theres no way out anymore

[Falkor]

hello,

i dont know what to do anymore.. my family says im lazy and i dont want anymore.. i just dont have a will anymore, im lazy!
she says i will get old stuck in a house.. this hurts.. i feel so much sadness
i dont know what to do.. i cant live this life with sa..
and everyone feels like im complaining and ranting about eveyrthing
while this is a serious issue.. i really feel afraid of everything
i think my life is over.. there is no way out.. i will be agoraphobic my whole life.. i dont want this!!!!

 

[springk]

hi flowergirlie,

are you lazy? i dont think so. what do you think? it doesn't matters what others think.

they dont know your problem,that is why they dont understand and call you lazy.

your life isn't over. i know it feels like..cos that is what i feel with my ocd. every moment is a fight against ourselves..but still, dont you want to live this life that's so difficult but yet there is so much to live.

 

[slowmotiondaydream]

we'll organise a meet up with the entire site. now who'll be laughing with the amount of friends you have

chin up flower. have hope and i promise it'll get better

 

[DanFC]

I don't know about you, but even though my SA gets in the way of me getting ahead in life, my laziness to at least try to deal with the situation can often be just as hindering.

So, I think you may need to figure out what's due explicitly to your fear and what's not. And from whatever is not, work your a way out.

For example, sure, you may not want to go outside to continue your education, but you could look for alternatives that don't require you to go outside (where I am, many college classes are available completely online).

 

[UglyAsianGuy]

There are plenty of others (here on this forum) who are going through the same situations as you described and worse. You have to look on the bright side. You're hot and you can play guitar, and Wow you can sing too. So at least you have somewhere to start? This is coming from a random creep, but I'm sure other people here are thinking the same.

 

[CosmicNeurotica]

First of all, I know you're not lazy. I've seen your youtube videos.
You sing and play music, and are very good at it.
Maybe you don't have a social life, but who cares. It doesn't matter. I don't have a social life. I don't even have friends.
I know you have friends flower, and I know you think optimistically. As well you should.
You are beautiful, have a pretty voice, and know how to play a few chords.
I admire you.
You have nothing to be ashamed about.

 

[Falkor]

hey thnx to you all..
It just slammed me like a sledgehammer, words really touch me..
I'm really sensetive when it comes to this.. when someone tells me bad stuff, i think about it all over and over again.. fighting to NOT believe the words they said.. I take words liturally, and personal. So people need to be careful.

But thank you. although I can't see the way you people look at me, I'm happy you guys feel that way. But it's just a sad situation I'm in.
and I sure can think optimistic, but I can also be really pessimistic
So bad, that I start to believe my whole life is a failure
Because I'm not like the other teenagers
I am really angry and sad when I think about what SA does to me..
It gets me into a life without oppurtunities
and I'm about to try to study again and find a job
but at the same time i think... Wow.. I cant ever do that..
because it will makes me afraid like hell
and no. im not lazy.. it may look like , but im totally not
and i need support.. but my family dont want to get involved with my probs anymore
because they dont want me to ''bother'' them with it
and i deal with it everyday.. so i feel so lost.. i need support so bad
but they dont want to.. i understand.. because they dont have energy left
they have issues too.. but i wish they could be a little more carefully with me
but tomorrow im going to view an appartment , with a counselor, counselors work there
to help people progress living on their own and get help for psychological issues
so.. I hope its a good place so i can get there..

 

[CosmicNeurotica]

I wish you all the luck flower, or should I say Saskia
And by the way, there's one youtube video of you speaking a foreign language, and I have to say that was just sexy. I have no idea what you were saying, but I was listening lol.

And hey look, no one is a failure. No matter what you don't do. It's not about what you do, it's about who you are. And you're a good person.
Not only that, but just look at what everyone else thinks about you. You have the guts to show on youtube your real self, something that a lot of us only wish we could do. And people love you.
I think you're an inspiration. And I also think you'll be fine

 

[Ignace]

Nobody of us wants this. Like you always say: Work on it !
You do say it, right ?

 

[Falkor]

Nobody of us wants this. Like you always say: Work on it !
You do say it, right ?

Well yeah, I think people should work on it. But I never use that sentence, maybe you mean someone else on this forum? But I do, think we should keep fighting against this sa. =)
never give up the fight.. my mood swings are really weird.. =S

 

[CosmicNeurotica]

Sorry for taking over your topic, but I don't want to be here anymore.
I miss the past. But only because I had fantasies in the past. Because I had dreams, and times when I felt those dreams could come true. I was living in a fantasy.
When reality sets it and it's been years since I've been outside, every day thinking everything's going to be ok, every day thinking I can overcome this, every day thinking where did the past go, every day thinking I love you but why don't you love me.

I'm really sorry. I should make my own topic for this. But I don't want anyone to really read this.
Sorry. I know you don't like me anyway.
I love you guys though.

I need help.

 

[PunkRotten]

If you do not wanna be like this forever start accepting yourself. Reason you are this way is you create all the problems yourself. Stop trying to be something you are not. Once you get this out of the way you get a better position to making directions in your life.

 

[PunkRotten]

Sorry for taking over your topic, but I don't want to be here anymore.
I miss the past. But only because I had fantasies in the past. Because I had dreams, and times when I felt those dreams could come true. I was living in a fantasy.
When reality sets it and it's been years since I've been outside, every day thinking everything's going to be ok, every day thinking I can overcome this, every day thinking where did the past go, every day thinking I love you but why don't you love me.

I'm really sorry. I should make my own topic for this. But I don't want anyone to really read this.
Sorry. I know you don't like me anyway.
I love you guys though.

I need help.

If you want someone to talk to you can message me. You can even IM me if you want if you have MSN, yahoo, etc

 

[PunkRotten]

What the problem really is, is that you are probably so far into this confusion of identity that you no longer know who you really are. Perhaps you never knew who you were. This is really common for alot of people (not just SAers). I see alot of your threads comparing yourself to people on TV and models and things like that.

What you and others need to do is start living your life and being YOU. Reason why you all are so insecure is because of this reason. You are trying to be something you are not. Start accepting yourself - flaws and all. It really does get better. When you are honest with yourself you are honest with others.

Think about the person you are deep down inside, think about the person you wanna be. Think about the person you want to project to others. When others see you they will notice THIS person, not this made up one you are trying to be. There is nothing to be ashamed of, NO ONE is perfect.


People care about who you are inside. I do not care what anyone says, people think its all about looks it's not. Once you have a strong sense of identity people will come to you. As long as you are independent, honest, and being yourself others will like you. People do not like fakers, and clingy/needy people.

But eventually you will go from insecure, clingy, confused, to confident and independent. You just have to start by accepting yourself. Then every day start thinking about who you are inside, spend time doing this. Spend time thinking of your values, write all this down if you need to. Go out and try to have a life. Go to a park, beach, a store, do some grocery shopping, go to a pet store and look at pets, anything. Just start getting out of the house and living your life.


Do not worry about all the bull****. Do not worry about BFs/GFs/Jobs/Marriage/School/impressing others, etc. Worry only about your health and who you are. When you got a good grasp on your identity and life the rest will follow. Only worry about things when the time comes not before it comes.

 

[Falkor]

@PunkRotten:

Thank you for the great advice, it's so true what you say.
I will take the advice, and try to hold it on this way
I feel good right now after reading your advice
thank you

 

[DespairSoul]

I dont agree with line like people care who u are inside. This is not true maybe some good hearted people but more people are fake,arogant and thinking only about how do you look.
If u look diffrent and u are average a for some people even ugly next to them they really dont care they dont give a **** who u are inside.

They just care wich clothes they wear,how they look smooking hot...and someone who is average /but average is for very good looking people sometimes ugly/ u dont have chance hang with them around...and of course those people make this phobia stronger...

I always care about inside coz i know appearance is only gold out but inside could be empty soul...but i started have phobia actually coz of those people what dont give **** who u really are and i cant be me in front of them coz i pretend im happy but im not, i smile even if i dont think is funny and i do im fake coz i dont have chooise to sometimes say my own opinion coz i think they will dislike me even more. I cant be me and this hurt the most i can be me only in front the closest person and say my fears.

Punkrotten u talk just like my mom be you and dont care about others but this so damnn hard. Indeed we should have other values. But how to find them this is question if always some one start judge u coz of no values stuff but for them are valuable and this what u was trying building fall like house from cards. But i love your comment and i wish have to power do it and fight but i dont have it i hope one day i will stop thinking so negative about myself. I know this response was for flowergirlie but i feel the same way like she. Flowergirlie i cross my fingers for u and i wish the best for u!!!!!!!!!

 

[CosmicNeurotica]

thanks for overlooking me flower

 

[PurpleOne]

at least people respect you.

 

[CosmicNeurotica]

Respect me? fat chance.
No one respects me at all. I don't know where the hell you got that from.
I have no job, no friends, no life.

 

[honeydippedxo]

When you feel sad because of something someone says to you try to do something that makes you feel the opposite. if they are calling you lazy and you feel lazy then do something thats not lazy. do the dishes, clean your room, get dressed and go for a walk stuff like that. also try not to put others opinions over your own. you are important. your opinions are valuable. and most importantly there is nothing wrong with you. btw does anyone in spw have a decent, supportive, understanding family? seems like everyones family is so mean and you are all so great and sweet. wtf.