I've got the hots for my friend....Advice please!

[SlipStream7]

Its funny how advice is asked here, no one here is a professional. Plus not to mention topics like these are triggering to people and inappropriate for this site. People need to use discretion. Put it this way, you either get her or you dont. CHances are you wont. You should sink in the fact you dont own her so the chance of ever making her yours is small. I dont know why people fear this, because there can only be 2 outcomes. People sink in their emotions way too much on people who dont even love them.

Perhaps I didn't make it clear in the first post. The whole reason for the confusion was because during two semi-recent phone conversations with her, she was the first one to admit that she had feelings for me and wanted to pursue a relationship....and recently she said in an extremely passive tone that she had moved on....and yet still to this day comments on how I look sexy wearing certain things and the like. I never said I "owned" her, and I had no intention of "owning" her....in any case the issue is being resolved over time starting from this morning.

And yes, I'm a very defensive person. People need to be corrected when they misinterpret what I said.

-Slip

 

[Remus]

lol I was about to say that

I before E, Remus!

Yeah I'm dyslexic, ie ei always gets me

*throws guilt vibes at the mockers*

 

[agoraphobickatie]

hi slip ..i just read what you wrote to begin the thread and skipped what everyone else said, so if i'm just saying what you've already read, forgive me! lol...
anywho... sounds to me like she's a tease and just wants the attention from you to feel good.. if she really is 'bisexual', i find that most bisexuals are quite sexual anyway, haha.. and you guys have slept in the same teeny tiny bed 5-7 times? well.. if i wanted something to happen, we'd at LEAST be spooning or cuddling by the 1st or 2nd time, haha.. see what i'm sayin'? you might very well be someone she just wants to be friends with, she may not really be able to see herself with you intimately or relationship wise. i'm sorry if i'm giving pretty direct blows =/ lol, but just do your thing, it's not like you want to be fukked with mentally do you? haha.. if you'd like, just tell her your intentions and if she's not feeling the same then she should just be straight up with it and quit giving you any reason for false hope so that she can keep getting hers (hers being whatever attention she desires).
sorry for the shitty situation, bud.. chicks are bitches that way, i prefer to keep things real and up front, confusion is a bitch! haha..

 

[SlipStream7]

I agree with ya that by this point she would have initiated something sexual if it were meant to go that way. She definitely is an attention-seeker, although I'm not holding it against her. Last year she attempted suicide and after hospitalization she was put on the antidepressants. Ever since then sometimes she mentions killing herself in a...non-threatening way...but in more "you better appreciate me or I'll kill myself" way. Every day she constantly fishes for compliments about her body...even though she's extremely thin and gorgeous she continually says things like "I'm on the no-dinner-today diet because I'm so fat" and tries to get other people to tell her otherwise. I know this may not be a conscious attention-seeking effort, but I'm definitely seeing a trend here.

Like I said, I'm not saying that girls who need attention are "bad" or that it's a negative trait....but now I realize that I could never be with an attention seeker and it's helping me see that she's definitely not the one for me.

-Slip

 

[agoraphobickatie]

Like I said, I'm not saying that girls who need attention are "bad" or that it's a negative trait....but now I realize that I could never be with an attention seeker and it's helping me see that she's definitely not the one for me.

-Slip

awesome! i'm actually really glad you feel that way, it's very healthy! haha... and anyway, whether it's a bad trait or not, her needing constant compliments/attention is just insecurity/lack of self confidence.. and no relationship will ever work if you guys both aren't secure enough with yourselves.. you can't go into a relationship needing the other person to make you feel confident... there'd probably be hella jealousy issues anyway? who wants that!? haha.. best of luck to you slip!