Beginning of relaxation attempt

[OceanMist]

That girl sure sounds 'unsupportive' (to say the least!!) - maybe she had a crush on you and was disappointed when you didn't 'hit on her'??
There are some very goodlooking priests and such too, would she consider them a 'waste' too?? huh?? (some people can be just 'rude' or 'silly' hm??)
Lots of other great-looking single people out there too!!
Maybe find a way to reply something witty, eg, 'Well (insert famous fashion designer/painter/...) doesn't think so?' or 'So you think you girls are worthy of my beauty?' (and grin)
It's actually good news what she said - apparently she thinks you look good??

Are you talking to me? I'm kind of lost.

If you are talking about the woman who dumped me practically after the first night we met, that woman wanted nothing to do with me afterwards.

As for the priest thing, she would get with that priest if he was socially confident and good in bed. It wasn't just about the experience thing, it was that I was literally bad in bed, and I'm not exaggerating that. The really weird thing about it was she wasn't that great either.

She was overweight so decided that she could just lie there over half the time and make me do all the work. For her to switch positions took forever. It was like trying to move a whale.

I was actually relieved once I recovered from the rejection from her. I hated looking at her face, she wasn't attractive. Part of the reason I was bad in bed was because I wasn't attracted to her.

At least nothing bad happened, I went down without an argument. I just accepted her rejection, asked why, and then moved on. I wish she wasn't so shallow but some women are like that, as so are some men so yeah.

She didn't even want to talk to me anymore so her rejection with me is probably going to be our last conversation. It was amazing how her attitude and tone changed after we met that night. It was like all the sudden she hated me. I was nice to her, so I don't quite get where the hostility came from. At least she told the truth, I guess, even the truth was she wants some sex freak. Maybe she needs to wake up to reality and realize not every guy is Usher.

 

[theslowesthand]

Muscle tension can be related to stress and nutrition too

Agreed .. but it seems that OceanMist has some really major bodily tension going on? If this is so, then i suspect some other things might be at the root of it - toxins (incl in food, work & home), allergies, posture.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

I'm not sure if this will help, but I have trouble with full time jobs as well so having two part time jobs could make a difference. This is so you're not always at the same place and around the same people if you happen to not like who you work with. This increases the chance you might like one job more than the other and who knows you might rather switch to full time in the future.

 

[OceanMist]

Agreed .. but it seems that OceanMist has some really major bodily tension going on? If this is so, then i suspect some other things might be at the root of it - toxins (incl in food, work & home), allergies, posture.

You are right about the major bodily tension. Even if I fix that toxin and food stuff, I'll still have a problem. My muscle tension will be there unless I learn to teach my muscles to relax by command. I could be be the healthiest guy in the world with what I do with my body, but I'd still be tense because my body is automatically this way.

I think I mentioned before, this is all genetic. It wasn't a choice. I wouldn't be surprised if I was tense inside my mom's womb as a fetus. That may sound funny, but it's probably true.

What I have is rare (severe muscle tension all the time). I spoke with counselors about it, and one who had experience dealing with hundreds of people with anxiety issues, and she told me she'd never seen somebody who had as bad of muscle tension as me.

The positive thing is that I'm still capable of conversing with people back and forth and can still leave my house to do some stuff like work and get food.

My muscle tension is so bad that you can hear it in my voice, and yes, you can see it in my body posture. This is a monster problem.

I've been practicing relaxing and haven't had much success. The quest continues.

 

[sullyS25]

Meditation really helps me. I can almost foresee the response by most people saying they do not know how to meditate either....I used to say that myself. Once I finally did some reading and realized there is no one specific way to do it. It isn't about forcing yourself to relax or not think. For me it is merely just observing what you are thinking and FEELING on a physical level without judging and accepting it completely. With that acceptance has came very deep relaxation and peace of mind......That is just what I do though....

When I "force myself to relax" it makes things worse because then I beat myself up when it doesn't work and I get more tense. When I accept that I may be tense, breath deeply and try not to judge it, I become naturally relaxed.....I don't know how but it really works for me.......

 

[OceanMist]

I'm a visual thinker, so I'm using visualization. I did 40 minutes worth today and I relaxed a few times on and off. With me, i'm getting more air in and can feel my face letting go a bit. It's very inconsistent, though.

I figured something out that might work. If you sit up and let your face drop while facing the bed you will feel what it's like to let your face go, which i think is the main relaxation command center. Then, you lie on your back and imagine you are in the previous position.

I just want to say that my body and life are very frustrating. This muscle tension is making my quality of life lower than like 95% of people in the world. To see everyone else walking around more relaxed than me makes me mad that I can't relax. I'm trying to make the best of it, I guess.

I just don't know if this relaxation thing is going to work. It seems like it could be impossible, possibly. You never know, though. I will continue the practice.

 

[OceanMist]

I'm going to start tracking on here because I've been losing track at times. Today's mantra: Drop.

Relaxation sessions: Goal for week: 420 mins

Sunday: 60 minutes