Are you on meds?

[lyricalliaisons]

Having social anxiety called a learned behavior is why I despised my first therapist, because she was always telling me it was learned. I learned it from no one because no one I knew had it, so it was definitely not learned in my case. Everyone's case is different, & for some people, it does run in their families & they did copy it, but for others, like me, it's just an integral part of who they have always been.

 

[Enialis227]

Having social anxiety called a learned behavior is why I despised my first therapist, because she was always telling me it was learned. I learned it from no one because no one I knew had it, so it was definitely not learned in my case. Everyone's case is different, & for some people, it does run in their families & they did copy it, but for others, like me, it's just an integral part of who they have always been.

This is the same for me. Social Phobia was not something I learned, it was something I was born with and that interfered with my life to the point of forcefully changing my personality and behaviour. I have had social phobic problems for literally as long as I can remember, which is why I can't understand the the aversion to medication: if something is controlling and ruining your life, then why would you not try something that could fix it?

 

[lyricalliaisons]

This is the same for me. Social Phobia was not something I learned, it was something I was born with and that interfered with my life to the point of forcefully changing my personality and behaviour. I have had social phobic problems for literally as long as I can remember, which is why I can't understand the the aversion to medication: if something is controlling and ruining your life, then why would you not try something that could fix it?

I completely agree & relate to everything you said.

 

[Remus]

I have had SAD since I was a toddler, I am now 40 and had it all my life, for me I think the trigger was my mother having post natal depression and hitting me when I was little, then being sexually abused at 6 years old made things worse. None of my siblings have SA nor my relatives, so in my case it is not genetic but learned. Also my children are teens now and do not have SAD, I purposely did not show anxiety as they grew up.

I can see cases of people coming from a long line of "shy" ancestors, if this is learned or genetic is still being researched, I just know that in my case it is a learned behaviour.

The meds route for me proved useless, this was over a period of 12 years on and off, I then tried therapies and for me they were extremely benefical. I'm not cured but I am in a much better place than when I was 20 and crashing.

 

[lyricalliaisons]

That's not actually considered a "learned" behavior, that would be more of reactionary behavior as a result of negative environmental experiences, than a learned behavior. A learned behavior, from everything I know & have read about it, is a behavior that is learned by watching others exhibit the same behavior. It's perfectly natural that someone with your background would have anxiety in relation to people, because of your experiences.

For me, I know it's not genetic, because it doesn't run in my family. I'm the only person with it. I didn't have the negative experiences like you & some others with SA did, either, it was just always a part of me. I know it has to be in my brain structure (whatever) because there's no other explanation. I was verbally tortured from about first or second grade on in school, but my SA was present even as a toddler, long before that, even though there were no environmental factors creating it or making it worse. I wasn't beaten or abused in my childhood, & I'm not the only person with SA who wasn't.

Just as there is more than one "cause" for SA, there should be more than one treatment. For some, therapy is useless, for some, meds are useless. For some therapy is the only thing that helps, for some, meds are the only things that help. For some, they need both. Automatically saying that because your SA was caused by environmental factors & helped by therapy, does not mean that everyone's was caused by the same thing, or would benefit in the same way. Some people would do very well on meds. When people read posts on forums like these, it can inform what they do or don't do. So, if someone who has never sought treatment before sees those saying that meds are useless, they might not try meds & might end up forgoing their only chance at getting better. The same goes with therapy. I think that people should try both meds & therapy because you never know what might work for who.


I don't completely agree with this, but it talks more about what I'm trying to say:
http://www.mdjunction.com/panic-attacks/articles/causes-and-risk-factors-of-social-phobia

 

[Remus]

That's not actually considered a "learned" behavior, that would be more of reactionary behavior as a result of negative environmental experiences, than a learned behavior. A learned behavior, from everything I know & have read about it, is a behavior that is learned by watching others exhibit the same behavior. It's perfectly natural that someone with your background would have anxiety in relation to people, because of your experiences.

My mother suffered anxitey and depression with the post natal depression, it pretty much goes hand in hand, thus learned behaviour. The abuse I should think already enhanced a messed up little boy. I got a second opinion about all this off a consultant but he also came to the same conclusion.

 

[Emily_G]

Why does the thought of medication scare y'all so much?

For me, it's potential side effects from allowing chemicals to enter my body everyday for a long period of time.

I was on Yasmin for 6 years, recently saw a commercial that said it can cause heart attack, blood clots, among other things. I was on it for 6 years!!! I won't be getting back on the pill after my child is born....

That and stuttering is part of who I am. I have lived long enough being covert...it's time to accept and love myself.

 

[lyricalliaisons]

My mother suffered anxitey and depression with the post natal depression, it pretty much goes hand in hand, thus learned behaviour. The abuse I should think already enhanced a messed up little boy. After I was diagnosed, I got a second opinion about all this off a consultant but he also came to the same conclusion.

What I was saying is that, even though social anxiety is learned in some people's cases, in other people's cases, it's not. So, to just call social anxiety in general a learned behavior, is wrong because it's not learned for all people. If everyone with it had developed it because of experiences they had while growing up & seeing others suffer with similar things, that would be one thing, but not everyone has those experiences, so to call it a learned behavior is wrong. Unless it's a learned behavior for everyone who has it, it can't be referred to as a learned behavior. In your case & other cases, it can be called learned, but in others', like my own, it can't.

 

[Remus]

Funnily enough two of my best freinds are bi-polar like yourself and they have had SA since childhood and also it was not learned as they had cosy family life. with no kind of disruption or anxiety ridden parents. One of them thinks that it's a bi product of bi polar, maybe there are really two types of social anxiety, one chemical and the other learned?

 

[lurknomore]

For me, I know it's not genetic, because it doesn't run in my family. I'm the only person with it. I didn't have the negative experiences like you & some others with SA did, either, it was just always a part of me. I know it has to be in my brain structure (whatever) because there's no other explanation. I was verbally tortured from about first or second grade on in school, but my SA was present even as a toddler, long before that, even though there were no environmental factors creating it or making it worse. I wasn't beaten or abused in my childhood, & I'm not the only person with SA who wasn't.

Just as there is more than one "cause" for SA, there should be more than one treatment. For some, therapy is useless, for some, meds are useless. For some therapy is the only thing that helps, for some, meds are the only things that help. For some, they need both. Automatically saying that because your SA was caused by environmental factors & helped by therapy, does not mean that everyone's was caused by the same thing, or would benefit in the same way. Some people would do very well on meds. When people read posts on forums like these, it can inform what they do or don't do. So, if someone who has never sought treatment before sees those saying that meds are useless, they might not try meds & might end up forgoing their only chance at getting better. The same goes with therapy. I think that people should try both meds & therapy because you never know what might work for who.

I was going to write a long response, but I think you summed up most of what I was going to say. Like you, I'm the only one in my family with SA, so it certainly wasn't learned... but I also never had any negative experiences that I can remember- I was never tortured or abused mentally or physically. Even though no one in my family has it, it could still have some genetic roots- a recessive thing that rarely gets expressed or something along those lines.

Either way, I don't see where the genetic versus learned argument matters that much when it comes to medications. Even a learned behavior can be so deeply rooted that medications may be the only way to get you into the right mood or frame of mind to be helped by other means like therapy or counseling.

Personally, I think that for me SA doesn't have to be a "life sentence" regardless of what the cause is. I think mine is mild enough that I likely do not need medications, but even if I did use them, I see them more as a temporary helper than a "cure." I don't think that I would need (or even want) to use them for the rest of my life as a "crutch."

 

[lyricalliaisons]

To Remus:
Mine's totally unconnected to bipolar, even my psychiatrist finally figured that out, which is why he finally put me on an anti-anxiety med. When it's bipolar-related it comes & goes (according to my psychiatrist & everything I've read). When a person is manic, they're apparently SA free & when they're depressed, they're completely anxious. For me, that's not the case at all because, even when my depression was completely gone for over a year after starting meds, I was just as anxious & scared of being around people as always. I don't think there's two different types of SA, I think it's just different for all people. That's why some people suddenly develop it out of nowhere & then it suddenly goes away, whereas some people have it throughout their whole lives. Plus, I know two people who both had good childhoods & have both had SA their whole lives & neither are bipolar. I'm not even sure if my diagnosis of bipolar is correct, truthfully.

 

[lyricalliaisons]

I was going to write a long response, but I think you summed up most of what I was going to say. Like you, I'm the only one in my family with SA, so it certainly wasn't learned... but I also never had any negative experiences that I can remember- I was never tortured or abused mentally or physically. Even though no one in my family has it, it could still have some genetic roots- a recessive thing that rarely gets expressed or something along those lines.

Either way, I don't see where the genetic versus learned argument matters that much when it comes to medications. Even a learned behavior can be so deeply rooted that medications may be the only way to get you into the right mood or frame of mind to be helped by other means like therapy or counseling.

Personally, I think that for me SA doesn't have to be a "life sentence" regardless of what the cause is. I think mine is mild enough that I likely do not need medications, but even if I did use them, I see them more as a temporary helper than a "cure." I don't think that I would need (or even want) to use them for the rest of my life as a "crutch."

I never thought about it being a recessive trait hidden in the genes, but that could be what my case is. For me, I hope I don't need meds forever, but right now I do. For me, they're not a crutch, but something I truly need to function. My SA is severe to the point of agoraphobia & for those like me, medication may be the only hope, even if it is something they have to take for life. Although I certainly don't like the thought lol. I'm still hoping therapy might help in the future, but so far, none of it has.

 

[mrb]

same as me lurk im the only one with sa in my family , as you mine is mild , again as you if i did need meds it would be a temp thing not a crutch for the rest of my life .... i wasnt beaten abused .. dont get me wrong i didnt have a happy childhood , but im not gonna go into all that ,all past tence ... but i did have a lot of bad experiences .. again not going into all that .. my mother died years ago and she wouldnt even go into a shop .. she always sent someone else to do it .. but then having said that she managed for years b4 having us kids , all 6 of us .. so maybe something happend in her life , i know my old man used to beat her up , but never saw any of that ... she was a good looking woman so maybe my old man knocked all her confidence out of her .. all i know was my old man wasnt a very nice person to her , but long term she paid him back , she left him , and that broke him .... what goes around comes around ......

 

[Noca]

I am not. Just bought Piracetam and started taking it, but then I came across some article where someone is saying it caused him brain fog.. so I better stopped. I really don't know if I should take it or not.

Please tell me how it goes if you decide to continue to take it

 

[Noca]

For me, it's potential side effects from allowing chemicals to enter my body everyday for a long period of time.

I was on Yasmin for 6 years, recently saw a commercial that said it can cause heart attack, blood clots, among other things. I was on it for 6 years!!! I won't be getting back on the pill after my child is born....

That and stuttering is part of who I am. I have lived long enough being covert...it's time to accept and love myself.

You just need to choose your meds wisely. If you dont like the chance of serious side effects, then avoid anti-psychotics and stick to SSRIs.

 

[Emily_G]

You just need to choose your meds wisely. If you dont like the chance of serious side effects, then avoid anti-psychotics and stick to SSRIs.

I'm not a fan of being on any medication, period.

 

[froghat]

I take Paxil and xanax as needed. They don't work miracles, but without them I would be unemployed and afraid to leave the house.

 

[Enialis227]

For me, it's potential side effects from allowing chemicals to enter my body everyday for a long period of time.

I was on Yasmin for 6 years, recently saw a commercial that said it can cause heart attack, blood clots, among other things. I was on it for 6 years!!! I won't be getting back on the pill after my child is born....

That and stuttering is part of who I am. I have lived long enough being covert...it's time to accept and love myself.

You can accept and love the you who's on medication as well, regardless of what you take, you're still you.
But if being off of medication makes you more comfortable than being on them, then good, stick with that.

 

[cure]

I'm on 30 mg of Paroxetine but it doesn't seem to help much. I have only been on it for 11 days though.

 

[Emily_G]

You can accept and love the you who's on medication as well, regardless of what you take, you're still you.
But if being off of medication makes you more comfortable than being on them, then good, stick with that.

Yes, but I'd still feel like I'm trying to hide the problem. I did that, very successfully, until I was about 19...and I hated every minute of it. IDK, just how I am I guess.