I'm almost 20 and have the responsibility of a 12 year old.

[Social_Monstrosity]

What happened to me? How did I slip so far like this? It's just so frustrating to think about...my fear binds me in place and I'm wasting my life away.

I don't know what to do guys. I'm sorry if this is a tritely made thread but I felt the need to post.

 

[Duraldo]

It happens, I was in the same spot as you when I was 19, so I decided to do add a responsibility of living with an addiction! (don't suggest you take this route). Be happy you DON'T have responsibility, which I am guessing is the case, not that you willingly thru away responsilbility (i.e. ignoring a child, child's mother, etc).

You could be like everyone else I knew at that age, already had one or two kids by that age, living day to day in a job they hate, with a girl that used to be good looking in highshool, but in a year 1/2 she has become disgusting (not ugly, just gross, like don't care about appearance).

My guess is people are pressuring you because you are living a life they can't, one free of their responsibility.

You want responsibility?

Fine, here, I'm going to make you responsible for getting a damn job and saving a million dollars, in one year. Go! That'll keep ya busy

Seriously, "responsibility" will come, and it will suck.

 

[Social_Monstrosity]

I suppose your post bares some degree of truth. But answer me this, without responsibility, how can I be respected and admired? Hell, even just ACCEPTANCE would be nice.

 

[Dayvan]

I understand COMPLETELY how you feel. There are times I feel like an articulate infant.

I'm 24, and although I do have a job and drive, I rarely do anything for myself. The thought of having a child or buying a house is mind-boggling to me. Even going to the grocery store isn't without a sense of trepidation.

This didn't start to be a big deal until around 18, 21, when you are expected to begin doing things for yourself. I feel way behind everyone else my age. I know I'm capable, but dealing with the anxiety is so exhausting, I'd rather just stay inside all day. It sucks, I know I shouldn't.

Good luck to you.

 

[slowmotiondaydream]

i'm in the same boat.. 24, the only responsibility i have it feeding my dog which is pretty cool for now but it'll just get alittle odd if i turn 30 and still find myself doing the same thing

 

[Deus_Ex_Lemur]

This has been one of the biggest issues for me last 3-4 years. Im 25, moved back home 3 years ago... NO responsibility. Last semester at school - I heh.

 

[ZaWarudo]

24 with not much going on. I occasionally speak with highschool 'friends' maybe once a year. They have children, families, their own apartment or even a house, and 50k+ salaries. Missing out on a certain sense of accomplishment doesn't really bother me at all. It's not really important how others see you either. With the responsibility of a 12 year old it's not just that others couldn't respect me; It's that I couldn't even respect myself. Then eventually one day low self-esteem changed to self-disgust/self-hatred. Any situation like that is dangerous.

 

[EscapeArtist]

No responsibility? I don't know about that. A person always has responsibilities. Main one: Take care of yourself. Even if a person doesn't have a job, lives with their parents, doesn't have a degree or even a high school education, but they take care of themselves physically, emotionally, or spiritually (if priority), they can be respected and admired. You can be the best you in any circumstance and that can be highly admirable.
Other responsibilities, taking care of family, pets, worldly issues. Doing your part in the little things. Planning a routine is a responsibility to yourself. Doing one thing every day at the same time.... I think trying to improve anything in any situation brings subtle responsibilities on it's own.
It's a matter of getting up and saying that you're worth prioritizing. Best of all, this can be done at any moment of your life.

(I kind of feel like I might have misunderstood the thread... Maybe. Hmm oh well hopefully this somehow fits into context)

 

[Aussie_Lad]

I suppose your post bares some degree of truth. But answer me this, without responsibility, how can I be respected and admired? Hell, even just ACCEPTANCE would be nice.

You are going about this the wrong way. Responsibility doesn't earn you those things that you are missing, there is a lot more to it than that. You get respected by being a good person, speaking kindly of others, putting other's needs before your own etc. The list goes on, you don't need to have a job, mortgage, live away from home and all those other things that a lot of people have. You simply need to be yourself and respect others, when you do this you will be respected yourself. Be aware though, even when people respect you, it doesn't necessarily mean that you will gain friendship or happiness from it because people often don't show in spoken word that they respect you or admire you even when they do.

 

[ZaWarudo]

(I kind of feel like I might have misunderstood the thread... Maybe. Hmm oh well hopefully this somehow fits into context)

Nope you've got it down perfectly. It takes kind hearted person and compassion to create positive messages like that. What you said is absolutely true too. The OP does need to understand he's worth taking care of himself in his own way. Your not alone in this S_M hang in there man.

 

[dottie]

if you want responsibilty so bad take responsibility and give yourself responsibilities... or something. seriously. take initiative, set goals. or maybe in reality you don't want responsibilities so bad after all.

 

[ZaWarudo]

errm what?
there's no way to judge a person when he only posted like two sentences.

Not everyone can relate I guess and that's perfectly fine too. Feel free to judge me though I don't mind. & I mean that for real. My last post is one those giant walls o' text trying to paint a picture of how it can sometimes emotionally feels like living that way. This is the blunt message-
Some people neglect their own health.

That's right. I'm talking about people cannot take care of their one and only responsibility. Taking care of themself. Being dependent and a leech can really emotionally hurt you in a bad way. Not just a sense of inadequacy and terrible esteem. The feelings of useless and hopeless can so easily spiral downwards to depression, self-injury, or suicidal ideation, whatever. If that's you- Seek help immediately. I'm not joking.

But if that's not you then please, please don't point out how rough the real life responsibilities are. Believe me everyone already knows that.