Help! misunderstanding gone wrong, can I try to fix it somehow?

[MNM322]

Today I got a "good morning" too Makes me happy but its just basic greetings so far but its only been 2 weeks so maybe in a few months we may chat again. Just keep giving him space and letting him lead the way.... one day at a time.

Is it wrong I still care for him? I wish I didn't and I mean I know its not likely to ever be awesome between us again (but who knows, I had bigger fights with people who I still talk to sometimes).... and I know he hates cards and only wants to be neighbors etc... I get that

But my stupid caring nature, still cares for him and his mom. They are good people. He was nothing but good to me prior to this and fantastic to do my dogs... and I relate to him in having to care for a family member and the stress it brings. So I still care, I wish all the best for both of them... is that bad? Any way I can change it if so?

Also... I should only be replying lightly right now, right? I just reply back with a word or two, I feel he should be the one to start a chat if it happens... ya know... it seems better, then I don't come off as creepy to him.
Anyway... I feel so much better. HATE having people mad at me and living an "Eggshell" life

 

[Bree1989]

Wow, you sound way too nice. This guy might have his own problems, but that's no excuse to treat you so badly.

If I were you, I would completely ignore him. I wouldn't even glance in his direction ever again. If he feels like apologizing, then you can hear him out. But do NOT make the first move. Let him sort out his own issues first.

 

[kilojoule]

Oh yay I'm happy to hear you happy. I know this was really upsetting you.


I say be yourself and let him deal with it, in fact I think you should send him more cards lol That's who you are, a lovely caring person. Don't dampen down who you are for him.This whole thing has been his issue, not yours. Don't change a thing about yourself and he will come around. Really, he will.

 

[MNM322]

Well I am not rude. I am not gonna intentionally ignore him. I am not gonna "seek" him out either.... but ya his mom talks to me often still and I am surely not gonna ignore her either. I just wanna be good neighbors. Its easy for everyone to say "ignore him" when they don't have to see him almost daily and walk by his house, share a front yard and fence with him. Its not something I can "Escape" unless I never leave my home.

Its also not my nature to write someone off because they had a "Reaction"... I have no idea what is really going on but obviously if he was talking to me in his terms AFTER, he is getting over things.... and calming down. I have already forgiven him and I don't have ill feelings to him 1 bit. In fact, if anything, I care more because I know he has more **** going on than I realize and that makes me sad.

@Jewel ya thanks... haven't had any luck since... he was outside the past four days, pure torture for me but he was using a leaf blower so a convo was not a good idea anyway.... just keep hoping. I really need this good vibe esp since he is inherting his mom house and will be around a while, its just too akward to ignore for years and years. I'll keep you posted

 

[MNM322]

I did that before... but next time I will just ask, how are you? I don't wanna come off as cold and unapproachable. There is no harm in "friendly" convos with neighbors... and as I said, I was at fault to a degree, there was no need for me at all, to approach him while he was cleaning his car and assuming I was more important to him than in reality I was.

Its going to kill me come spring when he is outside alot more and talking to all the oter neighbors again. Thats when this depression is gonna kick in high gear.... I miss talking to him. I only wish he realized I have phone-phobia and would never of "Called" just for fun.... sigh.... anyway one day at a time. I may be crazy but I live in hope

 

[truffleshuffle]

Jewel is right don;t change. the world needs more caring people with good harts in it and I belive thats what you are!

 

[MNM322]

He spoke to me, on his terms, today! Maybe a 5 or so minute chat but it was beyond a greeting and we had some laughs! I am so excited and relieved... second chances are rare, so I cant mess this up

 

[MikeyC]

That's awesome.

 

[truffleshuffle]

He spoke to me, on his terms, today! Maybe a 5 or so minute chat but it was beyond a greeting and we had some laughs! I am so excited and relieved... second chances are rare, so I cant mess this up

Good luck and I hope it continues in the right direction

 

[coyote]

 

[MNM322]

Thanks everyone. I can not believe I got my wish so soon. He must truly be the sweet guy I believed he was.... I don't even wanna focus on the issue or the past. Its over and its done but this is the here and now and its great... so keep moving forward