your thinking sounds exactly like mine and im sure alot of others here. i feel like a failure because of the way people treated me. it seems people have done things to you and you have alot of emotional baggage over it(im assuming.). thats why even now when things are better and you have people supporting you, you are still affected by those past emotions. you refuse to accept being ok, you constantly need the support of others. (i am not making presumptions about you, im just going by what im seeing.)
the only way to fix that is to disconnect yourself from those emotions. get rid of negative thought patterns. dont try to "be positive"...just try not being so negative. trust me you will catch yourself. ive done it.
sometimes if you try to be too positive your mind does not accept it. for example if you say "i am a confident person!" and you dont believe that at all, its not gonna work. if you say "i am growing a little more confident in myself daily." its more acceptable to your mind.