I'm too shy with my family; What can I do?

[Kenn]

Hey guys.
As the title of my question suggests, I'm extremely shy when anyone of my family is around.
Towards them I'm just a completely different person!
I'll be 18 years old very soon, and I always thought this problem would go away when I grow up but it doesn't seem to change even a bit.

It's causing some really BIG problems:

I'm leaving a horrible horrible impression!
For example whenever I need to see a doctor (which will happen a day after tomorrow), my mom usually takes me (too busy to study for driver license), and I can't even say "Hello" (or even smile! I'm too shy to do that near my family too!) I'm just sitting there and shutting up until I must speak (like when someone ask me something).

At times I'm even seriously rude (a few time ago I met someone and my dad was there, and she said "Hey, nice to meet you", and I just stood there and said nothing!)

The list just keeps getting worse.. I can't let my family see me smile / laugh or even pet my own dog. I just have to hide and repress any display of affection towards ANYTHING!

Is this normal? what can I do about it?

 

[LifeInternal88]

Hi

I really don't know!
I have a similar problem but mostly with the adults in the family; I'm better (more free) around younger folks!

 

[WeirdyMcGee]

Well, they're probably used to it by now, I would think?
-- your family at least, I mean.
You should try speaking to them more often.
Think of it as practice for other people- professionals, co-workers, strangers, etc.

If you can't find words to say 'hello' back to someone, at least give them a nod to acknowledge them. Start with that. That's my advice.

 

[Helmaninquiel]

I used to be like that, around my Uncle. He would try and talk to me and I wouldn't give him the chance. I didn't like him though cause he wasn't a very nice person and he always had this ' I know everything, and I am everything personality' I hated it and I dislike that kind of person so I would just avoid him. and I also don't talk to my other aunts and uncles because they are also messed up, they abused my grandfather mentally for couple of years right in front of me but as for my mom well she is like me in the sense that she has more of a laid back personality, she is a nice person. me and her are pretty close. Did your family do anything when you were a kid or a teen that made you this distant from them?

 

[laure15]

In certain situations, I can be shy with my family too. For example, when I exercise, do yoga, or meditate, I become shy around them.

 

[hardy]

I feel ashamed to be with folks sometimes now and a lot in the past. I didn't have a goodwill towards them...there was too much fear,anxiety and ill-feeling. They(my mom n brother) did not accept my fears and i was unwilling to listen to their wishes.

I can say the only thing that is helping me is meditation. Meditation meaning observing the mind. Try googling Buddha's teaching if you are interested. He was the best scientist of the mind.

When we understand ourself through meditation, we can understand others too. Then the relationships blossom....understanding each other.