Saying "hi" is way too hard!

[gsmax5]

I'm sure a lot of people think I'm a big jerk because when people say "hello" to me when they're passing me in the hall, they rarely hear me say it back. I'm not a jerk though, I'm really not. It's just that saying greetings is PHYSICALLY difficult for me. I'm not afraid that people will criticize me for saying "hi" (that would just be silly), it's just that when I first start to say something, my voice is either WAY too high or (most of the time) way too low.

I usually say "hello" back to people when they say it to me, but I just (unintentionally) mumble it back.

Does anyone experience the same thing?

 

[Emily_G]

You could smile and wave?

I don't mind saying it back to someone...but I have a hard time initiating.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

Absolutely.

A lot of the time when I do say 'hi' back I'll basically mumble it. I don't mean to, it just happens that way.

Many times I've been griped at for not saying hi back (either right away or later on). And I'm sure I've been silently resented for it more than I've been griped at.

 

[Qbmaster]

I sometimes do the same thing. For me I think the reason is my introverted personality. People like me don't always realize that just because we can hear ourselves say "hello" clearly in our head, that doesn't mean that other people can hear it. I have had to practice actually saying the words that I hear in my head. The scary thing is that when you start hearing yourself it will probably sound really loud! Once you get used to it, though, you will have no problem controlling your voice

 

[BrokenSailor]

I have no problem with saying hello or responding to a "hello". It's when people say "whats up" to me and I just don't know what to say and I stand there like am idiot.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

With me it's like the problem is the surprise. Out of nowhere someone springs a "hi" on me and I'm not prepared for it.

Give me 5 minutes that you're going to say hi and I'll do fine.

Yeah.

At least I don't do that every single time.

 

[Psychedelicious]

Talking without speaking

Do you wave? Sometimes in loud places it's hard to hear, and even if it's not loud, well whatever. Waving atleast shows a response. And if you even move your lips without saying something, it's still like you tried. Waving is just as good as understanding because it gets the exact same point across. If you already do that I'm sure you're fine.

 

[Jin]

With me it's like the problem is the surprise. Out of nowhere someone springs a "hi" on me and I'm not prepared for it.

Give me 5 minutes that you're going to say hi and I'll do fine.
.

yeah...quick reaction time is needed in saying hi.... but sometimes i look like dumb... like patrick the starfish.... it takes about more than 5 mins.... even i want to say hi back.... i cant... something is trying to stop me from getting it done.....

 

[gsmax5]

It's when people say "whats up" to me and I just don't know what to say and I stand there like am idiot.

Oh my God, that is so true for me!! I always hear people respond by saying things like "nuttin' much dawg", "yo, wuttup mah man!", or they just start talking about how they just won the lottery. I usually just say something like "hi" back, but then I get really dirty looks as if I had just said the most offensive thing in the world.

 

[gsmax5]

yeah...quick reaction time is needed in saying hi.... but sometimes i look like dumb... like patrick the starfish.... it takes about more than 5 mins.... even i want to say hi back.... i cant... something is trying to stop me from getting it done.....

Same here. I hate passing someone in the hall and then realizing that he/she said "hi" and that I did not say "hi" back quick enough. People really get me by surprise.

 

[Qbmaster]

The key is to not have to react quickly. If you say hi first, there is nothing to react to.

 

[gsmax5]

And I'm sure I've been silently resented for it more than I've been griped at.

^The ****ty but true reality

 

[gsmax5]

The key is to not have to react quickly. If you say hi first, there is nothing to react to.

But what if the person I say "hi" to thinks I'm trying to "come onto him/her"? That's always a major reason I never initiate conversations.

 

[Qbmaster]

I rarely initiate conversations, but if you just say "hi" and keep walking, the risk of having to talk to the person is sufficiently low

 

[Shift]

I have that problem too... Especially when my neighbors say hi to me, I have a hard time speaking. My responses tend to be inaudible, so I usually only wave and not say anything.

 

[TheWall]

I always say "hi" way too quietly. Most of the time people can't hear me when I say it and walk right by me, which just makes me feel dumb.

 

[ou2saved2]

Yes, I did and sometimes still do. This is really a good question because sometimes we are mis understood. "We want to greet you but slow down" and it does'nt help if we don't know you too. Whenever I am at a point that I can't react to a quick and unexpected "Hi", I just smile and use the time to relax and swallow before I launch out a Hello.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

^^Are you good at the smiling thing, then?

99% of the time when someone I don't know smiles at me I can't manage a smile back. You'd think that would be instinctive.

 

[gsmax5]

ou2saved2, I wish I had the same smiling skills as you do. All my smiles look forced; except for the smiles I make before I laugh when something is really funny; my "happy" smiles look like crap. I look like Moe Szyslak when I smile.

 

[ou2saved2]

It takes practice. I do know that it helps me when I tell myself that the person saying Hi is more often than not thinking about other things other than me. S.P. or S.A. exists because we put too much thought into our reactions and mostly how others will think about our reactions. but remember feelings are not facts! people are mostly thinking of themselves.