Can't stand idiotic remarks by others

T

Truthseeker

Active member
Yesterday my dad paid a visit to his friend. This man blunty asked my father what's wrong with me and why I'm not in a relationship. He also told him that he was pretty sure that I'm a virgin, and that other people should "persuade" me to show interest in women. He also implied that I should visit a prostitute as soon as possible.

When my father told this I was like "so what if I'm a virgin, does this make me a totally worthless human being or what?" I didn't say this to my father but it crossed my mind. If this guy (my father's friend) is so compassionate and humane, why doesn't he donate money to the poor, why doesn't he help people in need? There are millions of people who are being slaughtered in wars, millions who are dying from starvation or suffering from terrible diseases and so on. It seems not having sex is considered to be the worst thing that can possibly happen to a human being.
 
BlackPuma

BlackPuma

1
Ugh.. I hate how being a virgin is looked down upon. :/ What is really troubling is that he seems to think that you taking advantage of some poor prostitute's misfortune (because she's not doing it because she likes it, that I'm pretty much sure off), is better then you being a virgin. :/

Don't let him press you.. Your first time should be when you're ready for it, and no sooner. ~WO
 
F

Fighter86

Well-known member
Sounds to me like the problem is with your father's friend, not you. To bluntly ask someone that question is plain rude, and to be honest none of his business as well. And no, there is nothing wrong if your not in a relationship as well, don't let his words get you down.
 
T

Truthseeker

Active member
blackpuma said:
Don't let him press you.. Your first time should be when you're ready for it, and no sooner. ~WO
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I'm nearly 34 and frankly don't care about sex anymore, I'm just not interested. I have a full time job; managing my chronic depression.
 
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Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
Truthseeker said:
Yesterday my dad paid a visit to his friend. This man blunty asked my father what's wrong with me and why I'm not in a relationship. He also told him that he was pretty sure that I'm a virgin, and that other people should "persuade" me to show interest in women. He also implied that I should visit a prostitute as soon as possible.

When my father told this I was like "so what if I'm a virgin, does this make me a totally worthless human being or what?" I didn't say this to my father but it crossed my mind. If this guy (my father's friend) is so compassionate and humane, why doesn't he donate money to the poor, why doesn't he help people in need? There are millions of people who are being slaughtered in wars, millions who are dying from starvation or suffering from terrible diseases and so on. It seems not having sex is considered to be the worst thing that can possibly happen to a human being.
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That just sounds like garbage men are conditioned to believe. We are all told we need to do things by a certain age to be normal...manly...womanly etc. It doesn't somehow make you less of a person because you haven't exchanged bodily fluids with someone. We have reduced it to the most base and mundane of things if that were the case.

(Of course I personally believe sex should be an expression/result of emotion.)

What do you want? Are you interested in women? If so you work on your social anxiety. Do some things to get outside of your comfort zone, but don't torture yourself. "You can't live your life to please others."
 
T

Truthseeker

Active member
Pookah said:
Are you interested in women? If so you work on your social anxiety. Do some things to get outside of your comfort zone, but don't torture yourself. "You can't live your life to please others."
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I'm not interested in women anymore. I'll be 34 soon and managing my depression and anxiety is a full time job. I totally agree with you, thanks for the support.
 
lyricalliaisons

lyricalliaisons

Well-known member
Part of the reason I hate being around people is because I hate listening to idiotic, horrible statements like that. I hear them every time I'm in public.
 
Ritta

Ritta

Well-known member
I can relate to that. I hate people trying to dictate what I should do or should not do. I'm 34 and plenty of people keep telling me I should get married and have a baby soon, because if I wait too long it'll be too late. Geesh! :mad:

I'm not going to let anyone push me to have a baby. If by the time I'm ready, it's too late for me to have one, then I'll adopt.
 
minnow

minnow

Well-known member
There is nothing wrong with being a virgin, in fact it is desireable. A lot of people I know myself included wish that they could go back, and make wiser choices about who their first lover was and they wish they had waited. Do not let anyone pressure you to give up that gift. You are in control. You decide. If you keep that in mind it will make the first time all that more special.:)
 
L

Littlewilly

Well-known member
Truthseeker said:
Yesterday my dad paid a visit to his friend. This man blunty asked my father what's wrong with me and why I'm not in a relationship. He also told him that he was pretty sure that I'm a virgin, and that other people should "persuade" me to show interest in women. He also implied that I should visit a prostitute as soon as possible.

When my father told this I was like "so what if I'm a virgin, does this make me a totally worthless human being or what?" I didn't say this to my father but it crossed my mind. If this guy (my father's friend) is so compassionate and humane, why doesn't he donate money to the poor, why doesn't he help people in need? There are millions of people who are being slaughtered in wars, millions who are dying from starvation or suffering from terrible diseases and so on. It seems not having sex is considered to be the worst thing that can possibly happen to a human being.
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Watta twollop ay.
Ur father's friend has kno business poking his nose wheres it don't belong.
4all we kno he mite ov b a virgin or how many times has he had sex in his probably mis4gotten life.
 
T

Truthseeker

Active member
Why does it bother other people so much that I don't have sex? Are they for real, don't they have other things to worry about in life?
 
Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
Truthseeker said:
Why does it bother other people so much that I don't have sex? Are they for real, don't they have other things to worry about in life?
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I think for some people they just don't understand because it is a big deal for them.

Others may worry it is a symptom of other things and that you are unhappy because of it.
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
Well that guy was pretty pathetic and immature to comment in such a way! What is it to do with anyone else anyway! And what's wrong with being a virgin?...It's not some disease or anything!
 
redski

redski

1
Your fathers friends sounds like an ignorant moron.
However, in his way, maybe he was just trying to help.
 
X

xxaimsxx

Well-known member
Yeah some people are smutty like that. How charming him insisting you go see a prostitute immediately?!
I would of told him where to go.
Ive always wondered whats the obsession with people thinking if your a virgin your not as good as everyone else :S.
 
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