How to tell if he likes me!??

C

Countrygirl98

Member
So me and this guy have been friends for almost 4 years now. When I first met him we had a thing, and we acted like we were dating but it wasn't offical. He was my first kiss and he was so special to me. One day he told me he liked another girl and we stopped talking for awhile. I was disappointed but let it slide. After he told me he liked another girl, he always still talked to me but I didn't really like it. We've had our arguments, but we've always moved past them. Lately he's been talking to me a lot more than he usually has. A couple nights ago we hungout, just us, and he kissed me. I wasn't expecting it at all. All the feelings I once had for him are starting to come back and I'm not sure if they are the same for him. How can I tell if he likes me or is just using me?!
 
FountainandFairfax

FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
For a lot of guys, this is like an onion; there's many layers between "just looking for sex" and "head over heels in love." If you suspect that he just wants to use you, then that's another thing altogether. Is he usually dishonest or shifty in other areas of his life? If so, then steer clear of him regardless.

If he's a nice guy with vague signals, then the best thing would probably be to just ask him what his feelings and intentions are, then decide if that's something you're okay with. I know it's tricky, but if this scares him off, then it's for the best. It doesn't mean he's a lecher or a bad guy, it likely just means he's not looking for a serious relationship. If you seem to be on the same wavelength, take it slow and treat it like a job interview - decide what you want out of the relationship and see how he qualifies.

Just don't convince yourself that you're okay with being "friends with benefits" or anything in that area - unless you're very sure of it. I get the feeling you're not, so be extra careful about making any kind of physical concessions. Try to keep it light and remember that these things should be fun, above all else. If it doesn't feel right, then it's probably not.
 
N

NamiraWilhelm

Well-known member
Only five days ago you made a thread about going through a 'bad break-up'. This is not the time to start a new relationship. If, after years of friendship, this is meant to blossom into something more, do yourself and this guy a favour and finish grieving for your most recent relationship first.
It certainly seems like a welcome distraction from your heartache but rebounding really isn't the way to go, take it from someone whose relationship history (up until recently) was nothing but a series of rebounds.
You may well have the same co-dependency issues I have. In which case you really ought to spend some time single, learning to be happy all by yourself and loving yourself, instead of seeking happiness and love in other people.
 
greggy

greggy

Well-known member
NamiraWilhelm said:
Only five days ago you made a thread about going through a 'bad break-up'. This is not the time to start a new relationship. If, after years of friendship, this is meant to blossom into something more, do yourself and this guy a favour and finish grieving for your most recent relationship first.
It certainly seems like a welcome distraction from your heartache but rebounding really isn't the way to go, take it from someone whose relationship history (up until recently) was nothing but a series of rebounds.
You may well have the same co-dependency issues I have. In which case you really ought to spend some time single, learning to be happy all by yourself and loving yourself, instead of seeking happiness and love in other people.
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How did you get so clever for someone so young namira? Hehe
 
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