What caused your SA?

Rise Against

Well-known member
#1
I remember my first semester in 7th grade I was flunking all of my classes even though i tried extremely hard at school. I would spend hours and hours doing homework every night but still got bad grades. I remember the school councilor wanted to put me in the LD classes and assign me a personal learning assistant but i refused, then she said that if i dont change my classes i would have to retake 7th grade. I felt so stupid and lost all of my confidence and self esteem. My parents were disappointed with my lack of success at school. I was embarrassed to be around people because i felt retarded. Then i went to a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with severe ADD. The doctor prescribed me adderall and then i got straight A's the second semester. Now im a senior in high school and continue to get good grades but i still feel stupid and worthless... The good news is that I have recently started taking lexapro for social phobia/depression and i have already noticed a huge change in my behavior. Yesterday i actually approached and talked to a beautiful girl (the first time ever!) and suprisingly im actually exited to go to school tomorrow and hopefully find the courage to talk to another girl that I've been admiring. Hopefully this medication will help me turn my social life around.

So do you know what caused your social anxiety?
 

Errordotocx

Well-known member
#2
I've always been a little shy, so I guess you could say that contributes a little bit. But it really started in High-school when I was about 14. Betrayal by people that I thought were my friends, bad acne, afraid to stand up for myself, being rejected from the girls that I tried expressing my like to, less and less social interaction towards the last few years of my high-school life.

In the past few years since I have graduated I have been working on turing things around and it's going well sofar. I've pushed myself and am still pushing myself to get rid of SAD. I took Lexapro back around tenth grade for depression and I can say that it did infact help. But don't let a pill mask the real problem. I believe that acknowledging that one has SAD, then take steps to cure it yourself is the best medicine. I've acknowledged that I have SAD to a certain degree and am making steps to leave it behind. While there are still tough times here and there, I keep optimistic as much as possible. Just keep hanging in there and trying harder. I believe things will get better.
 

mndigi

Well-known member
#3
When I was 6, I put on some weight, and kids teased me brutally. I remember it was a shock because I didn't think I was fat. Then I lost my father at 8, and I remember thinking whether the kids at school would sit around in a circle and conspire to call me fat. Because I honestly didn't think I was fat. But after that, maybe from the constant degradation, and maybe from losing my father, I actually became fat and even started recognizing so. So the degradations by fellow kids continued, and my life was ruined enough to strike out 8-10 years off it in a swipe in the future.
 

lettypagb

Well-known member
#4
one hundred reasons

my grandmother had eplepsia
i was bullied in school since i was 5
i was repressed sexualy : gay
i moved to a different country
drug abuse
divorced parents


and the list goes on.
 

mismeek

Well-known member
#5
I was very shy when i was little. Then I was abused by my family when I was in grade school.. it kinda sucked lol. ^.^;
 
#6
A bunch of things. But I think the first incident was when I was about three of four years old. I was with my daycare mom and we were walking her daughter to the school bus for the first time. I thought I was going too so I went on the bus. The kids seemed to find it rather endearing but my daycare mom actually called me stupid to her friend and ignored me as we went back to the house. Now I'm always afraid of looking stupid if I try to do something on my own.
 
#7
I think it was my 3rd grade mexican teacher. He was intimidated and treats the boys in the classroom like crap, all the girls get the goodies and the boys gets sent to the wall to sit.

I'm afraid of adults who have big mustache maybe because of him because I remember he had a mustache too.
 

Satine

Well-known member
#8
My parents went through some hard times when I was very little: mum came off long-term medication, dad got depressed, they had family fallouts. I think that put me on edge, and when I went to school I just acted weird with the other kids as I didn't know anything other than the tense feeling of family arguments.

So the kids started treating me like a weirdo, so I started acting like one. A few years later I just wanted to fit in but there wasn't any way I could by then. I didn't have the life experience to.
 

Nl54

Well-known member
#9
Good story :) I spent years trying to realize what made me feel the way I feel around other people (nervous, anxious, inferior, etc.) There just had to be a root cause. Then, one day it came to me while I was alone having a few beers and thinking about the past. Seemed like an embarrassing memory that had been buried in my subconcsious. When I was 10-12 yrs old, I was involved in martial arts. Our class had to do a demonstration in front of about 500 people. I had to break a board with my hand and then jump kick and break one. Well, the one with my hand went fine and snapped no problem. But when I went to do the jump kick, the board didn't seem to want to break, and I had done this before without fail. I remember my face feeling steaming hot, my shoulders dropping and wanting to go crawl in a hole somewhere and be alone. Nobody laughed at me from what I remember, only claps. But even still, it tore down my confidence around other people something awful. I guess my whole point of this story is that we are too hard on ourselves sometimes. Even the winners in life fail sometimes...what makes them different from us is that they brush themselves off and keep going :)
 
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