Could you go through college completely without dating at all?

[LastCaress]

I have gone out with people from my school but don't really obsess about it and over think it. I have even gone on dates with a girl I met in my 1st semester and still know her. We go out to eat and go out to places but I don 't see it as anything romantic, even though she may like me a little. To be honest I am not chasing girls or friends anymore, and it has works out better for me. I don't see dating or being a relationship as critical. I can stand on my own by learning how to live and survive on my own and not depend on others.

 

[Solitudes_Grace]

I spent two years going to a community college and two additional years going to a university. During these four years, I never dated at all. I never wanted to anyway. I didn't go to college to date. I went to college to learn and improve myself. If it matters, I was a commuter; I lived at home with my family rather than on campus, so I suppose I never had the urge to become as socially involved with the other students as much as any of the students who lived on campus might have. However, even if I had lived on campus, I still don't think I would have been interested in dating.

 

[coyote]

i really wish i had dated in college, but i was married at the time, and i was trying to do the right thing

a word of advice: don't get married before you go to college - it ruins all the fun

 

[leongrado]

I could go through college without dating but it would be really sad. A lot of people don't have time because they don't use their time efficiently. I would say take less credits so you can socialize more.

The other thing to note here that you don't just get into dating from having time. Same goes for friends. If you're not actively searching and pushing for social interactions, they're not going to happen. You have to put yourself out there. Yes that means getting rejected a lot.

Seeing that this is a SA forum, SA is probably the greatest barrier for most of us. Dating is unlikely to happen if we don't get SA handled. Also worth noting that by overcoming SA, many people also overcome the problems of making friends and having relationships.

 

[Capsaicin]

I could go through college without dating but it would be really sad. A lot of people don't have time because they don't use their time efficiently. I would say take less credits so you can socialize more.

The other thing to note here that you don't just get into dating from having time. Same goes for friends. If you're not actively searching and pushing for social interactions, they're not going to happen. You have to put yourself out there. Yes that means getting rejected a lot.

Seeing that this is a SA forum, SA is probably the greatest barrier for most of us. Dating is unlikely to happen if we don't get SA handled. Also worth noting that by overcoming SA, many people also overcome the problems of making friends and having relationships.

Well, it's not just the credits for me. I have an ailing father and a brother that really needs me right now, so I'm pretty tied up with social obligations as it is. Worrying about dating and all the little rules and expectations that go along with it would just be way too much. Maybe someone more social would have a better support network, though, and be more able to take on life than I am.

 

[Severian]

I went through 4 years of university and had exactly 5 conversations with other students.

 

[Richey]

I went through 4 years of university and had exactly 5 conversations with other students.

It can happen. For anyone. I think it all depends on the class you get. Every class will have different people in it. You may get some that have a few cliquey groups. Others that are loud or quiet.

The second course I took we all worked in selected groups and we all had a great time for around 6 months working on the major project. It was the best time I've ever had, even better than any work environment. It was very relaxed environment and we all had a lot of fun, we got to work on our projects in our own workshops with nobody else around, but we still worked hard. Best times I've ever had. Nothing compares to it since then.

The first course I took was the opposite.

So a lot of it is situational and depends on luck.

In terms of dating. well. You have to pretty confident to ask someone out. Especially if you don't know them that well. I went on one date with a girl i'd been talking to for over a year, made things a bit easier. Because i'd normally ask her how she is going anyway meant that asking if she wanted to go out somewhere a whole lot easier. In fact, just forming a friendship or being interested for a while creates a relationship so that if you decide to ask out on a date, it is way easier, because you already know them.

 

[Kiwong]

I never dated in University. I actually wanted to then, but didn't have the courage to ask any girls out. I topped my course, but socially university was a disaster. I discovered then I wasn't what women were looking for.

 

[awkwardamanda]

It's not as if you have to choose between focusing on school and refusing to date anyone, or socializing and not caring about school. A lot of people find a happy medium.

Now that being said...

I wish I had spent more time single during university. When I had a boyfriend, that seriously limited the time I could have been studying. He was pretty disrespectful of the fact that I had other things to do. Then I spent two years crushing on someone I couldn't talk to. I wish I had at least made some friends but that's just a lost cause. I really do feel like I have to get the rest of my life in order before I can date again though. I've been out of school for four years and still haven't found a full-time job. I'm 28 and I still live with my parents. That's real attractive. Even once I find a new job, I don't even want to think about dating until I can move out. I don't have enough privacy here. But I don't have a social life so it's not as if the opportunity will come up anyway. At this point I've pretty much missed my chance to even learn about dating and make mistakes. It's going to be that much harder later on. I think I'll just end up living alone and becoming a crazy cat lady.