Long time sufferer

maryram13

maryram13

Member
I have been suffering from Social Phobia for as long as I remember. I just recently was able to add up all the symptoms and call it something. Here are some of the things I suffer from most frequently:

* I constantly worry about what I say in public, and often think things to myself and never voice them, because I'm worried what people will think of me
* I do not like being the center of attention under any circumstances, including my wedding. Luckily, my flower girl loves attention, and was able to hog some away from me.
* I CONSTANTLY feel guilty about everything. A while back, I hung out with a guy friend of mine a few times. I knew he had a crush on me, but I figured it would still be OK to hang out, since I didn't have one on him. When my boyfriend (now my husband), found out, he freaked. Granted, his best friend had just committed suicide, and he was uptight about that. He later apologized profusely to me for yelling, saying that he shouldn't have. Even though he has apologized, said that he shouldn't have gotten mad at me, and other people don't see what the big deal is, I STILL FEEL GUILTY ABOUT THE ENTIRE SITUATION! I feel like I put our relationship on the line, came close to cheating, even though, logically, I know that's not the case.
* The only time I have felt really good about myself has been with my job. Unfortunately, after my husband and I got married, we found out we were being relocated to a new state for his job (mandatory move). I had to leave mine, and I'm currently looking for another. This, however, requires me to get certified in my profession in this new state, jump through hoops, etc. We just got to the new place, and I'm already feeling depressed with my job. I am a busy body, and when I don't work, I worry. Also, there is the added bonus that I know I'm going to have to meet, and impress, new people, once I get a job. Not looking forward to that.
* Like most women, I constantly feel ugly. I am 25, and suffer from some hormonal acne. It makes me shy away from people even more.

I'm hoping this site will help me battle some demons. I can't really afford therapy right now, so whatever anyone can say that will help me through this rough time...please send it my way!

Thanks in advance,
maryram13
 
maryram13

maryram13

Member
trust me, it has been tried. it's hormonal, and so birth control is the only thing that would help, but the specific type i'm on does not help. i can't be on any other type.
 
Xervello

Xervello

Well-known member
The important thing, mary, is to not regress. Though the least stressing thing would be to hole up in your house and not deal with all your anxieties, it's good that you've done what you have so far. It's brave. Take it from a self-professed coward, lol. Unfortunately, it's probably always gonna suck to some extent, but as long as you keep being active socially via a job, family and friends, etc, you might find yourself a manageable balance.

Btw, I'm 36 and still suffer from acne. It is indeed hormonal. Some of us just never catch any breaks, lol. My SA is also very severe. So take my word for it that you should avoid any impulse to regress any further than you have. Lean on your husband, friends, and hopefully this community as much as you need. We're glad to have you here. Hope we can help. :)
 
J

jaim38

Well-known member
maryram13 said:
trust me, it has been tried. it's hormonal, and so birth control is the only thing that would help, but the specific type i'm on does not help. i can't be on any other type.
Click to expand...

Have you tried baking soda? I heard it helps some people. I also get acne during certain times of the month due to the menstrual cycle. There's not much I can do about it except try to keep my face clean and dry.

I worry about what I say in public too. Sometimes I end up saying the wrong thing which offended people, so I'm more cautious now.
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
I've been suffering from life for 50 years now. Sometimes it isn't such a bad disease.
 
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