"Introverted" People

[lilmutegirl]

So, I have encountered numerous people who identify themselves as "introverted" but I am inclined to disagree with their assessment based on their actions. I am hesitant to judge (and really, it doesn't matter or technically affect me that much, but it bugs me). The reason I find this irritating is because these people seem to thrive on social interaction (and I have seen them in different settings, so it is not specific to a certain type of socializing). They also dominate conversations, while actively trying to engage those around them. They could be very self-focused (hence the conversation dominating), but don't seem to fit the mold of an introvert. I find it hard to believe that I could be in the same category as these individuals, and find myself actively avoiding them even more than other people. Have you met anyone like this? What do you think of people labeling themselves as introvert/extroverts?

 

[bsammy]

When was I was growing up no one would come out and tell you they are introverted..honestly it would be weird if they did as I didn't even know what it was until my mid 20s..I guess these days it's different

 

[worrywort]

When I was growing up, if you'd asked me to name the most extroverted person I know, I'd have said my Auntie Debbie. She was really wild. We'd only really see her at Christmas and she'd come down in all her crazy, cyber punk, Camden market, designer gear and she'd always be the life of the party, very loud and talkative. But over the years as I've gotten to know her more, I've found that she's actually incredibly similar to me. She lives alone and spends most of her time alone. She doesn't like getting too close to people and is very independent. She's also pretty neurotic and has a lot of anxiety. It still seems weird for me to describe her as introverted because of how loud she is socially, but I wouldn't be surprised if she see's herself as an introvert because of how much time she chooses to spend alone.

 

[TheNomad]

Yeah, I agree with the opinions here. Some extroverts have some issues and insecurities of their own and sometimes say they are introverted when they fail. Maybe they really think being insecure in social situations means they are introverted, but it is not that. It doesn't bug me that much personally, though.

When was I was growing up no one would come out and tell you they are introverted..honestly it would be weird if they did as I didn't even know what it was until my mid 20s..I guess these days it's different

Yeah, thanks to the popularity of online personality tests.

 

[Requiescat]

You get two categories: Introvert and anti-social. Truly introverted people are often labelled, quite incorrectly, as anti-social. The behaviour of the people you described is clearly anti-social. If they are as you say, then it truly beggars belief that they could ever consider themselves as introvert. But being introvert doesn't necessarily mean that you are shy. You can be quite social in fact. Introversion is specifically someone who likes to spend time alone.

 

[this_portrait]

I found this while browsing around earlier: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-introverts-corner/200909/all-introversion-is-not-the-same

#4 is definitely relateable to me.

 

[kilojoule]

I find it hard to believe that I could be in the same category as these individuals, and find myself actively avoiding them even more than other people. Have you met anyone like this? What do you think of people labeling themselves as introvert/extroverts?

I think that people generally misunderstand the term 'introvert' and tie it in with other things. Lots of introverts are shy and have SA but you don't need to be shy or have SA to be an introvert.

I am an introvert, extreme introvert, I spend most my time alone and I happily go days without any interaction at all without noticing (see nobody, no phone, no email, no tv, no visits to this forum even basically no technology at all) I feel totally at ease when Im alone, I don't really get lonely and the isolation would not drive me mad, I need it.

However I am not shy and I don't suffer from SA. In fact most people who when they initially meet me probably assume Im an extrovert because I am a very bubbly person and I could talk to anyone.

 

[theslowesthand]

As a supposed introvert, I've always had this habit of behaving (temporarily) like an extrovert when in certain people situations. I put it down to a desperate attempt to get "my fill" (like feeding) of social interaction before returning to my usual life of dreadfully dull & un-stimulating aloneness. It's like i sometime "go crazy" with trying to be funny, interesting, personable, outrageous, "loud", inappropriate, etc. And of course its quite a bit worse with alcohol. Then afterwards (or even during) i resort to my usual unsocial, isolated state of being. As i said, i ragrd myself as an introvert, but MAYBE i could be an extrovert with very low self-confidence??? But, people drain me big-time, and only in isolation can i "recharge" & i need much alone time ... which is a symptom of being introverted. It's almost like i'm a frustrated extrovert. So I dunno WHAT i am! (as a "nice" woman once said to me, lol)

 

[MollyBeGood]

I am more introverted than you!

I feel a completion coming on....

I will win this one!

 

[BlazeBlue]

So, I have encountered numerous people who identify themselves as "introverted" but I am inclined to disagree with their assessment based on their actions. I am hesitant to judge (and really, it doesn't matter or technically affect me that much, but it bugs me). The reason I find this irritating is because these people seem to thrive on social interaction (and I have seen them in different settings, so it is not specific to a certain type of socializing). They also dominate conversations, while actively trying to engage those around them. They could be very self-focused (hence the conversation dominating), but don't seem to fit the mold of an introvert. I find it hard to believe that I could be in the same category as these individuals, and find myself actively avoiding them even more than other people. Have you met anyone like this? What do you think of people labeling themselves as introvert/extroverts?

Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introversion is a preferred state of living in which the person prefers peace and quietness. Introverts draw energy from within themselves to fuel their daily life. However, that doesn't mean an introvert is unable to interact with others, gather support, engage in conversations, or have fun at a party. It just means that they will enjoy it to the best they know and will go home to recharge when they feel tired. Introverts are normal human, they can be confident and opinionated and will take their stance if they think it's worth fighting for.

Shyness and social anxiety, on the other hand, are different. It means avoiding social interactions, being afraid to speak up, being anxious in group setting, etc. Both introverts and extroverts can experience shyness and anxiety. I hope this can somewhat help explain some of the behaviors you observed. Best wishes.

 

[lilmutegirl]

Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introversion is a preferred state of living in which the person prefers peace and quietness. Introverts draw energy from within themselves to fuel their daily life. However, that doesn't mean an introvert is unable to interact with others, gather support, engage in conversations, or have fun at a party. It just means that they will enjoy it to the best they know and will go home to recharge when they feel tired. Introverts are normal human, they can be confident and opinionated and will take their stance if they think it's worth fighting for.

Shyness and social anxiety, on the other hand, are different. It means avoiding social interactions, being afraid to speak up, being anxious in group setting, etc. Both introverts and extroverts can experience shyness and anxiety. I hope this can somewhat help explain some of the behaviors you observed. Best wishes.

I understand that someone being introverted does not equate to shyness or social anxiety (I personally feel like I have attributes of all three of these things, however, the shyness and anxiety are lessening).
The people I have seen appear to thrive on interacting with other people (and maybe I am misinterpreting things, as I obviously don't see them when they are alone), which seems more inline with extroverted features. These same people also tend to be loud and feel the need to dominate conversations/situations. They repeatedly mention being introverts (I don't feel the need to broadcast that I am an introvert multiple times in a conversation, personally). As with most things, I am skeptical of people who are compelled to tell others what they are like ("I am such a great person, I am really good at this skill", etc...)
One person whom I have encountered lately who identifies as an introvert talks a lot, but is very soft-spoken, and I am more inclined to believe that she is actually more introverted than the others, so maybe I am basing it on the volume of their voice.

 

[kilojoule]

I am more introverted than you!

I feel a completion coming on....

I will win this one!

Oh I don't know if this is because what I said. I'm sorry if I came off that way I certainly didn't mean it that way. I guess my use of the word 'extreme' could convey that but I was just trying to convey that I very much am an introvert in stark contrast to what someone meeting me for the first time might think.

 

[PugofCrydee]

**sings** "Introvert, extrovert, doesn't matter.."

Na I'm not from Perf..

 

[nicole1]

I feel like introversion is a fad these days. I still get ridiculed for being introverted, something that my psychologists have often called my behavior. People just claim it these days and I don't think they truly are.

 

[theslowesthand]

I feel like introversion is a fad these days. I still get ridiculed for being introverted, something that my psychologists have often called my behavior. People just claim it these days and I don't think they truly are

Some people probably like to "try it out" to see how much it fits who they truly (you know, trying to "find themselves"). Then if it doesn't suit, they give it up. :question:
True introversion isn't just a fad.

 

[theslowesthand]

Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introversion is a preferred state of living in which the person prefers peace and quietness. Introverts draw energy from within themselves to fuel their daily life ...
... Shyness and social anxiety, on the other hand, are different. It means avoiding social interactions, being afraid to speak up, being anxious in group setting, etc. Both introverts and extroverts can experience shyness and anxiety. I hope this can somewhat help explain some of the behaviors you observed

I avoid people for most of the time mainly due to i think my Introversion (ie still needing to recover my energy)
Then i avoid people due to my SA (eg if energy is back to ok)
My shyness varies, depending on the sitaution.
My avoidance (avpd) acts on the above urges/needs, & also i act as such due to habit (eg my isolated lifestyle is in a large part (maybe ~50%) to habit, which i rigidly stick to no matter what). Also fear of novelty, change, "loud" stuff plays a part. As well as a sprinkling of HSF (highly sensitive person) i think.
WHAT ELSE has he got?, you may be thinking, lol