Longest time in a relationship without sex?

[LoyalXenite]

Just wondering what the longest you've gone in a relationship without sex? (when its been a sexual relationship prior)

Feeling very rejected by my partner at the moment, we've both put on weight and I know it makes her feel self conscious, plus her meds have really killed her sex drive. Long story short its been 5 months without sex, and it was only coz it was my birthday, prior to that it was probably valentines, it had been pretty rare for some time really. At this point I don't expect it until her birthday, or maybe Xmas.

While I don't want her to feel pressured at all I've been feeling incredibly rejected and unattractive. Just wondering if anyone else had gone through something similar?

 

[Odo]

Ouch.

I can't say I've experienced this, but it would definitely mean the end of the relationship for me.

5 months is way too long... you've got to confront her about this.

Obviously she's not required to have sex with you, but if you feel like you need more out of this relationship than you're getting, then she needs to compromise (and not just 'let' you have sex with her, which is actually worse) or let you go.

I don't know if I'm a **** for saying that, but the thought of living in that kind of situation seems hellish.

 

[LoyalXenite]

I do want to talk to her about it but I dont want her to feel pressured or get defensive or hurt or anything.

So I dont know how to go about it, her birthday is coming up in two weeks, so maybe something will happen then.

But its 5 and a half months now and its really starting to bother me, I cant help but feel very unwanted right now.

 

[LoyalXenite]

6 months, her birthday is next weekend though, so I'm hopeful.

I tried to roughly broach the subject and she said she doesn't foresee it continuing like this, and things should go back to normal. Eventually. I just have to suffer the rejection and frustration for months at a time until it is fixed.

 

[cobalt_bluester]

For me it's been about 7 years which is totally ridiculous I know!!!

 

[LoyalXenite]

Well her birthday has come and gone and big surprise. Nothing has changed, still no action.

 

[LoyalXenite]

For me it's been about 7 years which is totally ridiculous I know!!!

While in the one relationship? How did you manage to deal with that, its been 6 months for me and its killing me.

 

[D3adInsid3]

I know exactly how you feel. My bf started taking meds for his back. it started out the pain kept him from wanting me, then it was like once a month. then we went to every 3 months. I keep thinking its me, Im so ugly he doesnt want me. I'm not good enough. But he says he loves me and he gets jealous all the time. And when we are together its intense, he seems to still want me. But All im thinking is now i have to wait another 4 months before you come near me again. and its not just sex, he doesnt kiss me, he doesnt hug me. sometimes he holds my hand, or maybe he feels he has to. It really does make you feel so horrible and rejected. Its messing with my head, sitting here watching him, wanting him, im not allowed to touch him. I feel like i cant ever kiss anyone again unless they kiss me, like i have to have permission to kiss. He told me recently after another fight about him not wanting me anymore ( I thought maybe hes cheating) He said It doesnt work anymore. He wont talk to the doctor hes to shy about it. I think i believe him but with all the lies ive been through in my life my head wants me to believe its me. Maybe hes just saying that to make me leave him alone idk. But I feel your pain, I have toys but would it kill him to hug me. He walks by me and i get excited lol We were like rabbits before. To go from every room, to once a year is torture. He told his friend right in front of me that hes not losing his medicine over me. I drink alot more now and read, stare at the wall lol im pathetic.

 

[Agent_Violet]

The longest was several months and it ended in divorce. It wasn't a good relationship anyway and the lack of physical intimacy and that connection just made it worse.
Currently the longest we've gone is 2 weeks and that's just because we were both fighting the flu and brutal sinus issues.
Meds can really mess up a person's drive but the key is you have to be willing to let your partner try to get you in the mood for sex. If you aren't open to even attempting to let them try to help you feel sexy,then your relationship is in trouble.