That's interesting Stuckinthehouse. I never considered it OCD either. Good luck with your discussion with your therapist, please let me know what happens.
Thank you all for ur support. For me it is not a sexual thing at all as others have said. It is just the specific trigger I have. The normal scenario is, as soon as a female enters room my anxiety peaks and my brain says oh no, hope it's not alow cut shirt, I do a quick check and hope for a tshirt or turtleneck. But if not then I immediately feel the adrenaline rise and anxiety kick in. The remainder of the situation I look for angles to avoid eye contact, ways to get out of the room, anything to avoid looking at the person. I realize desensitization is needed but I struggle to find ways to try. I try it watching tv but I have realized it is real life scenarios that bring it on, I am totally fine looking at tv. I am really trying to find a way to cope but nothing seems to work well. For the poster that mentioned moles, arm, etc it is very similar to that for me. Almost like my brain is telling me not to which makes it impossible not to. I have told my wife but I am not sure she truly understands it although thankfully she understands it is not sexual. Sorry for the rambling but it does feel great to know there are others And we are all trying to work thru it.
The anxiety only ends when the trigger is removed. It isn't a matter of only looking once and being done with it. If only it was that simple.
If you force yourself to not look,the will to look will become greater, so just take a glimpse and be over with