because we are weak. When I am feeling inferior I think about how humans are social because way back when we didn't have what it took to survive on our own. So I like to convince myself that I am unsocial not because I am inferior, but because I was made to be independent. It boost my ego, and makes me feel better. I would like to know your thoughts on why not being social is frowned upon, and why humans are social. Or if humans are social, maybe extroverts created this saying because they didn't know that people can be extroverted or introverted.
humans are social creatures
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Anomaly
Well-known member
Different = dangerous. As for the "frowned upon" part, it's somewhat like a spontaneous process.
Ultimately, humans are social. Just look at what you're doing right now -- posting on a forum. We have a fair amount of will to go against our natural tendencies, but it's not often that it happens. Think of sex, socializing, etc.
Ultimately, humans are social. Just look at what you're doing right now -- posting on a forum. We have a fair amount of will to go against our natural tendencies, but it's not often that it happens. Think of sex, socializing, etc.
I don't think that social creatures are by definition weak. In terms of survival, groups are always better of. That's because they share the load. After all, isn't that what our universe consists of? Tiny little parts that together form this beyond comprehensibly big system?
Some people frown upon social behavior because most of them are by default social. Unsocial behavior doesn't speak to their experience. Think about it, aren't we more comfortable here then in the real world because we speak to each others experience? ;3 Some people frown upon antisocial behavior, and some of us in turn do the same thing regarding social behavior. In that aspect, we're not so different.
As for me.. It's not that I don't like social behavior, it's just that my kind of social behavior is incompatible with the norm.
Some people frown upon social behavior because most of them are by default social. Unsocial behavior doesn't speak to their experience. Think about it, aren't we more comfortable here then in the real world because we speak to each others experience? ;3 Some people frown upon antisocial behavior, and some of us in turn do the same thing regarding social behavior. In that aspect, we're not so different.
As for me.. It's not that I don't like social behavior, it's just that my kind of social behavior is incompatible with the norm.
Maybe but there are different levels of social. I'm just saying for some people social is not there main element.
Honda
Well-known member
Nobody is the same but society defines people and that they should have certain traits or certain manners, etc.. Its an interesting yet complex topic IMO... But there is a cutting edge between society that raises a productive, intelligent and healthy individual or someone that has to pretend that he is all of the above..
Personally and IMHO, i have an impression that Society in America is the worst, its just merciless and people dont have no tolerance for imperfections.. This is my impression, if im wrong correct me..
Personally and IMHO, i have an impression that Society in America is the worst, its just merciless and people dont have no tolerance for imperfections.. This is my impression, if im wrong correct me..
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These are all theories. Wanna know why people are social? because they don't wanna be lonely. You can try and rationalize it different if you want.
All these theories are excuses. Everyone avoids the truth. They just want to rationalize it different so they don't appear weak or with less than others. Just accept it for what it really is, and adapt to it.
So many people here come up with theories for their social anxiety, they analyze everything, they analyze others, themselves etc. Keep it simple and and be honest. There's nothing wrong with being honest. Its as simple as accepting your life and taking responsibility for it. Be committed to changing your circumstances. You don't like going out? You don't like people? Deal with it! You are going to have to some day, or you can avoid that and be miserable. You aren't the only one who's uncomfortable, or lonely, or friendless, no money, no GF/BF, have a dysfunctional family etc. Take responsibility and stop trying to rationalize things differently.
So many people here come up with theories for their social anxiety, they analyze everything, they analyze others, themselves etc. Keep it simple and and be honest. There's nothing wrong with being honest. Its as simple as accepting your life and taking responsibility for it. Be committed to changing your circumstances. You don't like going out? You don't like people? Deal with it! You are going to have to some day, or you can avoid that and be miserable. You aren't the only one who's uncomfortable, or lonely, or friendless, no money, no GF/BF, have a dysfunctional family etc. Take responsibility and stop trying to rationalize things differently.
Not true at all. I have my own values and thats all I care about. Who the hell is anyone to tell me anything about MY life? People base success on achievements rather than values. Thats how they judge people. Everyone has their own interpretation of success, but most idiots don't have a mind of their own and try to live life by the guidelines of others. I reject that, in my opinion a life led by values is more fulfilling and meaningful than a life led by goals/achievements.
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Honda
Well-known member
^ I used the wrong words here.. What i meant is, society always has standards to judge people.. I wasnt trying to say society shapes what you are, if you have a mind and a heart you would be your own man but some of the challenges to face is society and its false standards...
Yep. We are social creatures because it's part of our biological programming. It has nothing to do with standards or values.
In that respect we are no different from monkeys, or piggies, or water buffalo.
coyote
Well-known member
Most living creatures are social to some extent.
At least one female and one male have to get together at some point to perpetuate the species.
Procreation is part of every animal's instinct to survive, along with eating, drinking, breathing, etc.
Human beings are animals, too. We just have big brains and opposable thumbs that allow us to use tools and build things. Otherwise, we pretty much behave like every other animal - and for the same reasons.
Our big brains just like to come up with all sorts of explanations for things.
But really, we all just want to survive and make more of ourselves.
Everything we do distills down to that.
At least one female and one male have to get together at some point to perpetuate the species.
Procreation is part of every animal's instinct to survive, along with eating, drinking, breathing, etc.
Human beings are animals, too. We just have big brains and opposable thumbs that allow us to use tools and build things. Otherwise, we pretty much behave like every other animal - and for the same reasons.
Our big brains just like to come up with all sorts of explanations for things.
But really, we all just want to survive and make more of ourselves.
Everything we do distills down to that.
Well I do not accept it. I'm not going to settle with having to have anxiety just because I leave my house. I will always try to improve myself whether or not it's SA or anything else I don't like. I'm not talking about vain things, I want to constantly try to make myself a better person. With that said I think there is a huge problem with people today telling other people to just deal with things or just accept things.
If humans are social creatures I should be able to eventually be in my natural state of socializing with no problems.
Honda
Well-known member
^ Theres no such thing as natural state.. Every person is different... Be yourself and stop obsessing about acting or behaving in a certain manner.. Make mistakes and look stupid thats they way to learn and move ahead... Its not bloody easy because you didnt connect much socially but worth it.. I had a hard time socially connecting with people now i got used it..
Fear is being out of touch with the existence hence people fear whats new or unusual..
Fear is being out of touch with the existence hence people fear whats new or unusual..
If every person if different then every person should have there own natural state. Which would be being themselves. I do not try to act in any way. I just don't want to be anxious so that I can be myself.
A lot of people have been saying thing like they got used to being that way and things like that. Or that there SA is part of them. My SA has nothing to do with my personality.
Anomaly
Well-known member
That begs the question, why do people get lonely? A theory isn't some bs that arises between two morons and alcohol, there is scientific research in these areas.
Dronee
1
You know.. suppose we don't need to bond in order to survive.. and that there's no 'biological' programming. And that humans aren't animals in any sense of the word... I still think we'll need to socialize.
Sure, animals socialize too.. but for us humans with our intellect, I think the urge to belong/connect is even greater.
Sure, animals socialize too.. but for us humans with our intellect, I think the urge to belong/connect is even greater.
If those things weren't true, that would make us what, robots?
I'm not so sure about this. I don't remember hearing about the occasional water buffalo that never leaves his house. :
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