Worrying About Upcoming Situations

[Nl54]

Tonight I wen't over to a friend's house for some beers. Felt a little anxious before I wen't, but everything turned out just fine and I had fun. This seems to happen everytime an event is coming up. My rational mind knows that everything will most likely be okay, but I still can't help analyizing it in a negative fashion. After the event is over, I always ask myself "Why do you work yourself up over nothing?", yet I do it again the next time. It really is a habitual way of viewing things that keeps us locked in this mentality..it's like your mind always jumps to worst case scnerario.

Thoughts?

 

[Dryad]

Exactly what I do, I know I will be fine, the building will not collapse and yeah no one is gonna go on a killing rampage... however there is the primal part of your brain that kicks on "Flight or fight" in my case.... RUN AWAY!!!! lol
I made the mistake to run, try going out while you still can, you can beat this right now but it gets much more difficult when you don't even want to leave the house.

 

[KiaKaha]

Thats a clear sign of social anxiety disorder. That happens to me too. Sometimes I worry about things weeks before they actually happen..and by the time the event actually comes I am so worked up about it I am incapable of getting through it.

Usually when that happens its situations like group activities or social gatherings. I dont like the overwhelming anxiety so I usually just avoid instead.

 

[vj288]

I know that feeling too. If you know that everything is going to be okay though, maybe trying to distract yourself may be a good idea? Tv, video game, book, puzzle, workout, whatever keeps your mind busy. May help avoid that worrying feeling

 

[Flowers-Of-Bloom]

Yep, I do the same. I start getting anxious at night if I have to go out somewhere the following day, so much that sometimes I can't get to sleep. If the anxiety is too much, then I might back out and decide not to go. Of course when I do go, say over to a friend's house the drive there mostly consists of me dreading it and feeling absolutely terrible. However, when I get there and meet them I'm mostly relieved that it's not nearly as bad I'd imagined.
Sometimes it is though. ._.

Usually it's just us imagining the worst case scenario, so most of it is in our heads... most.

 

[Mickery]

Rationalize it in a specific way. You're not analyzing it because you don't know what's going to happen, you're predicting it. There's a big difference. What you should do is write down specifically what you think is going to happen and the consequences of it happening. Give a score out of 10 or something about how nervous you are. After it's happened, write down whether it happened, the consequences of what did happen, if any, and how nervous you were at the time/after.

Compare and contrast.

 

[cowboyup]

I do that as well. I would think the worst possible scenario - conjure up some weird thing in my head and everytime I've gained courage to actually go someplace it turns out I do have fun and was glad I went.

Otherwise, in far too many cases, I have talked or rationalized myself right out of a good time

Now, everytime I am invited someplace or whatever, I try to remember the last thing I went to and think of the good times I had and hoepfully it motivates me to get my butt in gear to get out there and just do it!

 

[Aletheia]

I do that, and sometimes I end up so paralysed by fear I can't go. I focus on the worst possible outcome, I know. Distraction can help, as vj288 suggests. And the vast majority of occasions, it's not so bad once I get there.

But as Flowers-of-Bloom says, sometimes it is. And it only needs to be bad once for me to torture myself about it ever more. And never ever ever ever want to put myself in that position again.

 

[mikebird]

That's a regular scenario to me, too.

Maybe rooted in my love of cannabis when I was 15, 16. Great for mixing with mates and adding all kinds of depth of thoughts, and some anxiety / paranoia. It never made me relax - just on the edge of being nervous. After that, adding beer to that made me a lot more social too.

I do love it when I accept an invitation to visit people or go to parties, worrying what might happen, but most things usually end up pretty positive

But I've become more selective about who I mix with, and I think it's not all that healthy any more...

 

[Nala]

Heh, story of my life!

I worry about pretty much everything. The upcoming week, if I have to speak to strangers, if I have to speak on the phone, etc.

It's very annoying and draining.

 

[CHAKRAPOINT]

sumtimes things dont turn out as expected buut worse.....anyone here also experiences that the majority of the time?

 

[stevelee24]

Tonight I wen't over to a friend's house for some beers. Felt a little anxious before I wen't, but everything turned out just fine and I had fun. This seems to happen everytime an event is coming up. My rational mind knows that everything will most likely be okay, but I still can't help analyizing it in a negative fashion. After the event is over, I always ask myself "Why do you work yourself up over nothing?", yet I do it again the next time. It really is a habitual way of viewing things that keeps us locked in this mentality..it's like your mind always jumps to worst case scnerario.

Thoughts?

i really relate to this mostly i get so stressed about it i just dont go

 

[pirl]

Sounds exactly like me.

Had a wedding a while back and I spent a good bit of time in the build up worrying about it. Turned out I was in a good frame of mind when I went and had a great night. Went home the next day wondering why I got so worked out and telling myself I must get out more.

I actually went through a stage where I'd excuse myself from nights out and cite money (to myself and my wife) as a reason even though I could afford to go our. Looking back, I realise I was only using this as an excuse.

I've no bother going out however with my close set of friends.. it's when I go outside this grouping that I can have issues.

 

[Mr. Paranoid]

I always worry about the possibility of having to use a public restroom.

 

[Nl54]

i really relate to this mostly i get so stressed about it i just dont go

Yeah. When he asked me to have some beers, my first impulse was to lie and say I had something else to do...but I shrugged it off and wen't anyhow. Glad I did too, he's a pretty good fella to hang around with.