I've lost all hope

SAM2011

Banned
Is that you in your picture? Don't give up. U have a lot to look forward too even if your not thinking like that now. Things will come your way. If you ever need someone to talk to, well I am here :) You are not a loner either.
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
I think it is possible to look at the Christmases other people spend with rose coloured glasses.

This is my memory of Christmas. Of course I remember great Christmases with my parents and I miss them.

I also remember Chistmases where there was full on family conflict and huge fights and swearing between my siblings and in laws.

I also remember travelling all Christmas Day to my relatives, waiting for taxis because we didn't have a car, and sometimes not getting home until after midnight.

It's really east to think that life must be greener for other people, but it isn't the case. For the first time in my life I spent Christmas alone, it was peaceful. My preference would be to spend it with my parents if they were still alive.
 

live

Active member
recluse, I can completely agree with the constant thinking that you talk about. I used to think that I was just really good at analyzing things, but then I learned that it was more of an obsession that anything else. For me, it's like asking myself a million difference ways I should react to a certain situation, resulting in complete and udder indecisiveness. Is this what your thoughts are like? Mine drive me crazy.
 

live

Active member
and recluse, don't try to make sense out of why you think the way you do. It doesn't make any sense. Trust me, its not worth it. Just try to make positive steps, and stop thinking about WHY you think. Just think, but in the right way, haha
 

she1slander

Well-known member
One of the worst things i experience is being unable to stop thinking, i'm constantly thinking, trying to make sense of things and the way i am feeling.
Recluse, have you ever tried meditation? Just clearing your mind for a moment will help you to feel better. Trust me, it does wonders for your mind and your whole body. There are some really nice, relaxing music you can find on youtube.

I'm not going to suggest the things that have already been mentioned by previous posters here because a lot of those things would probably feel like A LOT of work for you, especially in such a depressive state. So I'm just going to be straightforward with you and suggest that you read and listen to some mind-altering advice from psychology experts.

Here's what I'd encourage you to do. I strongly and HIGHLY recommend that you read these 2 powerful and effective self-help books: The Fearless Mind: 5 Essential Steps to Higher Performance by Craig Manning and You can Be Happy No Matter What by Richard Carlson.

If you simply do not have the energy to go out of the house or do anything else while in the house other than be on your computer, I suggest that you do some reading. In this case, filling your mind with useful information on thinking habits and how it affects your entire mood and the motivation that comes with lifting them from a low state to a high state. Both of these books discuss the issues on the dangers of unhealthy, distorted thinking... an example would be, your original post. Also, you may think that you're "thinking" too much, when in fact, you're really just "worrying" too much. BIG difference, and the book called The Fearless Mind emphasizes on that concept. Believe me, if you take the time to learn of these topics, I'm sure that your mood will improve just a tad bit. 'Cause once you get the idea that how you feel is the result of what you're thinking about and how those thoughts really affect your actions, you'll be able to monitor yourself each time you start to feel negative, that you were probably thinking negatively.
 

schist

Well-known member
I don't believe in the sanctity of sex, and I consort with prostitutes quite often. Sex is just something I like doing, and just going to a brothel saves a lot of the effort needed to attract women (although it does impact on my wallet).

Having said that, if you believe that having sex/losing your virginity will cure all your SA worries, you really could not be further from the truth.
 

recluse

Well-known member
This is quite possibly the worst feeling in the whole entire world, as far as I'm concerned.

Are you an animal person? Many animal shelters allow visitors on holidays, since the animals get forgotten by the public. Or you could look into fostering a shelter animal during the holidays, which would provide companionship, and you'd be doing a great deed.

Yeah i like animals, especially cats.
 
I also hate this time of the year! Specially cause i've been loosing all the contact with family. My mother is living in another country and I dont talk with my father for years. I think we just need to live with what we have and try to get the best of it. Try to see the good thing on that, less parties less anxiety to deal on short-time. Use this last days for new years resolutions. Use all your energy to one thing that can change your entire life. And I think that thing is finding a job. No job, no money, be all the time at home...feeling bad to don't have job....Can't be worst thing. I'b been suffering for depression last years and I can tell you now, anxiety is a litle litle thing....comparing without work and the colateral damages of it!
 

recluse

Well-known member
I can relate to what you are saying Recluse. Being able to chat with someone, without difficulty, is a mystery to me. As i'm finding it difficult to help myself with SP, I don't think my advice would have much credibility to it. For what it's worth though, I would recommend you write down all of the things you want to achieve in life and work out how to accomplish them. If you are finding it difficult to start or maintain a conversation, why not try writing a generalized script for yourself. I would list all of your interests, ambitions and even amusing stories that have happened in your life. Then think of ways you could bring all of that into a conversation with someone. I would even say these things out loud to yourself, so that when you are talking with someone, it will sound natural and spontaneous to them.

Thanks. It's difficult as i have no goals in mind.
 

recluse

Well-known member
Is that you in your picture? Don't give up. U have a lot to look forward too even if your not thinking like that now. Things will come your way. If you ever need someone to talk to, well I am here :) You are not a loner either.

Hi, yes that's me. Thanks.
 

recluse

Well-known member
I think it is possible to look at the Christmases other people spend with rose coloured glasses.

This is my memory of Christmas. Of course I remember great Christmases with my parents and I miss them.

I also remember Chistmases where there was full on family conflict and huge fights and swearing between my siblings and in laws.

I also remember travelling all Christmas Day to my relatives, waiting for taxis because we didn't have a car, and sometimes not getting home until after midnight.

It's really east to think that life must be greener for other people, but it isn't the case. For the first time in my life I spent Christmas alone, it was peaceful. My preference would be to spend it with my parents if they were still alive.

I'm sorry. I sometimes wish i could be totally alone as my parents argue all the time.
 
Top