my family just shout at me and accuse me of going on no matter what I say

[scarred4life]

And people just tell me to talk to them about how it upsets me but that just makes things 100 times worse and results to name calling and violence and the screaming and shouting scares me so much and when I tell them that there words are stop been a stupid ****bag ****in baby.
No advice what people give me is ever going to do any good.
I just write on sites like this in the hope that someone will be nice to and to find someone who goes through simular things to what I go through.

 

[mmmm]

Sorry. That sucks. No words of wisdom from me. I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in your situation.

 

[JamesSmith]

And people just tell me to talk to them about how it upsets me but that just makes things 100 times worse and results to name calling and violence and the screaming and shouting scares me so much and when I tell them that there words are stop been a stupid ****bag ****in baby.
No advice what people give me is ever going to do any good.
I just write on sites like this in the hope that someone will be nice to and to find someone who goes through simular things to what I go through.

I used to have this problem with my family. My mom was the worst with this, she would try to escalate things into an argument in seconds of starting a conversation with me. The older I got, the more I learned to stay calm and be humble, don't get so defensive.

It takes two people to make an argument. I noticed that when I kept my voice and body in the calm zone my mom didn't have a way to escalate things and would keep the conversation at a normal level where we could talk things out like human beings at a respectable tone. It's nearly impossible for them to argue and yell at someone that is calmly listening to what they say and agreeing or being understanding of what they are saying. Avoid anger and especially avoid letting out anger if it's there.

"An angry person shuts their eyes and opens their mouth."

 

[scarred4life]

my mum just turns it round on my and goes crying to the rest of the family saying I'm bullying her

 

[EscapeArtist]

my mum just turns it round on my and goes crying to the rest of the family saying I'm bullying her

Wow that's exactly like my mom! It's like if my pain hurts her at all, or hurts her even to know of, then I'm horrible for being in pain. Ha! Well you're not alone that's for sure. I'm sure emotional neglect has a place in how we developed... here. That doesn't mean that we should be placing blame, though. Once we're old enough to acknowledge what we need, we have the power to do something about it, and then I suppose the blame is squarely us. We can only learn to become a little more self-reliant, or less reliant on family... It's really hard though, I think a lot of us here can relate. You can speak, rant, voice anything here though, and we'll understand

 

[hoddesdon]

If there is violence involved then you should make it a police matter. Perversely, the mythology of the family can be used to get away with things.

 

[scarred4life]

I also hate how my family would just scoff at me and be angry with me and accuse me of talking **** if they knew I say that I'm scarred for life.

Even though I'am an adult I rely on my parents alot because I only have one friend who I don't get to see much and I don't have a boyfriend or anything. And I also have alot of problems.

 

[RhoadsLynch]

I also hate how my family would just scoff at me and be angry with me and accuse me of talking **** if they knew I say that I'm scarred for life.

Even though I'am an adult I rely on my parents alot because I only have one friend who I don't get to see much and I don't have a boyfriend or anything. And I also have alot of problems.

I have been there Scarred, it is a horrible and lonely feeling when you fight with family and have seemingly no one else to turn to. I can remember nights alone at my apartment with darkness setting in, feeling totally and utterly alone. Sometimes it feels like you can lose your mind with panic and worry. i turned to music and video games that got me through some unbearable nights. I was okay in the daytime, but once I had to lay down at night for bed? My mind races out of control. Fighting with family sucks, especially when they know that.

 

[scarred4life]

My dreams are the thing that has kept me alive all these years through bullying and arguments.

And also books, music and TV has as well.

This may sound sad but I'm a huge Tracy Beaker fan.

 

[Young sad and blue]

I wish I could vent to my parents without a tacky reaction from them afterwards.

 

[danstelter]

I think everyone on this site has experienced that to some degree. I didn't get that kind of torment from my family, however, I did get bullied and got that kind of crap thrown at me.

It's never a wonder that you, I, or anyone else on this website has SA. It's possible to get by - it just takes a lot of hard work, and sometimes you have to make tough decisions like limiting contact with your family members.

 

[scarred4life]

My family also don't care about weather I get diagnosed with my problems or not and my mum just gets angry when I talk to her about it.
I hate how I have to do everything myself while everyone else with my problems gets loads of help

 

[JamesSmith]

My family also don't care about weather I get diagnosed with my problems or not and my mum just gets angry when I talk to her about it.
I hate how I have to do everything myself while everyone else with my problems gets loads of help

If it helps any I've had at least 5 counselors, tried 6 different medications, read anxiety self-help books and I'm in a worse position now than I was before.

 

[scarred4life]

all therapy did was work my head and now my sister is on at me to go back into and thats it's just my negative thinking thats made me think like this

 

[Falkor]

You might go meet some people outside? Go join a social activity involved with other people? Or you maybe could be moving out, to not rely on your parents and have your own space, to not be in sorrow about your parents reactions, cuz they won't be faced to your probs and you can go your way
I know it's hard when parents react like that, and it's hard to feel lonely, in the past i used to have only 1 friend. But now I do have some friends, but I only see them very often. :: I don't really have someone close to talk about everything as in a friendship. But i do have some ''fun time'' friends, just to do some activity. But still I miss it too, to have a friend to talk about everything ::
Your definetely not alone, I see a lot of people across this site who are in the same state, some even have zero friends. It's hard to not have someone around to help you out which could even help you more. But hey, the step is getting out of your safety zone and meet people out there. ''Luck is in your own hands''

Good luck!