Conjuring Up Bad Scenarios That Haven't Happened

[theoutsider]

Lately, I've been having a problem with thinking about bad scenarios that could potentially happen where I wind up looking really bad. I really think this is a by product of my anxiety because in the past, many times bad things have happened that I wasn't prepared to handle at the moment. Then, of course, I'd find myself days later thinking of responses I should have come up with. By then, it's too late. I think these conjured scenarios are my way of coming up with a good response should they or something similar occur. The problem is, they often leave me sad, as if the scenario actually happened. Sometimes they leave me with violent thoughts as in thinking what I'd really like to do physcially to my imagined antagonist. Almost always, it puts me in a bad mood one way or the other. Does anyone experience this? I'm trying to get better at reminding myself these things haven't actually happened and most likely never will.

 

[PugofCrydee]

Lately, I've been having a problem with thinking about bad scenarios that could potentially happen where I wind up looking really bad. I really think this is a by product of my anxiety because in the past, many times bad things have happened that I wasn't prepared to handle at the moment. Then, of course, I'd find myself days later thinking of responses I should have come up with. By then, it's too late. I think these conjured scenarios are my way of coming up with a good response should they or something similar occur. The problem is, they often leave me sad, as if the scenario actually happened. Sometimes they leave me with violent thoughts as in thinking what I'd really like to do physcially to my imagined antagonist. Almost always, it puts me in a bad mood one way or the other. Does anyone experience this? I'm trying to get better at reminding myself these things haven't actually happened and most likely never will.

I do this all the time.
I know there's a good side and bad side to me.. When I was younger I let the bad side win out a few times.. people got hurt, sometimes deservedly so. I soon learnt that people are jerks, and if I paid them justice in a physical sense, I suffered. So I learnt the world is now built for keyboard warriors and snipers that feel safe in their own homes. They'd never say those things to your face in RL. The world has empowered the weak.

It's something I struggle with.

So yes, I fantasize about what I'd LIKE to happen, an alternate reality plays through my head.. in my mind, the person who speaks to me with open disrespect gets hurt.. badly. The guy who beats his partner gets hurt.. badly. The person who hurts a child dies.. painfully..

I can honestly say, if I was ruler of the world, this is how it would be. An eye for an eye.

I totally (or at least think I do) understand where you're coming from.

 

[FountainandFairfax]

When I don't exercise I sometimes get that way... especially when I was younger. I think guys need to do something physical or else our hunter/gatherer instincts get the better of us and we start to dream up these kind of heroic, even-the-score type scenarios because we're not expending the energy any other way. When you're anxious or phobic or insecure it's probably even worse. Or maybe that's just me.

 

[LoyalXenite]

I definitely have similar as well. Sometimes good and sometimes bad, often very vivid and sometimes its very hard to pull out of it. Intrusive thoughts and disassociation make for frustrating bedfellows. But sometimes its nice to disappear for a while when its not a bad fantasy

 

[theoutsider]

When I don't exercise I sometimes get that way... especially when I was younger. I think guys need to do something physical or else our hunter/gatherer instincts get the better of us and we start to dream up these kind of heroic, even-the-score type scenarios because we're not expending the energy any other way. When you're anxious or phobic or insecure it's probably even worse. Or maybe that's just me.

Good points. Since the global lockdown, I've noticed these thoughts have increased with me. Probably due to the lack of exercise while being inside more often than normal.

 

[theoutsider]

I definitely have similar as well. Sometimes good and sometimes bad, often very vivid and sometimes its very hard to pull out of it. Intrusive thoughts and disassociation make for frustrating bedfellows. But sometimes its nice to disappear for a while when its not a bad fantasy

I don't mind escaping into the good thoughts. Those never put me in a bad mood....unless I snap out of it and realize I'm not a popular singer/great athlete/best selling author/billionaire super hero/etc etc etc...lol.

 

[theoutsider]

I do this all the time.
I know there's a good side and bad side to me.. When I was younger I let the bad side win out a few times.. people got hurt, sometimes deservedly so. I soon learnt that people are jerks, and if I paid them justice in a physical sense, I suffered. So I learnt the world is now built for keyboard warriors and snipers that feel safe in their own homes. They'd never say those things to your face in RL. The world has empowered the weak.

It's something I struggle with.

So yes, I fantasize about what I'd LIKE to happen, an alternate reality plays through my head.. in my mind, the person who speaks to me with open disrespect gets hurt.. badly. The guy who beats his partner gets hurt.. badly. The person who hurts a child dies.. painfully..

I can honestly say, if I was ruler of the world, this is how it would be. An eye for an eye.

I totally (or at least think I do) understand where you're coming from.

I'll give you a good example. One day I was driving out of the parking lot after grocery shopping. A guy unexpectedly walked in front of my car on his way to the store. I was surprised he walked right in front of me so I had to stop short. He was a little startled by my car (I don't know if he didn't see my car or if he saw it but expected me to stop immediately). We made eye contact and both gave each other an apologetic wave. He was sorry he'd walked in front of my car while it was moving, I was sorry I came close to hitting him. No problem. He continued on his way and I continued on mine. That's when the intrusive imaginings started. I began thinking what my reaction would have been if he would have given me the bird instead of waving politely. Would I have let it go like I've done so many times with rude drivers and felt angry later? Would I have given him the bird right back, risking a fight but not caring? By the time I got home, I was so caught up in the scenario that didn't happen, my anxiety level had climbed to a ridiculous and unnecessary high. Internally, I was just as angry as if he'd actually offended me when in reality, he was quite pleasant about it. I'd taken a good example of two adults behaving like adults and still managed to turn it into a negative.

 

[SilentAndShy]

I think I do it for every task that gives me anxiety. The absolute worst case scenario which sometimes - frighteningly - goes into fatalistic thoughts for myself and the people around me. I don't think I can ever get rid of this process, it's become engrained in me sadly.

 

[planetweirdo]

I can totally relate. I constantly ruminate about terrible 'what if' scenarios. I think this is the down side of being a highly imaginative person.