Revival of pessimism

A friend

Well-known member
#1
Hello everyone, I've returned, although I wish this could be more positive.

The biggest issue I've been having for years was almost resolved, until I started learning more about it.

Getting a girlfriend/future wife seemed appealing to me, but now...after so many people have told me it's incredibly stressful, loads of work, and only makes life more difficult and an unhappy experience...I feel like avoiding it, again.

Yeah, I'm scared of the dating world. But that's primarily due to the possibility of getting hurt.

I've read and heard about people committing suicide because of this, meaning that heavy negative emotions can be generated from it.

Another thing about me, what can hurt most people would be amplified for me. Yeah...I'd appreciate it if I didn't have to spend the rest of my life being miserable.

So, what do you guys have to say about this? Are relationships and marriage not truly what the media and older generations portray it as?

Are relationships really that difficult? Are they so hard that they'd make 13 year olds have hair as grey as rain clouds in San Francisco?

I honestly don't think I can take that kind of punishment.
 

DeadmanWalking

Well-known member
#2
It all depends on who you end up with. Some can drive you up a wall, others can add some happiness and relief from the stress of your life, but no relationship is pain-free. There will always be problems and tribulations. What matters though is whether or not you or your partner will put your heads together to solve it or just butt heads.

Just "do your homework on them" and really see their good and bad before moving forward to the next stage.
 

A friend

Well-known member
#3
It all depends on who you end up with. Some can drive you up a wall, others can add some happiness and relief from the stress of your life, but no relationship is pain-free. There will always be problems and tribulations. What matters though is whether or not you or your partner will put your heads together to solve it or just butt heads.

Just "do your homework on them" and really see their good and bad before moving forward to the next stage.
I did not know that (or I forgot), and although I know for a fact that all women are different in so many ways, I still thought that the results would be the same in the aspect of stress, despite who I'd end up with.

Here's one fact though; at the current time, I'm not emotionally ready for this yet. Like a lot of people on this site, I'm still trying to tame my own emotions, and handle them. Which I'm having trouble doing right now.

-_-
 

Flowers-Of-Bloom

Well-known member
#4
To be honest I haven't had much experience when it comes to the dating world, but I will say this: If you already find it challenging to manage platonic relationships then you'll probably experience far more difficulty when managing romantic ones. Work on your coping strategies and self-regulation because I guarantee that there will be at least some emotional pain and perhaps even heart-break which could reduce you to a complete emotional wreck if you're not careful. Try not to get too attached too quickly and remain emotionally self-sufficient, but open (i.e. you want her, but you don't need her).
 
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