My addiction

Boby

Boby

Well-known member
Warning,boring rant!
A few weeks ago I saw a documentary on Discovery Channel about drug addiction.They were presenting the case of a man from UK (I think), he was addicted to a synthetic drug (don't remember the name) that over time it will affect the urinary bladder ,in a very bad way.
So this guy was using this drug every day,after a while he was urinating blood and with extreme pain but he just couldn't stop using the drug.He eventually ended up in the hospital ,but the doctor's couldn't do anything to save his bladder and they removed it and tried to reconstruct it from a piece of his intestine.But what really shocked me was still to come ,after he got out from hospital with he's health severely damaged he admitted that he had only one thing in his mind,that's right the drug and he even bought and used some.When I saw and heard that I couldn't believe/understand why would a man go trow so much just to get something that was obviously hurting him.
I was quick to judge that man but now I kinda understand why he did it because I'm addicted too,not to drugs but instead I'm addicted to my bad habits,I'm addicted to not doing the things I'm supposed to do,I'm addicted to not respecting the promises I made to myself.
For me there is always a "maybe tomorrow","not now","I don't feel like doing it","I'm not in the mood" even though I know I will get in trouble or it will affect my life in a bad way if I don't do that thing.I feel like I'm completely irresponsible about my actions or lack of actions sometimes just like that drug-junkie I talk about.
 
MollyBeGood

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
wow, that's really a good point.. and seeing as I suffer from the same lack of motivation to change my thinking patterns to improve my life it does seem not too much different than the drug user who harms himself and doesn't care. You really have made me think, thanks. It's like I am kinda proud of myself I am not addicted to anything (i use weed and alcohol, but I do moderate) but my negative thinking and inability to motivate myself for the better is just as harmful to my life in the scheme of things as using heroin or meth-least they are having fun getting high...I am not even getting a buzz.
 
Section_31

Section_31

Well-known member
I too have this same problem, and its extremely difficult to break that cycle.

Its good that we notice it though :). It shows we want to grow as inidviduals.
 
gustavofring

gustavofring

Well-known member
Very interesting observations.

I too think I was/maybe still am addicted to not taking action and dwelling in the situation/thoughts. I recognize the "not now", "it'll come tomorrow" and putting things off eternally.

But I have taken some positive action. It's not easy to come out of depression. It calls upon everything in you to take responsibility for yourself and doing it NOW, not coming up with excuses why today isn't the day to take steps.
 
Gaucho

Gaucho

Well-known member
hi boby.

yea, if someone is addicted,they do it, because they are unable to resist, involuntary, its just impossible.

i can spend my entire day in a room doing nothing!!and wouldn't notice the day goes by, happens many times. then the guilt comes of thinking how many things i should of done.

but i think what you stated as your addictions, aren't addictions, just bad habits, what is also very difficult to pass, but the brain doesn't respond to them as the addictions does.

edit: btw i was eating cereals, and nearly had to stop when i started reading your post :)
 
Boby

Boby

Well-known member
Gaucho said:
edit: btw i was eating cereals, and nearly had to stop when i started reading your post :)
Click to expand...

Hi Gaucho ,
and sorry I had to ruin your breakfast :).
Yeah of course for the brain a drug addiction and bad habits/lack of motivation are very different things but kinda similar at the exterior.
For example I had decided to do exercises every evening (5 x 30 pushups,5 x 30 squats and 5 x 30 crunches).I did it for 3 weeks but for the last 2-3 days I didn't do anything because "I was not in the mood" even though I knew I'm not doing a good think by giving up and there was a real battle inside me but the lazy/comfortable me has win again.
 
silveraks13

silveraks13

Active member
What a relief this thread was posted!!

I do the same thing everyday! I have even written a list of things I "should" do in a day to make me a "normal, contributing" person. And every morning, I wake up feeling like sh*t, and start my bad habits all over again. And every afternoon, I beat myself up for not doing the things I said I would...how hard would it be to go for a walk with my daughter or read a book? And finally every evening, I have the discussion with myself that tomorrow is the day. It is an awful cycle that I don't know how I got myself into it. Will "tomorrow" ever come????
 
Gaucho

Gaucho

Well-known member
gustavofring said:
I think the more you tell yourself you HAVE to do something, the bigger the resistance.

I find this Eckhart tolle's advice useful:
The Wisdom of Surrender - Eckhart Tolle - YouTube
Click to expand...

hi, Gustav, the other day i bought a eckart tolle book, i think the title in english is :"NOW". i got interested to him because of your posts about him:).
after reading how life can be, 99,9999999999999% of the human beings in society and in history had a miserable life
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top