my world is small

[Falkor]

Hello,

First off, english isn't my first language, so sorry if it sounds a bit silly.
I am going to write what's on my mind, it's gonna be a vent, because i'm feeling low.

My world is small ~

When I was 15 my SA has hit me, I couldn't even go to the mall, the stores, school, anything for that matter. I had this huge fear for 3 years, so I basically lost friends, i lost school, never had a job and I was only on the computer.

Now I'm 21 years old, and I still realize my world is small. I have no school. I have never had a job. And I wish I was more. I really hate this feeling and it drives me nuts. I want to have a goal, not wake up everyday late and have a pointless life. It's all because of the demon SOCIAL ANXIETY. and I can't take that no more. I really want to do more in life.

I did went to school again, for 2 years. between 15 and 21 years. But I didn't finish it because I got suicidal in 2013. But I did learn a lot at school, so I'm happy about that, though. I love learning. But now I'm kinda in the same sitaution as before, all though I do like going to the mall now, I am not afraid of leaving the house anymore. I managed to make a best friend in town, so It's getting a bit better.

But what should I do, to make my world less small? I still wake up late, I have nothing to go to, and It makes me miserable.

Any advice, and have people here been feeling the same?

Ugh I hate my english, hope it doesn't bother you all as much as it bothers myself.

X

 

[Graeme1988]

Ah can relate, Falkor. I'm in the same boat myself. Sorry to hear yer feelin' bad all the same. And sorry that ah can't really offer any real advice. Yer not alone, though.

And don't worry about yer English. It's fine from what I've read, especially for someone who doesn't have it as a first language. So don't hate on yerself for yer English not being perfect. As long as you get yer point across. That's all that matter, really. But then, listen to me, am a guy who writes in a mixed of ma native Scottish language/dialect & English on here.

So, technically speakin', English isn't ma first language either, darlin'.. :ironicsmile:

 

[Falkor]

So, technically speakin', English isn't ma first language either, darlin'.. :ironicsmile:

hahaha, thanks for yer response, bud!

So I'm not alone on this thing, stucked in a small world, i'm sorry to hear you have the same struggle, but i'm glad i'm not alienated, totally alone on this

 

[jaim38]

My world is small too. I am just as afraid of networking and meeting new people.

 

[neohorizon]

Hi man

I feel like you too, my life is working, studying and internet.

But I can give you one advice, try to wake up earlier!!! 2 or 3 hours of the morning make a huge difference on your day. When i used to wake up late (after midday) the entire day i felt tired and sad, i only was fine in the night when i used to play games till the late night. I was stuck on it, i didn't have strength to move on, i used insomnia as excuse for many things (like getting a job) Try to wake up earlier, you'll feel better about yourself and better trough the day.

I can tell, the first step for me get my job was stop sleeping so late.

And our world is not that small when we think on how many things we can BE or DO. Just this year i started working, did 6 months of Kung Fu (even went to a championship), started jogging, went to a dermatologist for my acne problem and did many other things... For 2014 i have other plans, like getting a driver's license (didnt get yet because of the SA) and do yoga. Just keep moving bro.

i think your English is better than mine \o/

 

[Bo592]

I managed to make a best friend in town, so It's getting a bit better.

I think you have a great start here what kind of things do you like to do with your friend. Having a good friend help put passion in your life.And you love to learn that is great also anything you have to do in life you have to learn how to first. I wish I could say that about myself for I am a slow learner.