stupidmunky
New member
Does anyone know a good thing to say to start a conversation?
plz help
plz help
A good thing to say to bvreak the ice...
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dan246
Well-known member
Since I came to school I've kind of developed a routine. If it's someone I've never met before I start by asking their name. Also ask where they are from. I usually ask what program they are doing and how their classes are going. Then once I know what classes they are taking (they usually name a couple) I ask more about that. Depending on where I am meeting them I ask where they go to school or work and what they do for a job or what they study. Once a conversation is going there are two things that could happen. The first is they only give one word answers and seem completely uninterested. This is when I'm lost. I try to tell myself that it's because they are preoccupied, nervous, or are in a bad mood. I usually end up thinking that I'm just boring and are asking stupid questions. The second thing that could happen is they could actually give you a detailed response. I always make sure to listen closely so I can ask more questions or put in my own two cents on the subject. My biggest problem is talking to these people a second time. I use up all of my good questions the first time so I find it really hard to think of something to say. This has been my biggest challenge. I've found that starting and holding conversations is a skill that needs to be practiced. You quickly learn which questions are good and you get better at judging people's interest levels. It always helps to come off as being extra nice. It seems when I try to play it cool and pretend like I'm relaxed and comfortable, I come off as being boring or even kind of mean. It's good to try and be as friendly as possible. Once a good conversation gets going it really feels nice to be able to act normal and just be yourself. Anyway, I don't know if that helped but it's worked for me.
Reading back on that I guess I didn't really answer your question directly. If I've seen the person around I usually say: "Hey what's up. I think I've seen you around before. What's your name?" or something along those lines. It I'm just meeting them for the first time I say: "How's it going? What's your name?". And if I've talked to them before it's easy to say "Hey. How have you been lately?". Reading those they sound really stupid, but the important thing is to act somewhat relaxed. Not like you are reading off a piece of paper. One more thing, I find conversations get boring if you just drill the person with questions the whole time. It's good to make lengthy comments and have them respond without asking them a question. And try to think of opened-ended questions, not just yes or no ones. Whew, that was a long one. Hope I helped.
Reading back on that I guess I didn't really answer your question directly. If I've seen the person around I usually say: "Hey what's up. I think I've seen you around before. What's your name?" or something along those lines. It I'm just meeting them for the first time I say: "How's it going? What's your name?". And if I've talked to them before it's easy to say "Hey. How have you been lately?". Reading those they sound really stupid, but the important thing is to act somewhat relaxed. Not like you are reading off a piece of paper. One more thing, I find conversations get boring if you just drill the person with questions the whole time. It's good to make lengthy comments and have them respond without asking them a question. And try to think of opened-ended questions, not just yes or no ones. Whew, that was a long one. Hope I helped.
Fredscars
Well-known member
mm, i find it really hard to make new friends.
i can small talk - but only with people im already mates with, useful huh.
i cannot go up to somebody and ask them a question, or even say hello. At pressure i might smile at them in the corridor, but thats unlikely.
If you can then youre doing better than me :lol: My sp isnt bad, but thats the one thing i cannot do.
i never know what to ask its just.."err...uh...y..you ok?"
and if someone asks me when ive never met them before i give nothing but one word answers lol. usually for a a few weeks, or a month depending on the person.
But according to my mates if the person you want to talk to is wearing some cool clothes go up and say somehting like "sorry to disturb you, but youre clothes are really cool and i was wondering whee you got them from" cos compliments are always a good way to break the ice.
another good one is if theyre wearing a band t-shirt that you like, htats the best apparently. Gives you an instant topic.
i can small talk - but only with people im already mates with, useful huh.
i cannot go up to somebody and ask them a question, or even say hello. At pressure i might smile at them in the corridor, but thats unlikely.
If you can then youre doing better than me :lol: My sp isnt bad, but thats the one thing i cannot do.
i never know what to ask its just.."err...uh...y..you ok?"
and if someone asks me when ive never met them before i give nothing but one word answers lol. usually for a a few weeks, or a month depending on the person.
But according to my mates if the person you want to talk to is wearing some cool clothes go up and say somehting like "sorry to disturb you, but youre clothes are really cool and i was wondering whee you got them from" cos compliments are always a good way to break the ice.
another good one is if theyre wearing a band t-shirt that you like, htats the best apparently. Gives you an instant topic.
LilMissTragic
Well-known member
Hello
Hows it going
Been up to anything interesting?
Thats my usual lines. Just remember, most people like to talk aboput themselves a lot so just ask them about thier day, job etc.
Hows it going
Been up to anything interesting?
Thats my usual lines. Just remember, most people like to talk aboput themselves a lot so just ask them about thier day, job etc.
WorldEndsWithMe
Well-known member
Personally I've always been a fan of, What's cooking good looking?
On a serious note... It's always easier if you have some common ground to start off on. Like a class together, or a similar interest so then you can talk about that. If you have no idea who they are, normally just smiling and saying hi, how are you, can work just fine. If you hesitate or get shy it can bust. You have to act almost as if you've been talking to this person your whole life.
Well... that's just my personal experience. I don't normally approach people, I'm an approachee, not an approacher, but this is kind of how my friends acted with me when we met.
On a serious note... It's always easier if you have some common ground to start off on. Like a class together, or a similar interest so then you can talk about that. If you have no idea who they are, normally just smiling and saying hi, how are you, can work just fine. If you hesitate or get shy it can bust. You have to act almost as if you've been talking to this person your whole life.
Well... that's just my personal experience. I don't normally approach people, I'm an approachee, not an approacher, but this is kind of how my friends acted with me when we met.
