Under the anxiety...

[NightTimeForever]

Well, not really, but I am working on it.

 

[Opaline]

It took me a long time to realize that I wasn't an angry, impatient, irritable, hateful person...but that these were just manifestations of my general anxiety. Once I had that epiphany, and realized that I was a good person underneath it all, it helped me learn to cope with my anxious feelings, and I've become a much more pleasant person to be around because of it. If I feel myself becoming irritated and irate, I no longer feed into that and act on it, thus feeling even worse about myself in the process. Instead, I recognize it as anxiety, accept the feelings, and try to find a way to ease the feelings, instead of becoming Miss Psycho-b*tch.

I had that epiphany myself, probably sometime last year. I act grumpy, negative, and whine more when I'm feeling anxious. Otherwise, the minor problems of life aren't enough to turn me into that psycho bitch. It's the big problems I struggle with that sap my positivity and make me seem miserable at times.

I'm glad you realized this and are getting better at it

 

[Silatuyok]

It took me a long time to realize that I wasn't an angry, impatient, irritable, hateful person...but that these were just manifestations of my general anxiety. Once I had that epiphany, and realized that I was a good person underneath it all, it helped me learn to cope with my anxious feelings, and I've become a much more pleasant person to be around because of it. If I feel myself becoming irritated and irate, I no longer feed into that and act on it, thus feeling even worse about myself in the process. Instead, I recognize it as anxiety, accept the feelings, and try to find a way to ease the feelings, instead of becoming Miss Psycho-b*tch.

Conversely, this has helped me to understand other people's behaviors as well...

 

[Finally]

I had a 3 month period in 2005 when I was completely anxiety free. It was the most incredible feeling and I loved who I was. I could actually look into the mirror and be happy of what I saw. I would wake up in the morning and be so happy to be awake. My mind was blank. I was living in the moment. Since that time I have been searching for that feeling ever since.

These 3 months appeared at a time when I had been off all antidepressant and anxiety medication for 10 months and had just been perscribed prozac and trazadone (trazadone gave me the best sleep and most vivid dreams of my life) because of stress at my job.

 

[lurknomore]

Under my anxiety is a person I don't like. I think I've hidden under anxiety so that I don't have to face the person I really am, in fact, I think I'm more terrified of that than I am of other people. I guess my anxiety is mostly the fear that others will discover the "real" me, and hate me.

 

[gustavofring]

Underneath this temporary manifestation of the universe, this body form, this mind and ego, its problems and how it may view itself and the world, is pure conciousness. The unmanifested.

Maybe I went a bit too deep.

 

[Opaline]

Thanks for the replies, everyone.

I hope some of you realize the positive things about yourself and not just focus on the negative. I was reading some of the posts and thinking, "Really, there isn't one thing he/she could think of? Because I can think of a few just from reading his/her posts online."

 

[SilentBird]

... is unfulfillment.

 

[lonelee1]

i guess sometimes i like what's under the anxiety. but honestly, the SA and ocd and other crap disorders have become part of my persona. maybe i've made it that way. i don't know.

its kind of scary for me, as i'm getting better, to start building who i am and how i want to live. scary but also kind of exciting. i guess its all come at the right time though. i may always be a shy person, and that's fine, but i'd also like to be much more than that.

i've looked at myself from all possible angles, pointed fingers at myself and come out the other side realizing life's going to be okay.

 

[Isolated_Writer]

I think I'm terribly boring but really, I like myself.

 

[Duzmiu]

i prefer myself when im free of anxiety alot of the time im alone sometimes i could be talking to people online or playing online games. last couple of days i spoke to some people on skype i havent spoken to in along time and it felt great.
only time im able to relax is when im anxiety free so being free of it even if only for an hour is brilliant, can truely relax and be the real me which very few people know now

i hate my anxiety but at the same time im glad i have it or i wouldnt of become friends with someone i met on here who's friendship i enjoy more then most and only hope to meet even more amazing people on here.