Life_sucks
New member
OK!!
Well, Like the title, I feel that my life sucks. I moved from another country, when I was in high school. My English was- and is- terrible. The first day of the High school was the begining of my darkend days. I try to talk to other people ( Well I was thinking inside Lets talk), but I could not even make the very first step: saying "Hi". Whenever I open my mouth to say "HI", without any warning, my mouth is muted. And my brain will revolve around only one thing: What would that person will think about me? Is he/she going to say any thing funny about me? Or is he/she going to ignore me? This all the fear.
Like this way, I could not find any friends. Three years passed.
If you check my MSN, You can just count with your fingers, the number of contacts. Same applies to Facebook and etc.. Even If i have some one, I just feel like what would they say, if I talked to them.
I never had a girlfriend( hahaha this funny bcuz, I never talked to girl as even just a friend). If I am talking to a girl then, it will be just saying "Yes" or "No" to the counter girl. I try to eye-contact with the girl I like,but I just feel like, they will ignore me, so I just watch staight, even though I would like to gaze upon them.
I am a F***ing wierdo I guess. When ever I loggen in my facebook, I always try to go to others page and look at the photoes. I look at how happy are they in parties and other social events. I always feel jealous and wished I can be there too.
I am ugly as F***.
I am terrible at people skills.
Even simple smile gives shock to other people ( My teeth are Horrible).
My hair is curly and ugly.
I have pimples everywhere.
If i see a pretty girl at a distance, I always hide my self.
I am realy ashamed of my self. Even to talk to my room mates.
I feel like I want to kill my self. But I dun even have guts to do that.
Even rite now I fear, how many people even look at this post.
Any body can you give me little bit of hope? Please. : :
:
Well, Like the title, I feel that my life sucks. I moved from another country, when I was in high school. My English was- and is- terrible. The first day of the High school was the begining of my darkend days. I try to talk to other people ( Well I was thinking inside Lets talk), but I could not even make the very first step: saying "Hi". Whenever I open my mouth to say "HI", without any warning, my mouth is muted. And my brain will revolve around only one thing: What would that person will think about me? Is he/she going to say any thing funny about me? Or is he/she going to ignore me? This all the fear.
Like this way, I could not find any friends. Three years passed.
If you check my MSN, You can just count with your fingers, the number of contacts. Same applies to Facebook and etc.. Even If i have some one, I just feel like what would they say, if I talked to them.
I never had a girlfriend( hahaha this funny bcuz, I never talked to girl as even just a friend). If I am talking to a girl then, it will be just saying "Yes" or "No" to the counter girl. I try to eye-contact with the girl I like,but I just feel like, they will ignore me, so I just watch staight, even though I would like to gaze upon them.
I am a F***ing wierdo I guess. When ever I loggen in my facebook, I always try to go to others page and look at the photoes. I look at how happy are they in parties and other social events. I always feel jealous and wished I can be there too.
I am ugly as F***.
I am terrible at people skills.
Even simple smile gives shock to other people ( My teeth are Horrible).
My hair is curly and ugly.
I have pimples everywhere.
If i see a pretty girl at a distance, I always hide my self.
I am realy ashamed of my self. Even to talk to my room mates.
I feel like I want to kill my self. But I dun even have guts to do that.
Even rite now I fear, how many people even look at this post.
Any body can you give me little bit of hope? Please. : :