Do you have trouble laughing in front of others?

Miserum

Well-known member
With minor exception, I never really, sincerely laugh when I'm around others. I mean, I'll laugh, but it's either nervous laughter, or polite laughter. Sometimes someone will get me with something that I find REALLY funny, and then I'll sincerely laugh, but that's rare.

Sounds sociopathic and deceptive now that I write that out lol, but I guess it's just another symptom of feeling vulnerable because of my SA.

I only really gut-bust guffaw when I'm by myself watching something like Louis CK or a sitcom, or reading a thread on Reddit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8FzGlgVGdo
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
With minor exception, I never really, sincerely laugh when I'm around others. I mean, I'll laugh, but it's either nervous laughter, or polite laughter. Sometimes someone will get me with something that I find REALLY funny, and then I'll sincerely laugh, but that's rare.

Sounds sociopathic and deceptive now that I write that out lol, but I guess it's just another symptom of feeling vulnerable because of my SA.

Louis CK. :thumbup: I tried to get a ticket for a one-off show when he did in Scotland last year, but didn't have any luck.

I'm kinda the same. But I also have to take into account that my sense of humour is quite off-kilter. Having a love of puns, surrealism and dark humour. So, quite off-beat, ye could say. :giggle: So I can definitely relate. Though it's not so much the vulnerability, but the thought of folk judging me, negatively. Usually with people I don't know it's normally nervous or polite laughter. That said, if I make someone else laugh, usually unintentionally, I don't dwell on the embarrassment as much as I used to. :bigsmile:
 

Miserum

Well-known member
Hello fellow CK fan!

Though it's not so much the vulnerability, but the thought of folk judging me, negatively.

I feel vulnerability and negative judgement are one in the same. I feel vulnerable because I fear being judged.

I read somewhere recently that basically said "If people make fun of you for dancing (which generally happens when you're really enjoying yourself) they might as well be mocking you for happily laughing."

That struck a chord with me. What kind of ****off makes fun of someone for being happy? Or laughing your *** off? In any case, the quote didn't change much in me, but I think it makes a great deal of sense.
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hello fellow CK fan!

:greeting:


I feel vulnerability and negative judgement are one in the same. I feel vulnerable because I fear being judged.

I guess they are one in the same. Though, I'm the opposite, in the sense of being more guarded if I feel vulnerable.

I read somewhere recently that basically said "If people make fun of you for dancing (which generally happens when you're really enjoying yourself) they might as well be mocking you for happily laughing."

That struck a chord with me. What kind of ****off makes fun of someone for being happy? Or laughing your *** off? In any case, the quote didn't change much in me, but I think it makes a great deal of sense.

I'd agree with you on that. And speaking from personal experience, insecure people tend to be this way, since it makes them feel better about themselves at someone else's expense. And really miserable @rseholes tend to mock folk for being happy. I get from my own family a lot. If I'm smiling and happy:

"What's the matter with you, eh?!"

But then, my family are Scots/Irish, they tend to be miserable most of the time, anyway. :giggle:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgT7-yVU2zs

^ I tend to get asked this when I'm not smiling. Usually having to answer more than once before I get left alone. Which just leaves me in a shitty mood.:kickingmyself:
 

Miserum

Well-known member
Hahaha looks like Bill Hicks and you share one thing in common: Resting @sshole Face Syndrome.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v98CPXNiSk

I think I kind of have RAFS, but in my case it's AAFS(Active @sshole Face Syndrome).

Idk about you, but sometimes I feel I would fit in better in Russian society. Apparently it's looked down upon to smile too frequently without good reason--it's the sign of a dimwit.
 

Hot_Tamale

Well-known member
In high school and throughout much of college I would laugh while I was in class. No matter how hard I laughed almost no audible sound would come out of my mouth, I would just laugh really hard with my mouth open, eyes closed, and not make a lot of noise. I still catch myself doing that from time to time but not as much as I used to. I think it's because I'm too afraid what others would say if I made too much noise.
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
Hah, that b*tchy resting face video. Someone sent it to me once. Hey look it's you!

(As a survival mechanism to counter-effect my face and natural Daria attitude and be able to keep a job, I started to smile and laugh... All the time.)
 
Idk about you, but sometimes I feel I would fit in better in Russian society. Apparently it's looked down upon to smile too frequently without good reason--it's the sign of a dimwit.

I don't think i'd fit into Russian society (or any society but esp Russian), as i kinda have Active/Resting Gay Face Syndrome - people would think i'm gay, and i'd keep on getting beaten up! :giggle:
 
I actually haven't got a laugh. I hardly ever laughed growing up, so never developed "my own" laugh. When a situation requires me to laugh, i just fake one. If i genuinely want to laugh (very rare), if i can recall, it's probably silent or almost silent.
 

Miserum

Well-known member
I don't think i'd fit into Russian society (or any society but esp Russian), as i kinda have Active/Resting Gay Face Syndrome - people would think i'm gay, and i'd keep on getting beaten up! :giggle:

Gay Face Syndrome? Afraid I'm unfamiliar with that one... lol. Can you describe it?
 
Gay Face Syndrome? Afraid I'm unfamiliar with that one... lol. Can you describe it?

It's hard to describe. If your face looks gay, it looks gay. It's a permanent face, or "look". I guess "effeminate" is the best description i have. Or, if i went to a gay bar, i wouldn't look out of place. But at the same time, some women are attracted to my looks.
 
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FriendlyShadow

Well-known member
I can relate to this. Everytime someone tells me a joke I usually force myself to laugh (which doesn't always work.) I guess it's because of the fact that I went through so much in my life and having to deal with my depression, I find myself unable to laugh at things anymore. Luckily, a lot of people aren't able to tell whenever I fake a laugh, but there are some who can easily pick up on it and it just creates an awkward moment. To be perfectly honest, there's times when I just don't feel like laughing at all. Sometimes it could just be that I'm tired and I don't really have it in me to laugh at something others think is funny, not because I thought that their joke wasn't funny. It just is.
 
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Megaten

Well-known member
Yeah something would have to be seriously hilarious for me to be able to laugh comfortably. Or at least have the attention be far away from me. One thing Ive noticed is when people are trying to be funny they're looking my way for a reaction, and that whole interaction makes me uncomfortable. I really cant deal with the types of people that start off with one joke and then they keep running with it. In my head im like "ok buddy thats enough of all that...for the love of god please stop".
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hahaha looks like Bill Hicks and you share one thing in common: Resting @sshole Face Syndrome.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v98CPXNiSk

I think I kind of have RAFS, but in my case it's AAFS(Active @sshole Face Syndrome).

Oh yeah, I've definitely got the Resting Bitch Face expression if I'm not smiling. This dour, miserable, pissed-off look.

Idk about you, but sometimes I feel I would fit in better in Russian society. Apparently it's looked down upon to smile too frequently without good reason--it's the sign of a dimwit.

It's pretty much the same in Scotland. So.. :idontknow: :giggle:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
I can relate to this. Everytime someone tells me a joke I usually force myself to laugh (which doesn't always work.) I guess it's because of the fact that I went through so much in my life and having to deal with my depression, I find myself unable to laugh at things anymore.

^ I definitely relate. :sad:


Luckily, a lot of people aren't able to tell whenever I fake a laugh, but there are some who can easily pick up on it and it just creates an awkward moment. To be perfectly honest, there's times when I just don't feel like laughing at all. Sometimes it could just be that I'm tired and I don't really have it in me to laugh at something others think is funny, not because I thought that their joke wasn't funny. It just is.

Not to take away from what you said, but being expected laugh at a joke you've been told before is f**kin' annoying. My family used to do that all the time. Same joke, expect me to react the same way everytime. To the where I had to tell them my deadpan, monotone response of "Aye, very funny" was actually me being sarcastic. They'd mistaken it for me praising the joke. :eek:h:
 
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Miserum

Well-known member
I can relate to this. Everytime someone tells me a joke I usually force myself to laugh (which doesn't always work.) I guess it's because of the fact that I went through so much in my life and having to deal with my depression, I find myself unable to laugh at things anymore. Luckily, a lot of people aren't able to tell whenever I fake a laugh, but there are some who can easily pick up on it and it just creates an awkward moment. To be perfectly honest, there's times when I just don't feel like laughing at all. Sometimes it could just be that I'm tired and I don't really have it in me to laugh at something others think is funny, not because I thought that their joke wasn't funny. It just is.

Depression has the uncanny ability to make everything look bleak. I can empathize with not having the energy to laugh sometimes. **** depression.
 

FriendlyShadow

Well-known member
^ I definitely relate. :sad:




Not to take away from what you said, but being expected laugh at a joke you've been told before is f**kin' annoying. My family used to do that all the time. Same joke, expect me to react the same way everytime. To the where I had to tell them my deadpan, monotone response of "Aye, very funny" was actually me being sarcastic. They'd mistaken it for me praising the joke. :eek:h:

Yeah, I understand. I've honestly noticed now that it does take a lot for me to find humor in anything and laugh at it. I feel if I don't laugh along with everyone else either, then I'd probably be coming across as rude or aloof. It's especially hard to laugh at something when you're feeling like sh*t deep down. As a result, I think this problem may be part of the reason why it's affected my relationships with other people.
 
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