What to do now ?

Goblinko

Goblinko

Active member
(If this is the wrong thread to be posted, I'm sorry. I haven't found any thread to fit this in so it gotta stay here.)

Well, to starters, I once knew the following web comic called "The Pride of Life", which can be found on - The Pride of Life - Give a Roar!

In the beginning I passed to like from the story, the plot and everything else. But when I met the main character...I hated him with a passion. :veryangry:
Even I commented once, trying to understand why he's like that, and I confess I went kinda "overboard" with my comment.

Many days later after this, I sent her an apology e-mail due to this comment. It also has her reply to my letter, which made me feel very guilty at the time - http://goo.gl/157hO

The last sentence was like a point blank gunshot on my heart. :sad:

"Do not contact me again." *BANG!*

I think I screwed up big time this time.
Even nowadays, I wonder if she now holds a grudge against me. I wonder if I hurt her big time. I wonder if I went overboard again.

But all in all, I've learnt my lessons: to not be a perfectionist, to not be impatient, to not push myself to like from something I don't like, to not push others to have my preferences, to not be "brutally" honest and to respect others' people feelings when giving a honest opinion on anything.

What I must do now ? Every time I see her drawings the "bad" feelings I felt at the time come to me again. I know I must let them go, but it feels like they're more strong than me, like some sort of "traumatic" event.

What do I do now ? Should I try to apologize again, let it go, forget her, what ?
 
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Goblinko

Goblinko

Active member
At least a piece of advice would be welcome.

Sorry by the bump, it's because my topic was "put on hold" for some days due to the links.
 
J

jaim38

Well-known member
Some people don't take criticism very well and don't appreciate brutal honesty, maybe because of their culture, personality, etc. I think you should just let it go and move on. If you don't like the main character, find a better web comic to read.
 
dottie

dottie

Well-known member
I once knew the following web comic
Click to expand...

knew? or internet-stalked under the delusion that you knew this person? even the word "once" implies that even if you really did know them, that was over with a long time ago.

Goblinko said:
"Do not contact me again." *BANG!*
Click to expand...

stop being a creep and forget this person.
 
Goblinko

Goblinko

Active member
jaim38 said:
Some people don't take criticism very well and don't appreciate brutal honesty, maybe because of their culture, personality, etc. I think you should just let it go and move on. If you don't like the main character, find a better web comic to read.
Click to expand...

Hmm, I see.
Also, don't forget that some people dislike to take criticism due to self-esteem issues and/or "perfectionist" parents, so, they tend to take it as a personal attack.

Ok, will follow your suggestions. Thank you. :)
 
Goblinko

Goblinko

Active member
dottie said:
knew? or internet-stalked under the delusion that you knew this person? even the word "once" implies that even if you really did know them, that was over with a long time ago.

stop being a creep and forget this person.
Click to expand...

No, no stalking. I've knew the comic by an online advertising ad.

And thanks for "shaking me up". Sometimes in life we need a "wake up call".
 
vj288

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
I'd leave her alone, and based on the email I think it should be clear the relationship she viewed you two had was - you were a fan of her work, and she treated you as a fan and a critic. The problem was not in what you thought but how you presented it, as if her comic should be tailor made to your idea of how it should be done, or if there is a specific thing she should be doing with her characters. SHE is the author, she can do whatever she wants. She said she welcomes criticism, which is different than blatantly attacking what she decided to do creatively.

I doubt she cares as much about this as you do, or is hurt by the things you said. You just no longer have any reason to contact her, she does not look to you or is interested in hearing what you have to say about how her comic should be different. Obvious creative differences, which is not something to apologize for. You were just rude and presumptuous in your presentation..which you really didn't apologize for. There's no reason to contact her anymore though, she's getting on with her own life fine and doubtfully is torn up and needs an apology for closure. And there is no relationship to mend on your end with her, you can enjoy her comics (or not) without contacting her at all.
 
JackOfSpades

JackOfSpades

Well-known member
Also, there are ways to be honest and respectful. I think terms like "brutally honest" and "just being honest" are sometimes shorthand for "I'm about to be an...", you know the rest. Honesty and rudeness are not interchangeable.
 
Goblinko

Goblinko

Active member
vj288 said:
I'd leave her alone, and based on the email I think it should be clear the relationship she viewed you two had was - you were a fan of her work, and she treated you as a fan and a critic. The problem was not in what you thought but how you presented it, as if her comic should be tailor made to your idea of how it should be done, or if there is a specific thing she should be doing with her characters. SHE is the author, she can do whatever she wants. She said she welcomes criticism, which is different than blatantly attacking what she decided to do creatively.

I doubt she cares as much about this as you do, or is hurt by the things you said. You just no longer have any reason to contact her, she does not look to you or is interested in hearing what you have to say about how her comic should be different. Obvious creative differences, which is not something to apologize for. You were just rude and presumptuous in your presentation..which you really didn't apologize for. There's no reason to contact her anymore though, she's getting on with her own life fine and doubtfully is torn up and needs an apology for closure. And there is no relationship to mend on your end with her, you can enjoy her comics (or not) without contacting her at all.
Click to expand...

Yeah. Once I realized this I was like "What I have done ? Where I was when I wrote this ?".

But I understand your point. And, as ditto advised, I'll move on with my life. Thanks for your reply.
 
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