Guys, how do YOU break the ice??

Shoegazer

Member
Ok, I'll get the back story over with so you can see what I am getting at. I guess the first thing you should know is that I am pretty rusty at this stuff.. It has been exactly 5 years since I graduated from high school. I didn't go to college, so it has been a lot harder for me to find a girl that is mutually interested. In fact, I couldn't even find one girl who was mutually interested in the course of these 5 years despite my subtle attempts.

Yesterday, I attended my cousin's 21st birthday party. I only really knew anyone that was in my family at this party (hold this particular cousin.. I actually don't know her all that well oddly enough), otherwise I really didn't know anyone else that attended personally. Anyways, my dad pointed a girl out to me who I have seen at their parties in the past.. one of my cousin's friends. He was telling me to go up and talk to her, but tbh I've never been the type to just approach someone out of nowhere. Also, she's a very attractive girl and seems to have a pretty good head on her shoulders.. so I couldn't help but assume that she probably wasn't single anyways. So, no... I didn't end up trying to talk to her. :eek:h:

I ended up going home earlier on, but my mother must have stayed at the party until midnight at least. Once she gets home, she comes up to me and goes "Guess what?". She had talked to this girl all through out the night, and told her I thought she was cute. This is all my mom said too, she wasn't trying to get at anything or shoving the idea of me down her throat (no "my son is single", "you should hook up with my son", etc. or anything like that). But to my surprise, she was actually interested, apparently smiling all like "really?!". So I guess she was asking all about me, was wondering if I was coming back to the party and ended up friending me on FB. I'm pretty sure you've got the idea by now.. but yeah, she seems pretty interested to me.

So, now all I have to do is talk to her. I know this shouldn't be difficult, but if you couldn't tell, this is a scenario I have hardly ever been in. All I really know is "the basics" (greet her, ask her how she is & ask lots of questions). I'm not looking for a tutorial, but I would like to know.. What do YOU do or have you done to break the ice in a scenario like this?? I guess what I really want to know is, is there something that you'd typically do in this situation that I am missing??

Thanks in advance for your time and any input!
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
Tell her this joke:

How much does a polar bear weigh?
Enough to break the ice.

And you're in. :)

No, but seriously, you already answered your question which SilentBird pointed out. Talk a little bit about yourself, too, but don't overdo it. She likes you, so three-quarters of the battle is already won. :)
 

R3K

Well-known member
Tell her this joke:

How much does a polar bear weigh?
Enough to break the ice.

i just lol'd real good...

being serious now: going on the facts, details and careful anilyses' you've given in this post, my conclusion is that you're over-anilyzing the whole thing. tell yourself you don't care about hooking up/getting rejected by this girl, and just numbly go through the motions of texting/hanging out with her or w/e.

if you succeed and hook up with her then you did something right, if not, then you're not even worried about it and you're scootin along to "greener pastures" (other women.)

[edit, really ****ize is profanity???]
 

Shoegazer

Member
:giggle:
Thank you for the replies everyone!

R3K, you're beyond right... I always dwell when this type of thing happens to me every once in a very blue moon. I try pretty hard not to think about it, but I still struggle. I'm just going to have to take a deep breath and keep it as neutral as possible. Otherwise as you already know, I really don't even know her at all. If nothing comes of it, I should be fine in due time. After all, I liked the first girl that I came to this forum about for 6+ years straight.. then got over her in a matter of weeks when nothing came of her.
 
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