Do you have any friends?

[ShiJai]

Does anyone else find it hard to make acquaintances in to friends?I have a lot of acquaintances online but it seem I can never make that extra step and make then friends.I think thats what my main problem has always been with making friends.I don't know what to do the farther the relationship and with a lot of acquaintances you usually lose contact with them after awhile.

I find the older I get, the less interested people seem to be in making new friends. Making new aquaintances is hard enough, but asking anyone to take that next step...? Mostly people just seem to go their own way with the people they've know for years.

I honestly don't know how people make friends on-line. Just writing a post is nerve racking for me. Sometimes it takes me a couple of days to work up the courage to check the computer afterwards.
It's stupid I know.
Sometimes being alone isn't so bad.
ShiJai.

 

[LukeL]

I have a couple of friends. One of them has been my friend since I was 8 years old so my social phobia wasn't a factor. The other friends I have I either made through him or just people I would talk with at school. Now my love life (or lack there of) is a whole other story.

 

[Waybuloo]

I don't have any friends sadly. I only really have what people would call accquaintances.

same here ...

i was never a loner in high school , i always hung out with "the cool people" because i was on the football team but i never did do anything with them outside of school . since school ended , i have no friends. i have a few good accquaintances (i met them from playing basketball at the gym, and us all having a shoe fetish ) . they are a bit younger then me though . after high school ive never been able to make many accquaintance my own age - its always that they have been much older than me or much younger than me ...

to answer the question , no i dont have anyone i consider a true friend...

Hey jay fan, Are u a fan of Jaw Chow/Chou by any chance?

 

[Waybuloo]

Does anyone else find it hard to make acquaintances in to friends?I have a lot of acquaintances online but it seem I can never make that extra step and make then friends.I think thats what my main problem has always been with making friends.I don't know what to do the farther the relationship and with a lot of acquaintances you usually lose contact with them after awhile.

I find the older I get, the less interested people seem to be in making new friends. Making new aquaintances is hard enough, but asking anyone to take that next step...? Mostly people just seem to go their own way with the people they've know for years.

I honestly don't know how people make friends on-line. Just writing a post is nerve racking for me. Sometimes it takes me a couple of days to work up the courage to check the computer afterwards.
It's stupid I know.
Sometimes being alone isn't so bad.
ShiJai.

In uni people seem to stay with the pplz they know from high school generally. Mostly people are already comfortable with their own group dat's composed mostly from peopel they already know.

as for online, i'm always wondering what would another person in my place say? would this person think me weird, talking too much about unncessary things etc

Alone isn't so bad because ur not challenged and if u stay that way long enough u're losing the skill u need to deal with challenging situations such as social interaction whether online or real life. I still push myself to do that even though i'm deeply insecure.

 

[qipuqipu]

There's a group of people I hang around with, that know me. Of these, there's only one who I'd consider a friend, as we actually have similar interests, see each other sometimes, etc. (there's also a couple of people I still see that I used to hang out with, one of them being what I'd consider my 'best friend'). But none of them really 'gets' my problem at all. They seem to think I'm being silly, or make fun of me. There's one guy in particular, who sometimes seems friendly, sometimes a patronising git :x. Recently I decided that I didn't have to be friends with these people if I didn't get on with them, and stopped beating myself up about not talking to them. Which is something, I suppose.

I have 3 online friends, one who Ive met in real life from the internet.

Cool! I can't seem to make friends on the internet

 

[luckie]

i dont have any friends really. Well what you could call good friends. Whenever my so called friend said she d fone me she never did. She also said we d have to arrange to meet up but we never did. I give up. They ve always let me down. I dont know why i bothered. They never really cared about my problems.

 

[Richey]

i cant stress how easy it is to make new friends when your under the intoxication spell, you lose all those little hang-ups and your self-conciousness dissapears, or you feel suicidal tepending on the person of course......but its worth it even if it only lasts a few hours

 

[newshyguy]

yo

i can relate to the ones who said, that they had friends when they werent suffering from anxiety. I have like only 2 friends i still contact from high school, one of them is like the closest because we play soccer and just share college life experiences. but i would like to be a little more closer to them . then in college i made a few new friends, 1 i really like, and the other can be good friends, but i also have a hard time making new friends. i feel like im holding me back and missing opportunities.

 

[LittleMissScareAll]

Re: yo

i can relate to the ones who said, that they had friends when they werent suffering from anxiety.

I guess that's why I've never had any true friends. I've always had sp. Though it was easier when I was a kid--at least I did have some people who talked to me and stuff, even if they were fake.

 

[Quixote]

I have had a few friends recently, after years of near complete solitude in secondary school and the first two years of uni. The problem is these guys and girls live abroad (for some reason I only manage to make friends abroad, maybe because I don't have to show how uninteresting my normal life is). So I am almost always alone.

I think if I had a few friends I would easily be able to make new ones as well, because I would have a bit of social life and I would not feel worried, every time someone talks to me (maybe a potential friend), that he/she may suddently ask "so what do you normally do on saturday night" or similar questions. It is a vicious cycle really.

As a reply to some of the posts I have read here, I would like to say that perhaps a problem some of you seem to have is that you expect other people to show interest for your problems immediately after you know them. If they do not, you assume they can't be friends of yours. I think this is wrong, even though I understand it because I used to behave a nit like this myself. If you meet someone that you might like you should try to *give* something to them before you expect something to be given to you. Show respect and trust before you expect others to give it to you. It takes time to build a relationship of mutual trust and understanding, and people have a lot of problems of their own, they may be ready to listen to you only after some time. But I know it's not easy.

 

[McNuggets]

I have quite a substantial number of friendly 'comrades' at art college - it's actually proving one of the most socially-flavoured periods of my life so far, although of course in every or most respects in life you always wish your true heyday to still be ahead of you. And of course, what with the unwavering potency of positive thinking (the whole 'the right situation shall prevail, with your aid, in the end' ethos), I'm sure that'll be the case.

It's curious in many ways, as I tend to be an adaptable sort so far as social involvement is concerned. The ill side of that is that I can't always tell what would be the 'best' option for reaching my 'peak' - maintaining a wide social circle or just keeping a fairly modest one and factoring in time for solitude. Hence, I can prove somewhat ambivalent, if perfectly capable, on the 'friend making' score. As we probably all are, in the heat of the moment, I'd imagine.

During my primary school days I'd tend to enjoy a real fraternity of folks - six people particularly come to mind with whom I had close associations, with another 10-20 possibly considered. Online friendships have flourished also down the years, although I tended to keep myself low-key and hence had no real close 'friends' except my twin brother, duiring secondary school. But, on reviewing all that, I wouldn't say the situation was all that shabby in the slightest.

 

[Danfalc]

Nope.. i really suck at the making friends whole thing,have a few online people i speak to... and i can only really consider a couple of them friends.Luckily i have my mum... she keeps me going and gives me so much support.

 

[newshyguy]

1

i wish i was a kid again and be making friends like it was no big deal, away from this anxiety issues