Music: My #1 Drug

[lonely_drummer]

It's hard, walking down the street, eating at school, public speaking, making eye contact or just meeting someone new. Simple, everyday tasks are chores. There's only one social behavior I can actually conquer and that's playing live shows with my band. I can't do basic things like going to class without the fear of having to talk to someone, but then I can step on stage and nobody in the crowd exists, none of their glaring eyes or judgmental thoughts piercing through my skin. Music is a powerful and beautiful force. I could not survive without it. It is my fuel. Whenever I go see my friends, I have to listen to my Ipod on low so I can hear the music and listen to my friends at the same time. It soothes me and helps me relax because I feel this anxiety even around my closest friends. I absolutely love music, it keeps me moving forward, waiting, for something new exciting. Does music have this effect on you? Did it save your life like it saved mine?

 

[Eilonwy]

first of all, that whole paragraph was just amazing lol. i think the mere fact that those two major aspects of your life are such extremes shows just to what extent music is so powerfully healing for you - i mean, standing on a stage playing music is the entire opposite of everything else about your life as you describe it. i think that is really amazing and really good for you to be involved in a band and in music, by which at least you're experiencing a part of life that is not dominated by anxiety.

i would probably have to say the same except that i still dont think i would be able to stand up on a stage without freaking out lol. i dont think music really relievess my anxiety but it really helps me to just kind of fade away into another world where none of the things that go wrong/can go wrong matter, just for a while, you know? to me its like a whole surreal uplifting world by itself.

 

[lonely_drummer]

See, that's how it starts. You sink into the world that the music creates and its almost like a shield. Also very uplifting like you said, almost like a high that protects you. And your emotions during these times will dictate which genres you're most likely to listen to. Its so easy to connect with music that can be helpful through hard times. It doesn't matter you if can't get on stage, you're still connected to the music somehow by listening and enjoying it. For a true musician to pull a successful show, you have to feel the balance of the energy between the band and the crowd. Both energies have to feed off eachother and you can notice that at really good shows and then the music is in the air, bouncing around and its just air, not written down, not drawn in symbols, but heard, through the air and its like everyones apart of the music. Its great, but I'm jabbering, so yeah, Music kicks ass and helps out a lot too