Does it ever ever ever get get better?
- Thread starter Earthcircle
- Start date
Earthcircle
Well-known member
Your mention of being in one's teens is very poignant for me. I insisted on seeing a doctor for anxiety when I was 10, and I began seeing a social worker for psychotherapy when I was 15. I've had tons of therapy. I feel cheated because, you know, it's supposed to work. And therapy often made me feel much worse, so I was paying for it twice over in some sense.
nothingmuch
Active member
Hi, Earthcircle. Just wanted to say I had a similar experience of becoming rude when I took an antidepressant (Lexapro). Before that I tried some other antidepressants that made me nauseated.
Do you exercise? That helps me with depression and makes it easier to interact with people. I've noticed when I'm depressed that people seem more critical and mean. (I'm not sure if that's my imagination or if they are reacting to my depression.)
^^exercise does help but its similar to a drug in that the effects are only temporary..
well when i was in my teens i knew something was wrong with me but i didnt know exactly what it was..i thought that therapy and medication was only for 'crazy people'..looking back im not sure if anything could have been done, if meds or therapy would have helped at all..a combination of introversion, anxiety, depression and avoidance/schizoid pd made it a very confusing time..i think you would have to see a doc that specialized in personality disorders, treating avoidance but even then, once you are past age 30-40, what significant progress can be made?
well when i was in my teens i knew something was wrong with me but i didnt know exactly what it was..i thought that therapy and medication was only for 'crazy people'..looking back im not sure if anything could have been done, if meds or therapy would have helped at all..a combination of introversion, anxiety, depression and avoidance/schizoid pd made it a very confusing time..i think you would have to see a doc that specialized in personality disorders, treating avoidance but even then, once you are past age 30-40, what significant progress can be made?
Earthcircle
Well-known member
Earlier in the thread, I noted that I seem to respond well to an authoritarian male, one who isn't cruel. I learned this from a rather authoritarian hypnotherapist, one of the more interesting therapeutic experiences I had. I only wish I could have seen him on a regular basis, instead of just a handful of times. I can't return to him, because he's in another country, and he doesn't believe in just seeing someone indefinitely. But I really feel that I respond well to that. If you just flat-out tell me what to do -- and putting me into trance doesn't hurt -- I can actually be quite obedient.
nothingmuch
Active member
I've never been hypnotized but I've read that a confident authoritative voice is very important. So maybe any male hypnotist would work for you?
Earthcircle
Well-known member
I think you just contradicted yourself. :bigsmile:
A confident authoritative voice is important, so not just any male hypnotist would work.
theslowesthand
Banned
I'm 40, and are as avoidant as when i was 30, and were as avoidant as when i was 20, .... 15 ... 10 ... 5. Nothing seems to ever change for me, and i doubt it ever will. It's not impossible, just highly unlikely ... as especially at my age no solutions are "given" to me by others, so i can only rely on myself for solutions ... so the result is that i never find those solutions (due to being solidly stuck in my ways). I wouldn't give up all hope, but just try to be "realistic" about the likelihood of change...
Earthcircle
Well-known member
It makes me sad that therapy is supposed to help, therapy being something very hard and depressing. And then when it doesn't work the patient gets blamed. I really feel that the only way for me to get better is the total melting of my will, something like a mystical experience.
theslowesthand
Banned
Therapy never worked for me, despite many years (on & off) doing it, and various different types. I "blame" the fact that different types of therapy works for different types of people.
I believe that the only way for me to get better is the total melting of certain deep-rooted stuff, including my stubbirn my will & habits. And i believe that for certan issues/problems, maybe only a "mystical experience" maybe help, or some equally spiritual/new-agey/religious/etc methods.
So to break these entrenched habits, requires some pretty deep/intense/etc therapies, i would say.
Like he said. I think acceptance is maybe the first step (& accepting that you might never be totally or even partially rid of it). And accepting that it's a MAJOR MJAOR difficult problem that you have (which is the truth). And then like bsammy said, maybe try to attempt "some major therapy and life changes".
Earthcircle
Well-known member
I hope I don't sound sarcastic when I say that I don't know what major therapy is. Everyone here knows that I've had therapy, so they must be distinguishing major therapy from what I've already had. In other words, you must be thinking that only some therapy is major, not all of it. So what do you have in mind?
theslowesthand
Banned
I don't know about bsammy, whom i quoted, but what i mean by "major therapy" is i guess alternative or unconventional therapy (not the conventional in-a-chair-in-a-room-talking therapy). Things like subliminal audio, meditation, yoga, prayer, beliefs-retraining audio, crystals/oils/essences, gratitude, creative manifesting, ........ the list goes on & on. Where i'm currently at, is the when-in-day-to-address & what-alternative-system(s)-to-use stage. Usually i'm kinda stuck in trying to address my mood/feelings in the now, but am realising that often i AM capable of addressing future/longer-term stuff, even thought i might not be feeling that great, or being "busy" with various other non-essential (but seemingly-very-important) stuff. It's all about prioritizing, and alotting the correct amount of time for various aspects of one's life...
Whoopdeedoo
Well-known member
On good days i stick to the to do list...
And control what I can....
I control myself, tend to my environment , my space & my surroundings
As best i can while home.
And i try to accept and respect that these phobias are just part of who I am
and what makes me Me.
When I find I must go out
I bring a buddy or I go out during off hours
Example; after 8 pm to the foodstore
I know its avoidant behavior and all that psychobabble horseshit
But wht not accept, respect and honor yourself and your plight and. Work with youself
Honoring your comfort zones instead of always fighting it.
To constantly beat yourself down because youre different
Is counterproductive. I try to just go with it a little more everyday
Taking babysteps along the way...
Be gentler and kinder to yourself
This is what i try and do.
And control what I can....
I control myself, tend to my environment , my space & my surroundings
As best i can while home.
And i try to accept and respect that these phobias are just part of who I am
and what makes me Me.
When I find I must go out
I bring a buddy or I go out during off hours
Example; after 8 pm to the foodstore
I know its avoidant behavior and all that psychobabble horseshit
But wht not accept, respect and honor yourself and your plight and. Work with youself
Honoring your comfort zones instead of always fighting it.
To constantly beat yourself down because youre different
Is counterproductive. I try to just go with it a little more everyday
Taking babysteps along the way...
Be gentler and kinder to yourself
This is what i try and do.
ive scoured the internet and ive seen some people with mild social anxiety that have seemed to overcome it but have yet to see any cases where people that have had avoidant pd have had much success in dealing or overcoming it...if someone has, please point it out to me..
ive learned recently that anxiety is only a secondary problem of avoidant pd..i can conquer the anxiety part but the avoidant part is so hard-wired into my personality that cannot imagine trying to unravel it..
ive learned recently that anxiety is only a secondary problem of avoidant pd..i can conquer the anxiety part but the avoidant part is so hard-wired into my personality that cannot imagine trying to unravel it..
Pacific_Loner
Pirate from the North Pole
I'm sorry if I'm annoying but I noticed you dodged that one.
I wonder if you realize how important is the effect of physical effort on your brain.
Earthcircle
Well-known member
I have tried hypnotherapy which had very mixed results. There was an initial high which was incredible, but then there were scary flashbacks of things from my childhood. I recommend against hypnotherapy with age regression, but I do not necessarily recommend against all hypnotherapy. In fact, I love listening to this guy on Youtube: Michael Sealey.
Earthcircle
Well-known member
I recently moved to a foreign country, and am still trying to get oriented. I was exercising, but have fallen behind due to the trauma (etc.) of moving.
Earthcircle
Well-known member
I think I have a personality disorder. Hence, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, while valuable in some ways, is only a partial solution at best. Psychoanalysis intrigues me because, even though my analysis back in the day was a failure, it purports to do precisely what I need: personality restructuring. This was the original psychotherapy that caused a huge stir about a century ago. It's a pity that it now lies discredited ... or is it? I wonder, and I need to know.