People laughing at me in college?

Alcos

Banned
Ok Im going to make this as simple as possible and before anyone reads this I thank you all for taking your time to read it and give me helpful advice.

So its my second year in college and alot of things happened here that drove me to a point of being sociophobic. There are people who will say I was paranoid, but I can recall at least 6 specific incidences here where I was 100% sure that random college kids that I dont even know laughed at me at very different events. I go to a relatively prestigious school named University of Washington where majority of students who apply have a 3.7 average gpa; this made me think that college people in this school would be more mature. Now the thing that drives me crazy is, is that people here seem 10x meaner than people in high school; this school is known for having a VERY FRIENDLY student body (I had no problem with anybody in high school and im not the type of guy who takes sh1t from people). I am pretty sure that I was dressed awkwardly during times I was laughed at, but I never imagined that people here had the immaturity and audacity to laugh directly at me considering their academic background. For example, I can recall times when a guy and a girl would be sitting in a bench and once the guy saw me he would whisper something to the girl and she would laugh out loud and when I look back they would both look straight at me as if to make it obvious that they are laughing at me.

My questions are:

1) My parents said that most students here are friendly and that they were just laughing about something that was trivial about me (ex. clothing, height [since im really tall], etc.). They told me that I was being too sensitive and if something was really wrong with me they wouldn't laugh at me like that. I do feel like they are right in a sense because I met really nice people in the campus. Do you agree with what my parents had to say?

2) I was also wondering if this was bullying. Now these incidences were ALL during separate times at different occasions. Since I go to a huge school, I never met the people who laughed at me again. I searched up the definition for bullying and it stated that bullying is a REPEATED form of abuse by the SAME group of people and this is not my case. Therefore, would you consider this harassment rather than bullying?

3) Most people say that when strangers laugh at you its a bad thing, but could it just be that Im a funny looking guy and they have nothing personal against me?

Please tell me what you think, this is driving me crazy
 
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joyce

Well-known member
maybe then like you and smile at you 0_o
But I think you should try your hardest and think in your mind that there not laughing at you but saying you rock please try this :)
 
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Anomaly

Well-known member
1) My parents said that most students here are friendly and that they were just laughing about something that was trivial about me (ex. clothing, height [since im really tall], etc.). They told me that I was being too sensitive and if something was really wrong with me they wouldn't laugh at me like that. I do feel like they are right in a sense because I met really nice people in the campus. Do you agree with what my parents had to say?

2) I was also wondering if this was bullying. Now these incidences were ALL during separate times at different occasions. Since I go to a huge school, I never met the people who laughed at me again. I searched up the definition for bullying and it stated that bullying is a REPEATED form of abuse by the SAME group of people and this is not my case. Therefore, would you consider this harassment rather than bullying?

3) Most people say that when strangers laugh at you its a bad thing, but could it just be that Im a funny looking guy and they have nothing personal against me?

1. I'm not sure whether it was trivial or not matters. What matters is how you take the incident -- what are the chances you'll ever see them again? Who are they to you in the scope of things?

2. I wouldn't consider that bullying, but I'm generally not one to be bothered by such things. If anyone wanted to cause me physical harm, I would take that seriously, otherwise, not really.

3. That may be true. The only reason this was brought up is they openly laughed -- would it have been the same thing if someone thought you were ridiculous but kept perfectly silent? They would think similar thoughts.
 
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Taydos

Member
Alco, I totally relate, although this tends to happen even in my neighbourhood, may one reason strong reason would be, Im hardly outside.

1. Last I told my parents about this, they reason much more like yours. But if they could see each moment... nonetheless, there's nothing to say on that part, they still love you.
2. Harassment? lol, pretty much, I tend to think some people enjoy picking on others, it keeps them alive, dont know, but you can never stop it, what you have to do is deal with you; when such an incidence meets up with you again, what options do you have to keep your mind away from it? If you can, always hang around friends.
3. It has nothing to do with how you look, wear or whatever, some people are just nasty. Ive learned not to even care about what these people do or think, as long as I pursue my academic performance. Sometime ago I had a chance to be in the same room with these haters, doing presentations, the quality they saw me perform left a huge impact on them, because i was the best.
 

StandingJelly

Well-known member
Put it simply. Not bullying :) Bullying is wayy serious.

When I was around 11 years old, I openly laughed at a strangers dog once, because it looked very interesting. The person imitated my laugh as in to take offense and I continued walking away silently with my head down. It had completely flipped over my emotions. It was only my brother that stayed behind and angrily retorted something like "Shut up. He wasn't even laughing at you."
The person was ~20 at the time, if I was to face the same situation with anyone else, they would actually appreciate that they got my attention and glad they have made my day.
Sorry, this probably does not apply to you at all, but a notion to just be aware of.

Being laughed at may not be a bad thing :)
 
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Illusions

Well-known member
Think of it like this; those people may not necessarily be laughing at you in a jeering kind of way. I've been guilty of laughing when I observe certain people in public with my friends, but it's usually when the person in question has a funny facial expression/when we think they look like someone we know, or a celebrity, etc.

Or, like someone has already mentioned, some people are plain nasty, so it's really best to just ignore them. :)
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
Laugh at yourself, laugh right back at them, laugh just for the sake of it, until tears run into your eyes.
 

StupidWiz

Well-known member
Just smile back at them, sometimes when people run out of things to talk they make a comment about things around them. Maybe that guy found you're perfect to break their awkward silence? Since they don't know you it mustn't be personal and no, I don't think it was bullying. Bullying is done repeatedly by the same individual to the same victim. You only met them once, maybe they only giggle for a moment and immediately forget about what's so funny about you, don't take it seriously.

I often look at this way : If ppl laugh at me, I'll be happy, at least I make someone happy through my flaws that they see in me. :)
 

The Nephilim

Well-known member
Ok Im going to make this as simple as possible and before anyone reads this I thank you all for taking your time to read it and give me helpful advice.

So its my second year in college and alot of things happened here that drove me to a point of being sociophobic. There are people who will say I was paranoid, but I can recall at least 6 specific incidences here where I was 100% sure that random college kids that I dont even know laughed at me at very different events. I go to a relatively prestigious school named University of Washington where majority of students who apply have a 3.7 average gpa; this made me think that college people in this school would be more mature. Now the thing that drives me crazy is, is that people here seem 10x meaner than people in high school; this school is known for having a VERY FRIENDLY student body (I had no problem with anybody in high school and im not the type of guy who takes sh1t from people). I am pretty sure that I was dressed awkwardly during times I was laughed at, but I never imagined that people here had the immaturity and audacity to laugh directly at me considering their academic background. For example, I can recall times when a guy and a girl would be sitting in a bench and once the guy saw me he would whisper something to the girl and she would laugh out loud and when I look back they would both look straight at me as if to make it obvious that they are laughing at me.

My questions are:

1) My parents said that most students here are friendly and that they were just laughing about something that was trivial about me (ex. clothing, height [since im really tall], etc.). They told me that I was being too sensitive and if something was really wrong with me they wouldn't laugh at me like that. I do feel like they are right in a sense because I met really nice people in the campus. Do you agree with what my parents had to say?

2) I was also wondering if this was bullying. Now these incidences were ALL during separate times at different occasions. Since I go to a huge school, I never met the people who laughed at me again. I searched up the definition for bullying and it stated that bullying is a REPEATED form of abuse by the SAME group of people and this is not my case. Therefore, would you consider this harassment rather than bullying?

3) Most people say that when strangers laugh at you its a bad thing, but could it just be that Im a funny looking guy and they have nothing personal against me?

Please tell me what you think, this is driving me crazy

That's a really hard situation, you could easily jump to conclusions about it, and like most at university, you want to feel some sort of acceptance (or at the very least not to be made a fool of). I think you should stand straight, smile at them and walk on.

Intelligence doesn't make people mature, I know some of the most childish, impractical, yet intelligent people.

I've been in similar situations before, In one particular situation, there was a girl I worked with that moved upstairs to work, everytime she came down with a group of her colleagues, she would look over at me and point and whisper, omg, I was so upset....anyway, I was talking to one of the guys who also worked upstairs and it turned out that they we all looking at me because I often had to call them, and had spoken to several of them, yet i'd never met them, and as it turns out, the girl I used to work with was pointing me out because they all thought I was ohh so friendly and great to deal with and really sweet etc, etc. Because I am so paranoid, I started to think the guy telling me was lying, but when I thought about it, I knew he wasn't that type of person.

Just goes to show sometimes, that we may actually have it wrong and our minds can really build it up and turn against us. My attitude has changed a lot in the last couple of months, now I have the dont give a beeeeeeppp attitude, it's much easier :)
 
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RaphialLee

Well-known member
People just never grow up the y do the same to me in trade trade school and the people here most of them are 40 years of age. Nah its not personal but they dont respect you either. if you get an advise text me something. I feel the same way people do that crap to me also.

the only advise people give me is that they dont mean it. if they didnt mean it they wouldnt do repeatedly like they do. it only take one time to start becoming paranoid. i have more to say . after schoo i going to post some more
 
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Chriiss

Well-known member
Hey Alcos...
I know how you feel about being tall... Because I'm tall too :D
I get a lot of comments about it. It does get you down. I get comments daily and I find there not even like harmful comments. People just say them to make other people laugh or think you don't mind. I'm very self concious about my appearence because of what people say. But I am getting better at taking these comments. You know when someone keeps telling you the same thing over and over again it just gets a bit boring.
I think you'll be OK Alcos :)
 

jus

Well-known member
You guys who are tall are lucky, seriously.
Im like 5'7, 5'6 if Im being honest.. :p
basicaly any girl who is 5'7+ is out of my league :(
 
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