Should I even be on this site?

[Lccska]

Hi. I have a serious question to ask. I'm a 50ish Mom with anxiety disorder and depression. I also have a daughter with the same. I found this site for her and I'm thrilled she realizes she isn't the only person with this disorder. My daughter is a member on this site. She knows I check in every once in a while. I read some of your posts and I so badly want to give words of encouragement, or tell you to "get over it" when it's needed, or give my advice on situations, etc. I'm a MOM 100% of the time. I even wrote a post on meeting women and got censored. That was EMBARRASSING! I have lived with anxiety my entire life. But I managed to get a College degree, marry (twice!),gave birth to 2 beautiful daughters (pregnancy exacerbated my anxiety into a full blown Major depression with a hospitalization), and have a successful career (though I'm currently unemployed due to avoidance personality disorder). I feel like I'm a wealth of knowledge on this "illness". And I call it an illness because anything that routinely disrupts your life is an illness.
Now for my question. Most of you are very young. Maybe you could use the wisdom of someone who has been there. Maybe you don't need another Mother. And I assure you I would approach most posts as your Mother. There doesn't seem to be many older women posting on this site, though I know there are a few. On the other hand, I want my Daughter to have a place to rant and rave about me. (She loves me with all her heart, but hates my guts. Imagine that!). I so badly want to reach out and give some of you hope, but I want my daughter to have her place too. I'd gladly lay down my life for her, as most Mom's would do. I know her well enough to know she would tell me to go ahead and "post away!". Is there room for both of us on here, or should I let this be her place? Be kind when you respond! I have feelings too! (Coyote cracks me up too).

 

[vexatiousmind]

I say yes : )

welcome to the forum

 

[coyote]

of course there's room for you here - space is virtual on the interwebs

besides, i think you offer a very valuable perspective to younger people who may think that their lives are always going to remain exactly how they are now

 

[pebblesdundee]

nobody belongs, but everyone's welcome.

So welcome to the site!

 

[Lccska]

I didn't really put 2 and 2 together until I was about 36. Believe it or not, I was a Psych Nurse for 17 years. I learned a lot about myself working on Psych. As I said, my pregnancies exacerbated my anxiety. I started having panic attacks. My world spiraled out of control for about 5 years until I had a Major depressive episode and ended up having shock treatments in the hospital. I had 2 young daughters. I don't know if I would have had the will to change and get better if it wasn't for them. I HAD to get better as I had my daughters to look after. They mean the world to me. I always knew I was different, but since I grew up in a big, chaotic, loving Family with an alcoholic Father, it was easy for me to get lost in the chaos.
I'm glad now that I didn't put it all together until I was older. I think I would have limited myself due to knowing I had an illness. You are not an illness, you have an illness!! Don't define your life by your illness and limitations. I still had the illness, I just didn't realize it. If you had Diabetes, you would treat it. Same thing with any anxiety/depressive order. I can't say it enuf. You need to control the illness, don't let it control you.

 

[Waybuloo]

I think your contributions to this site would be a breath of fresh air because of your perspective as a parent and as someone who has had a 'life' and experiences. If your daughter is ok with you coming here I don't see any reason why you shouldn't.

I see what you mean by your early ignorance actually benefiting you in terms of not stopping you from living life. I sometimes wish that I am able to kick myself up the backside harder because over thinking and avoidance makes the problem into a bigger one.

Personally, my mother was a **** parent and continues to deny any responsibility in my developing SA and other mental disorders. So I wouldn't mind having another virtual motherly voice

 

[superfluouslyme]

I'm sure your daughter doesn't mind one bit that you post on here...as long as you use proper grammar, of course. It's well known in many circles that some daughters are grammar Nazis and easily embarrassed when their parents cannot show computer literacy.

Welcome, lccska!

 

[pakistan]

wouldve quoted a yo mama joke to welcome you, but i think that wouldve come out as offensive

 

[TheSanctuarian]

I'm sure as a mother your views will be a little different to others on here, so it would be nice to see it from a mother perspective. as long as you don't virtually stalk your daughter (or anyone else for that matter ) there is no reason for you not to be a member of the same forum (I have my mum as a friend on Facebook, and that can get pretty personal sometimes)so welcome to the site!

 

[kilojoule]

If your daughter said she didn't mind then it seems you two have a good relationship with good communication. I'll bet she knows how lucky she has to have you. I think it's great to have a mothers point of view on things especially when you know what you're talking about. Sometimes my compass can be a little off and I'd give my right arm to know what my mother thought alas that isn't possible.

 

[panicsurvivor]

Of course you should be on. As long as you want to be, and you think it is positive to you and others, you should stay on.




P.S. I am thirty two by the way. So not everyone is that young.::

 

[Purplepixies]

I'm only 20! I am super glad you came to join us! I need someone ahead of the road to signal me once in a blue moon.