looking at me because I'm awkward?

[chev]

I just recently was in a situation in which I was forced into a group discussion. My anxiety was terribly high, because it felt so much like being back in school. Anyway, there was a guy who kept looking at me. Before I noticed this, he had commented on how quiet I was being. I felt so frustrated with myself afterwards. Anyway, I got so self-conscious. When I noticed him looking at me several times, I figured it must've been because he thought I was extremely awkward and weird. I talked to my sister about it, and she said she didn't think that would've meant that. But why else would he have been looking at me? He had already made a comment about me being quiet, so he must've been looking at me to figure out why I was so weirdly quiet and awkward.

Also, anyone else get self-conscious when they realize someone is looking at them? Do you guys always assume the same thing as I do?

 

[dannyboy65]

I hate when people look at me also, mainly cause I don't feel confident with my appearance. But you never know maybe you being quiet was a compliment it's not always bad to be an introvert.

 

[chev]

I hate when people look at me also, mainly cause I don't feel confident with my appearance. But you never know maybe you being quiet was a compliment it's not always bad to be an introvert.

I'd like to think that. Some of the people were interrupting each other. I just usually assume that people don't like me for being quiet, because not very many people are as quiet as I am.

 

[dannyboy65]

I'd like to think that. Some of the people were interrupting each other. I just usually assume that people don't like me for being quiet, because not very many people are as quiet as I am.

That's not bad some people prefer quiet people I know I do. I don't think you have to worry about it. :thumbup:

 

[Megaten]

Yeah I actually had something similar to that earlier today. I especially hate when that person feels the need to draw more attention my way by commenting on it.

 

[voodoochild16]

I just recently was in a situation in which I was forced into a group discussion. My anxiety was terribly high, because it felt so much like being back in school. Anyway, there was a guy who kept looking at me. Before I noticed this, he had commented on how quiet I was being. I felt so frustrated with myself afterwards. Anyway, I got so self-conscious. When I noticed him looking at me several times, I figured it must've been because he thought I was extremely awkward and weird. I talked to my sister about it, and she said she didn't think that would've meant that. But why else would he have been looking at me? He had already made a comment about me being quiet, so he must've been looking at me to figure out why I was so weirdly quiet and awkward.

Also, anyone else get self-conscious when they realize someone is looking at them? Do you guys always assume the same thing as I do?

Yeah **** him, he just doesn't understand. If you don't plan on attending the group anymore one day just punch him in the face and walk out.

 

[NaomiV]

Maybe he finds you attractive or interesting and that's why he was looking at you. Or it could be that he was relieved to see someone in the group who wasn't being rude and interrupting people. Also, he might have felt the need to let you know that you were noticed and that not everyone was ignoring you. It doesn't always mean something bad when a person stares. I know its awkward and I dislike it very much when people stare, but it doesn't mean they do it for a negative reason. Try to teach your brain to think positively about things more often.
Also, maybe he wanted to start a conversation with you, but wasn't sure how.

 

[FriendlyShadow]

I just recently was in a situation in which I was forced into a group discussion. My anxiety was terribly high, because it felt so much like being back in school. Anyway, there was a guy who kept looking at me. Before I noticed this, he had commented on how quiet I was being. I felt so frustrated with myself afterwards. Anyway, I got so self-conscious. When I noticed him looking at me several times, I figured it must've been because he thought I was extremely awkward and weird. I talked to my sister about it, and she said she didn't think that would've meant that. But why else would he have been looking at me? He had already made a comment about me being quiet, so he must've been looking at me to figure out why I was so weirdly quiet and awkward.

Also, anyone else get self-conscious when they realize someone is looking at them? Do you guys always assume the same thing as I do?

Actually, this happens to me quite a lot unfortunately :/. It's not just with adults, but teenagers/kids whenever I walk pass by them, and they give me this three or five minute stare which makes me utterly uncomfortable in the situation. I'll just stand there and let them stare at me, because I know I can do nothing about it and nothing to stop them in that moment. I personally dislike people staring at me, but it's funny that if I stare back at them (and this has happened) then they go "What?" in a really rude tone of voice. I guess it's a lose-lose situation.

 

[chev]

Maybe he finds you attractive or interesting and that's why he was looking at you. Or it could be that he was relieved to see someone in the group who wasn't being rude and interrupting people. Also, he might have felt the need to let you know that you were noticed and that not everyone was ignoring you. It doesn't always mean something bad when a person stares. I know its awkward and I dislike it very much when people stare, but it doesn't mean they do it for a negative reason. Try to teach your brain to think positively about things more often.
Also, maybe he wanted to start a conversation with you, but wasn't sure how.

Thanks. I need to remind myself to do as you said. I always assume the worst. I also neglect to think about how I perceive others. I've looked at others who seemed/acted quiet like me, but I didn't think they were awkward. If I see someone who isn't talking much, sometimes I'm thinking, "I know how it feels. How can I try to help make this person feel better, since I know what it's like?"

 

[chev]

Actually, this happens to me quite a lot unfortunately :/. It's not just with adults, but teenagers/kids whenever I walk pass by them, and they give me this three or five minute stare which makes me utterly uncomfortable in the situation. I'll just stand there and let them stare at me, because I know I can do nothing about it and nothing to stop them in that moment. I personally dislike people staring at me, but it's funny that if I stare back at them (and this has happened) then they go "What?" in a really rude tone of voice. I guess it's a lose-lose situation.

I think I've only tried staring back at people maybe a few times. It did seem to make the person stop.

 

[chev]

Yeah **** him, he just doesn't understand. If you don't plan on attending the group anymore one day just punch him in the face and walk out.

This was a one-time (or at least for now) thing that I was required to do, so yeah, I won't have to be in that same group again. I don't think he was trying to be a ****, but I still was just worrying that he thought I was awkward. I just need to brush things off and not over-analyze things so much.