let in. I know that sounds dramatic and overreacting to emotion but I can't think of a time when I felt accepted other than my wedding and when I'm with my family (wife and daughter only that is).

This. The only people who I feel really accept me are my kids. I've never been a part of any "cliques" or groups at work or school. I've never received invitations for things, even from the coworkers that I get along the best with, but I'll hear about some of them doing things together after work or over the weekend or whatever. Even in my own family, I've felt left out- everyone but me attended my cousin's wedding, I never received an invite, and I didn't find out that my sister and her bf got married at the JP until a few months after it was done. That was when I finally signed up for Facebook- so at least I can kind of know some of these things even if nobody explicitly tells me- I even first found out that my uncle had died on FB.
 

MaliceInWickedland

Well-known member
I feel left out almost all the time. Whenever my friends and I actually hang out, they spend a while talking about random stuff but whenever I say something, they're just kinda like "Oh.." and then they keep talking amongst themselves like I didn't say anything to begin with. It's annoying and hurtful. I might as well just stay locked up here in my room forever if that's how people are going to treat me.
 

DeadmanWalking

Well-known member
I feel left out every time I leave my dorm. Usually, it doesn't bother me that much; however, at other times, I'm reminded of how alone I am down here. I watch everyone pass me by, talking with their friends with a smile on their faces (I think, I really can't look people in the eye). All the while, I'm stuck transporting myself from class to class with no one to keep me company but my mind. I really do wish to make friends, but I feel like I would rather stare down a basilisk than approach someone. I hate this alone feeling, it makes me feel like locking myself in my room and never coming out.
 

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
Not recently, I don't feel like there's anything for me to be left out of. Is that better though...
 

Phoenixx

Well-known member
I feel left out every time I leave my dorm. Usually, it doesn't bother me that much; however, at other times, I'm reminded of how alone I am down here. I watch everyone pass me by, talking with their friends with a smile on their faces (I think, I really can't look people in the eye). All the while, I'm stuck transporting myself from class to class with no one to keep me company but my mind. I really do wish to make friends, but I feel like I would rather stare down a basilisk than approach someone. I hate this alone feeling, it makes me feel like locking myself in my room and never coming out.
^ This is exactly how I've been for the last 5 weeks. And I feel exactly how you do, just locking myself up and never coming out.
 

Invisibleman

Well-known member
Yeah I feel left out all the time. When I was friends with my ex friend I used to sit while him and his friends made plans in front of me. I havent hung out with anybody in years and they would just exclude me completely.

Another thing that stands out in my mind for some reason,when I used to box there was this girl there. I was almost like a mentor so to speak,I helped her sparr and stuff id go easy to help her improve and that.

This went on for years. I went to the nationals and so did she. I got demolished but anyway she won the gold medal. She came out of the ring afterwards and there was a big crowd of people.

There was a big line of people she went down the line hugging every single one,she got to me....and she skipped over me completely,she went right to the next person and so on.I was the only one she didnt hug. Then she made a speech and thanked all the people that have helped her over the years. My name was nowhere. I looked around and my name was the only one that wasnt said.

that for some reason has stayed with me for a while. sorry for the rant haha
 
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