The thought of sex terrifies me!

[turkjey5]

Hi,
I'm a 43 year old male virgin who would like to have some sexual experinces but I'm literally scared shitless. I met a girl and to cut a long story short we shared a bed. Sex was not part of the deal but I wanted to reach over and touch her but as soon as I got very close my heart started pounding out of my chest and I felt like I had to take a shit. I panicked, "OMG I'm gay!" I even visited a gay bathhouse to see what would happen but I didn't feel any erotic pull even though a couple of guys hit on me. So here I am, stuck as always, where even the thought of intimate contact starts that feeling like I have to shit, thereby making erection impossible. It's even fucked up my fantasy and porn watching pleasure. Just thought I'd share. If anything, for anyone who thinks they're fucked up, rest assured there is someone out there who is more so: me!

 

[no1]

Wow man.. I sympathize with you. Tbh.. I don't even know if at 43 I would find any woman that same age "hot", and to find a younger one at that age might well look weird.

I'm sorry. I wish you the best.

 

[Kien]

Wow now that is quite a strange thing. :S Feeling of having to take a shit.

 

[recluse]

I'm also shit scared! I mean do women want the man to do all the moves they do in porno's o'r what? What if i get so nervous i'll just freeze and i wont be able to get an erection? What if i climax too soon? The list of questions going through my mind is endless. This is why i hope my first time will be with a girl who is also a virgin....And in a proper relationship.

 

[weak]

Sounds like an extreme case of performance anxiety. It's a bitch man, especially when it affects your ability to get an erection.. cause at that point there's not much you can do.

I have a certain degree of performance anxiety. I don't get physically ill or anything like that, but i've certainly had my fair share of humiliating experiences. Basically if I'm intimidated by the girl, I wont be able to get it up. And unfortunately, I'm intimidated by 99% of woman.

 

[Argamemnon]

I'm sorry to hear that, I'm the same. Are you from Turkey?

 

[freestylemonster]

There's nothing to be scared of I did it for the first time a week ago. I was having trouble getting completely hard so I kept pleasuring her with my fingers until I felt I was hard enough to give it a go. It all worked out fine, she seemed to enjoy it. It's really easy too. Nothin to be scared of at all!

whoo feels wierd talking about this stuff haha

 

[NormanBates]

It's all about keeping a good rhythm. The moment where you paused was just a breech. Nothing too horrible. You just have to start over. Maybe do something different. Change things up a little bit. Was something small and insignificant bothering you? Was the room too cold? Were the sheets itchy? Sometimes a little thing like that can make all the difference between fight or flight. Try changing that, and then go for a round 2!

my last experience took 3 tries. lol
we even had to run to the store right quick, but it was worth it.

 

[Dave_McFadden]

I'm also shit scared! I mean do women want the man to do all the moves they do in porno's o'r what? What if i get so nervous i'll just freeze and i wont be able to get an erection? What if i climax too soon? The list of questions going through my mind is endless. This is why i hope my first time will be with a girl who is also a virgin....And in a proper relationship.

Remember all that stuff you daydreamed about doing to a woman if you ever got one in your clutches? Well, do all that and you'll be ok.

There's nothing to be scared of I did it for the first time a week ago. I was having trouble getting completely hard so I kept pleasuring her with my fingers until I felt I was hard enough to give it a go. It all worked out fine, she seemed to enjoy it. It's really easy too. Nothin to be scared of at all! .

This is a good idea too. If you find yourself losing your, um..."nerve", so to speak, use your hands (and mouth). Whenyou feel her respond, you'll recover.

whoo feels wierd talking about this stuff haha

Congratulations!

 

[Livingwithoutlivin]

That's just the way that you are thinking about it. I used to think that I would never have sex, but I did, and when the time came. I was horny and the guy was horny and all. But when my anxiety developed I could not look at him during sex.