CillaHasBrainActivity
Well-known member
So I created this account 2 years ago, but I was too shy to post anything. Now I remember it so here I go!
I have a problem.
I am completely and utterly terrified. It's not of anything, I'm just scared. So scared. All the time; it doesn't seem to end. I'm in college and it's hard to focus when you're panicking and trying not to have a breakdown every day. Fear is my default and I'm really tired of living life like this. I have chronic anxiety. It just doesn't stop. I feel like I'm the only one who has to suffer with this. I wake up and I'm terrified. The terror rises when I go outside (outside scares the crap out of me). My mom drives me to my college classes and all I can think of is that I want to get the hell out of there as soon as possible!
On top of this, I have chronic derealization disorder (which also never seems to stop -- I'm always out of it and scared), which is uncomfortable and causes even more fear. I've had these disorders wince I was 8 years old and I'm 19 now. I want to grow up and live life! But everything is so terrifying and I don't seem to be progressing after all these years. Even when I'm "relaxing" at home, I feel a level of fear. I have a therapist, but I don't have insurance so my appointments are few and far between! I just want to know if anyone else experiences this and if anyone can offer any support, please. Thank you.
I have a problem.
I am completely and utterly terrified. It's not of anything, I'm just scared. So scared. All the time; it doesn't seem to end. I'm in college and it's hard to focus when you're panicking and trying not to have a breakdown every day. Fear is my default and I'm really tired of living life like this. I have chronic anxiety. It just doesn't stop. I feel like I'm the only one who has to suffer with this. I wake up and I'm terrified. The terror rises when I go outside (outside scares the crap out of me). My mom drives me to my college classes and all I can think of is that I want to get the hell out of there as soon as possible!
On top of this, I have chronic derealization disorder (which also never seems to stop -- I'm always out of it and scared), which is uncomfortable and causes even more fear. I've had these disorders wince I was 8 years old and I'm 19 now. I want to grow up and live life! But everything is so terrifying and I don't seem to be progressing after all these years. Even when I'm "relaxing" at home, I feel a level of fear. I have a therapist, but I don't have insurance so my appointments are few and far between! I just want to know if anyone else experiences this and if anyone can offer any support, please. Thank you.