I'm a misanthrope

[Argamemnon]

I think I'm a misanthrope. I distrust people and humanity as a whole. I believe in the evilness of human beings. I have a massive shield that keeps people at a distance. But I also feel guilty because of this.

I'm convinced that I'm a much "better" person than most people. Does this sound arrogant, or do I come across as a narcissist? I'm sure there are other members here who feel the same...

 

[Day_Tripper]

Well I sort of have this superiority complex in my mind that I know is there to just make myself feel better, but I don't have a deep hatred or distrust of humanity as a whole. But when I see social people just laughing and knowing exactly what to say to each other all the time, it triggers some temporary hatred not aimed at anything specific, but I never intentionally distance myself from people. If I had a choice, I'd be a social person. But I just suck at BSing small talk.

 

[whocares]

I think I'm a misanthrope. I distrust people and humanity as a whole. I believe in the evilness of human beings. I have a massive shield that keeps people at a distance. But I also feel guilty because of this.

I'm convinced that I'm a much "better" person than most people. Does this sound arrogant, or do I come across as a narcissist? I'm sure there are other members here who feel the same...

I do. I too have the same conception of Humanity. However, i can't call myself a misanthrope, because i'm a social phobic, and these are two antithetical concepts. This is kinda tricky, i'll try to explain the better i can since English is not my mother language. Do you watch House M.D? Doctor House is the paradigm of the misanthrope. When around people he doesn't feel anxiety, fear or excessive self-consciousness, he couldn't care less, he feels distrust, hate and boredom. I know he is just a fictional character, still, he is a great example of a misanthropic personality. Unlike the social phobic, a misanthrope wouldn't avoid people because he has no other option but because he wants to. That´s where this two concepts diverge. Once i thought i was a misanthtrope, then i've come to realize that i'm just a social phobic and i must overcome this condition to become a misanthrope.
Not sure if i made myself clear though :roll:

 

[Jura]

I think of myself as a shy extrovert. I used to be popular but then got shy, and that was the end of that. I love people, talking to them, etc. And when I see them laughing, talking, I don't feel hatred, just envy. I want to be like them, the center of attention, again.

And yet I feel I'm "better" than most people in a way, and feel that if I got rid of my shyness, I would be cool again.

 

[dottie]

I think I'm a misanthrope. I distrust people and humanity as a whole. I believe in the evilness of human beings. I have a massive shield that keeps people at a distance. But I also feel guilty because of this.

I'm convinced that I'm a much "better" person than most people. Does this sound arrogant, or do I come across as a narcissist? I'm sure there are other members here who feel the same...

yes, i feel the same.

it's weird... when i keep people as strangers i feel as though i am a "better" person than them. if i get to know them, then they are usually the better person. i am so selfish of a person that any positive qualities they possess far outweigh anything i could contribute. it's like they are kinder, more caring, and connect to other people, therefore they win. they are better than me hands down. hope this makes sense, i'm pretty tired.

 

[Foxglove]

I think I'm a misanthrope. I distrust people and humanity as a whole. I believe in the evilness of human beings. I have a massive shield that keeps people at a distance. But I also feel guilty because of this.

I'm convinced that I'm a much "better" person than most people. Does this sound arrogant, or do I come across as a narcissist? I'm sure there are other members here who feel the same...

I'm with you on the distrust and believing most people are evil part, but I don't think I'm better than others. Quite the opposite - I always feel inferior. Yeah most people are evil, selfish, arrogant, snotty, sneaky -- I could go on and on. But I still feel inferior to them because they can make a place for themselves in the world, while I am buried alive at home and don't have a real life at all. That makes me a loser.

 

[Argamemnon]

Not sure if i made myself clear though :roll:

You did, thanks for the clarification and pointing out the difference between social phobia and misanthropy.

 

[Argamemnon]

I'm with you on the distrust and believing most people are evil part, but I don't think I'm better than others. Quite the opposite - I always feel inferior. Yeah most people are evil, selfish, arrogant, snotty, sneaky -- I could go on and on. But I still feel inferior to them because they can make a place for themselves in the world, while I am buried alive at home and don't have a real life at all. That makes me a loser.

I understand, I feel the same but by saying better I meant things like honesty, reliability etc..

 

[dottie]

Yeah most people are evil, selfish, arrogant, snotty, sneaky -- I could go on and on. But I still feel inferior to them because they can make a place for themselves in the world, while I am buried alive at home and don't have a real life at all. That makes me a loser.

exactly that! (except i work and go to school.) i just don't feel i have the ability to actually make a place in the world (mine isn't important enough) or to advance to the top of the ladder. these people have the ability to give up a piece of themselves, to connect with others in a way that i can't.

 

[Foxglove]

I'm with you on the distrust and believing most people are evil part, but I don't think I'm better than others. Quite the opposite - I always feel inferior. Yeah most people are evil, selfish, arrogant, snotty, sneaky -- I could go on and on. But I still feel inferior to them because they can make a place for themselves in the world, while I am buried alive at home and don't have a real life at all. That makes me a loser.

I understand, I feel the same but by saying better I meant things like honesty, reliability etc..

Well, in that case....yeah, I do feel like I'm practically the only person in the world who tries to be polite, to follow the rules, to be fair, to always try to do the right thing. But what does that get me? I get treated as a doormat, people walk all over me, and there's nothing I can do about it. I have always taught my son to do all the things I just described, but I can't help feeling that I'm doing him a disservice. Maybe I should teach him to be a pushy, rude asshole, then he would certainly have an easier time in life.

 

[Broken_Memory]

I'm with you on the distrust and believing most people are evil part, but I don't think I'm better than others. Quite the opposite - I always feel inferior. Yeah most people are evil, selfish, arrogant, snotty, sneaky -- I could go on and on. But I still feel inferior to them because they can make a place for themselves in the world, while I am buried alive at home and don't have a real life at all. That makes me a loser.

I understand, I feel the same but by saying better I meant things like honesty, reliability etc..

Well, in that case....yeah, I do feel like I'm practically the only person in the world who tries to be polite, to follow the rules, to be fair, to always try to do the right thing. But what does that get me? I get treated as a doormat, people walk all over me, and there's nothing I can do about it. I have always taught my son to do all the things I just described, but I can't help feeling that I'm doing him a disservice. Maybe I should teach him to be a pushy, rude asshole, then he would certainly have an easier time in life.

Foxglove that sounds like me. I always feel like I have better morals than most people I've met, and I'll often think things like "the world would be so much better if people were more like me". More like me includes non-judgmental and polite. At the same time though, I feel inferior to people once I'm around them. (New people and strangers).

 

[jamez]

People can do good or bad, and I guess that for some that there is a constant battle raging on in their head. People have 'good' and 'evil' thoughts, but by and large most people are selfish (I'm not sure if this is the case everywhere in the world but is persistent in the western world). I mean that's all we can be really is selfish...we do things so we can feel better about ourselves even if it's making that donation to charity or whatever.

I try being fair and nice sometimes as well and I agree it doesn't get you nowhere but I've accepted this and I don't really want to go no where anyway. It really does pain me to see people getting taken advantage of and I really don't want to be one of those people. For the most part I am selfish and do things for myself. If I decide to give anything back I won't be expecting anything back my way, thats' just how it is.

 

[whocares]

Well, in that case....yeah, I do feel like I'm practically the only person in the world who tries to be polite, to follow the rules, to be fair, to always try to do the right thing. But what does that get me? I get treated as a doormat, people walk all over me, and there's nothing I can do about it. I have always taught my son to do all the things I just described, but I can't help feeling that I'm doing him a disservice. Maybe I should teach him to be a pushy, rude asshole, then he would certainly have an easier time in life.

Foxglove, you shouldn't expect recognition nor consideration for being the way you are. You believe in your values, you stick to them, live by them, that's the only thing that really matters. Do you really think someone gives a damn if you "always try to do the right thing"? Of course not, you do it because it's how it should be.

You're doing a good job educating your son under those values, you sure have my appreciation.

 

[whocares]

People can do good or bad, and I guess that for some that there is a constant battle raging on in their head. People have 'good' and 'evil' thoughts, but by and large most people are selfish (I'm not sure if this is the case everywhere in the world but is persistent in the western world). I mean that's all we can be really is selfish...we do things so we can feel better about ourselves even if it's making that donation to charity or whatever.

I try being fair and nice sometimes as well and I agree it doesn't get you nowhere but I've accepted this and I don't really want to go no where anyway. It really does pain me to see people getting taken advantage of and I really don't want to be one of those people. For the most part I am selfish and do things for myself. If I decide to give anything back I won't be expecting anything back my way, thats' just how it is.

This man speaks the truth!

 

[recluse]

I have had an upbrining where i was taught to be moral and polite, and i do look down on people who are rude, and immoral. For example some guys at work used to steal from the snacks vending machine, and i felt disgust towards them. They may think that a chocolate bar is cheap and counts for nothing, but stealing is stealing.

What really makes me bitter is the fact that pushy, arrogant people get more success out of life while shy modest people such as myself are left on the shelf so to speak. A lady at work told me that to get ahead in life i had to be less nice and that my manners would be more suited to the 18th century, but it's not my fault that my parents conditioned me to be the way i am, and besides i like being modest.

 

[Argamemnon]

it's like they are kinder, more caring, and connect to other people, therefore they win. they are better than me hands down. hope this makes sense, i'm pretty tired.

Well, if you think others are kinder or more caring, you're not a misanthrope.

 

[jaidacoy]

in a way i have become this too ^.. it definately makes u feel like ull never have a place in the world.. and that you will alwyas b consumed with yourself and your problems.. (such is me) .. and u just give up on believing that u can make connections.. as you move on ..

 

[dottie]

it's like they are kinder, more caring, and connect to other people, therefore they win. they are better than me hands down. hope this makes sense, i'm pretty tired.

Well, if you think others are kinder or more caring, you're not a misanthrope.

yeah i am "kinder" in that i am overly polite, don't step on toes, don't rock the boat, follow rules to a t, don't cheat etc etc... but i am selfish in that i am so self absorbed to have social anxiety and worry over what everyone thinks all the time. i am selfish of my time off of work/school- i don't give of my time. i would never be rude to a stranger but at the same time sa is a very selfish, self absorbed, consuming thing. it depends how you look at it.

 

[Argamemnon]

yeah i am "kinder" in that i am overly polite, don't step on toes, don't rock the boat, follow rules to a t, don't cheat etc etc... but i am selfish in that i am so self absorbed to have social anxiety and worry over what everyone thinks all the time. i am selfish of my time off of work/school- i don't give of my time. i would never be rude to a stranger but at the same time sa is a very selfish, self absorbed, consuming thing. it depends how you look at it.

i don't know whether this applies to most people who suffer from SA, but there might be some truth to it since social phobia is a complex illness.

 

[Foxglove]

Well, in that case....yeah, I do feel like I'm practically the only person in the world who tries to be polite, to follow the rules, to be fair, to always try to do the right thing. But what does that get me? I get treated as a doormat, people walk all over me, and there's nothing I can do about it. I have always taught my son to do all the things I just described, but I can't help feeling that I'm doing him a disservice. Maybe I should teach him to be a pushy, rude asshole, then he would certainly have an easier time in life.

Foxglove, you shouldn't expect recognition nor consideration for being the way you are. You believe in your values, you stick to them, live by them, that's the only thing that really matters. Do you really think someone gives a damn if you "always try to do the right thing"? Of course not, you do it because it's how it should be.

You're doing a good job educating your son under those values, you sure have my appreciation.

It certainly wasn't my intention to give the impression that I think I deserve a gold medal for my exemplary behavior :roll: . What I am saying is that I feel very resentful and aggressive to people who make my life miserable just because I don't have this "me first and all others be damned" mentality. I don't have these morals, values, or whatever you want to call them, for the purpose of impressing people or earning brownie points. It's just how I am.