Shyness and Inexperience: A deadly Combo?

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licorice

Well-known member
Jay if I ever were to get married,I always thought I would want to elope to Las Vegas and pull up to a drive thru and order a burger,fries,and a marriage and when they ask if I want a coke with that my reply would be "did I ask for a coke"umm no,then "no coke"...haha,I crack myself up,ok maybe only myself...No bridezilla over here!...Ok,the people reading this are probably saying we should just get a room already,so I apologize for digression...
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
licorice said:
Jay if I ever were to get married,I always thought I would want to elope to Las Vegas and pull up to a drive thru and order a burger,fries,and a marriage and when they ask if I want a coke with that my reply would be "did I ask for a coke"umm no,then "no coke"...haha,I crack myself up,ok maybe only myself...No bridezilla over here!...Ok,the people reading this are probably saying we should just get a room already,so I apologize for digression...
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LOL

For all the guys on this board who are always posting "but I never know what to say... especially when talking to girls!", take a look at how I've been communicating with Licorice. Even though it's an online chat, the way I've been speaking to her is EXACTLY how I talk to women when either face-to-face or when texting them. And look... a few quick messages back and forth have led to a whirlwind marriage... and a honeymoon in a seedy vegas hotel. ::p:
 
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licorice

Well-known member
I hear you Pinker,its easy for people like Jay and I to say just talk to others this way but its so much easier said than done..I am very sarcastic and I like to joke around alot and its easy to do on-line or with people who I've known for a while,but if Im in a certain mood or Im surrounded by people who make me uneasy then I retreat into my shell...Lately I have been having the attitude such as who really cares what most people think,none of these people pay my rent,nor could care less so why should I care so much what they think of me..e.g-say I go out dancing,instead of sitting there with a puss on(like I used to)I get out there and try to have a blast regardless of how foolish I look..Will most likely never see those people again,and everyone is insecure to some degree,dont care what they look like or how cool they are,they are insecure in some way,trust me...
 
SalemEdgerton1

SalemEdgerton1

Well-known member
So true. Everyone has insecurities about themselves, for me at least I tend to be more conscious of it. I commend you licorice, getting out on a dance floor is not an easy thing to do.
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
Pinker said:
Haha, nah, it's just, I don't have issues with interpersonal skills, it's just depression stops me getting out there, and anxiety gives me terrible nerves whenever i'm in the situation. When I see people having fun it gets me down because that should be me and more, but it's never been straightforward.
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You should get in the habit of instantly rewording all negative thoughts. Say, "Wow... I can allow myself to be happy when I see people having fun because if others can, then I can learn how to have fun too."

If you don't force your brain to start looking for solutions, it will keep you stuck where you are indefinitely.

licorice said:
I hear you Pinker,its easy for people like Jay and I to say just talk to others this way but its so much easier said than done..I am very sarcastic and I like to joke around alot and its easy to do on-line or with people who I've known for a while,but if Im in a certain mood or Im surrounded by people who make me uneasy then I retreat into my shell...Lately I have been having the attitude such as who really cares what most people think,none of these people pay my rent,nor could care less so why should I care so much what they think of me..e.g-say I go out dancing,instead of sitting there with a puss on(like I used to)I get out there and try to have a blast regardless of how foolish I look..Will most likely never see those people again,and everyone is insecure to some degree,dont care what they look like or how cool they are,they are insecure in some way,trust me...
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My wifey knows her stuff. EVERYONE is insecure to some degree and everyone feels uneasy occasionally... and most people are way too concerned with how they are being perceived by others to worry about you.

I think many of us have this irrational fear of being stared at, criticized or judged by others when the truth is that most people are too stuck inside their own heads to even notice us. They're too busy worrying that we're staring at, criticizing and judging them.
 
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licorice

Well-known member
Hey Jay,just be glad you havent witnesses my moves on the dance floor cause you boy would you be stalking me to no end,and you would be trading in the Depend diaper wearing,Metamucil drinking grandmas for the real deal..I find it very cute when someone can twist their insecurities around and say the exact opposite of what they believe to be true,such as me just alluding to being a great dancer(which is far from the truth),but all in a jokingly way to break the ice...e.g.-say you dont believe you have a way with women,etc.try saying something towards the opposite effect like,"all my women cant get enough of me"with a smile on your face,so the potentials know youre kidding but have a sense of humor...Ok,the pool boy is anxiously waiting for me so Im off like a prom dress...
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
licorice said:
Hey Jay,just be glad you havent witnesses my moves on the dance floor cause you boy would you be stalking me to no end,and you would be trading in the Depend diaper wearing,Metamucil drinking grandmas for the real deal..I find it very cute when someone can twist their insecurities around and say the exact opposite of what they believe to be true,such as me just alluding to being a great dancer(which is far from the truth),but all in a jokingly way to break the ice...e.g.-say you dont believe you have a way with women,etc.try saying something towards the opposite effect like,"all my women cant get enough of me"with a smile on your face,so the potentials know youre kidding but have a sense of humor...Ok,the pool boy is anxiously waiting for me so Im off like a prom dress...
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LMAO You know I'm falling in love with you, right? If this works out, my wish of one day kissing a girl on the lips might actually come true. I'm so excited! I can't wait to tell my mom about you.

And after listening to all your perverted sexual comments, I agree that we need to get a room asap. You're buyin, sugar mommy. Just make sure you ravish me quick and get me back home before curfew. :D
 
SalemEdgerton1

SalemEdgerton1

Well-known member
you guys should make a movie about this. She's shy, he's shy and they're getting together this SUMMER! Break the Ice, rated PG...13.
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
SalemEdgerton1 said:
you guys should make a movie about this. She's shy, he's shy and they're getting together this SUMMER! Break the Ice, rated PG...13.
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Lol I don't think that would work Salem, since neither of us are shy. Licorice is on this board because she developed feelings for a man with SA and wants to learn more about the condition and I'm a Life Coach who has gotten over his SA years ago and I'm here to offer my advice and help people out.

But we can cast YOU in this movie it you're up for it. :)
 
SalemEdgerton1

SalemEdgerton1

Well-known member
oh lol well yea I guess I could star in it...I am the 12 time Oscar winning actor who portrayed such characters as Lippy the Lemming with an alternate lifestyle and Geraldo Rappaccini the mysterious Italian exhibitionist after all :D. Now just have to find a female lead I guess...
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
SalemEdgerton1 said:
oh lol well yea I guess I could star in it...I am the 12 time Oscar winning actor who portrayed such characters as Lippy the Lemming with an alternate lifestyle and Geraldo Rappaccini the mysterious Italian exhibitionist after all :D. Now just have to find a female lead I guess...
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LOL I'm sure Licorice can pretend to be shy.
 
SalemEdgerton1

SalemEdgerton1

Well-known member
lol that works. You can get a random sex scene too if ya like with some other character...or licorice to create TENSION. Da da dum! Sorry, left the TV on yesterday and ended up watching soap operas for two hours.
 
Jay Cataldo

Jay Cataldo

Well-known member
SalemEdgerton1 said:
lol that works. You can get a random sex scene too if ya like with some other character...or licorice to create TENSION. Da da dum! Sorry, left the TV on yesterday and ended up watching soap operas for two hours.
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LMAO So THAT'S why people think you're gay. ::p:
 
SalemEdgerton1

SalemEdgerton1

Well-known member
lol well they have gripping intense plots what can i say? I have to get in touch with my feminine side once in a while that's why i watch soap opera and occasionally stare at my Gerard Butler poster on the wall.
 
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