My girlfriend is being reclusive.

Geo

Geo

Well-known member
We've been together since September and we know everything about each other. She is nothing like the stereotypical girl and she wants to be a guy. She spends most of her time on the internet. She doesn't have SA at all, she can converse very well, is hugely funny and has lots of friends online and off but she says she is pretty mentally instable.

Since the past month she hasn't been texting me much and we've only hung out once. She just prefers to spend all her time on the internet. It depresses me because I love her to death and I wanna spend more time with her but she just won't. I'm kinda bummed as to what to do now.
 
BlueDays

BlueDays

1
Geo said:
We've been together since September and we know everything about each other. She is nothing like the stereotypical girl and she wants to be a guy. She spends most of her time on the internet. She doesn't have SA at all, she can converse very well, is hugely funny and has lots of friends online and off but she says she is pretty mentally instable.

Since the past month she hasn't been texting me much and we've only hung out once. She just prefers to spend all her time on the internet. It depresses me because I love her to death and I wanna spend more time with her but she just won't. I'm kinda bummed as to what to do now.
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Have you asked her why she spends so much time on the internet? There has to be a reason.
 
dottie

dottie

Well-known member
so, it seems you have two very different priorities. yours: spending time with her. hers: not spending time with you. dump her.
 
2

21NZ

Well-known member
dottie said:
so, it seems you have two very different priorities. yours: spending time with her. hers: not spending time with you. dump her.
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Wow ?


Why don't you just ask her? or try and spend time with her online? idk... sorta like a lan party, haha

Have you asked her around to your house?
 
Geo

Geo

Well-known member
BlueDays said:
Have you asked her why she spends so much time on the internet? There has to be a reason.
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She just blames it on utter laziness. That's her reason.

And I already in fact tried to dump her last month cause she was doing the same thing. But she got really emotional and cried, saying she loves me more than anything, wanted it to last forever and that she would choose me over the internet and everything else she can't live without. I love her just the same.

That's why I don't understand why she's doing this.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
WX206A-hand-cable-cutter.jpg
 
R

Razzlecherry

Banned
Maybe there's something going on that you're unaware of? She told you that she's mentally unstable, so maybe she's trying to hint at it. Maybe she's drained and can't be bothered to do anything other than hang on the web.

You two seem to really care about each other, so try to figure out what's up.
 
BlueDays

BlueDays

1
Geo said:
She just blames it on utter laziness. That's her reason.

And I already in fact tried to dump her last month cause she was doing the same thing. But she got really emotional and cried, saying she loves me more than anything, wanted it to last forever and that she would choose me over the internet and everything else she can't live without. I love her just the same.

That's why I don't understand why she's doing this.
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^So she wants to have her cake and eat it too, by the sounds of things.


coyote said:
WX206A-hand-cable-cutter.jpg
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^ lol :bigsmile:
 
Lamb

Lamb

Well-known member
Geo said:
We've been together since September and we know everything about each other. She is nothing like the stereotypical girl and she wants to be a guy. She spends most of her time on the internet. She doesn't have SA at all, she can converse very well, is hugely funny and has lots of friends online and off but she says she is pretty mentally instable.

Since the past month she hasn't been texting me much and we've only hung out once. She just prefers to spend all her time on the internet. It depresses me because I love her to death and I wanna spend more time with her but she just won't. I'm kinda bummed as to what to do now.
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Just curious, you mention she wishes to be male- do you know where that desire stems from?


I think you should attempt one last time to have a heart to heart with her. Express how hurtful her actions are and that if you two can't make some sort of compromise towards working on changing this- you're finished with her. It's been a month, does she attempt to even call you?
 
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coyote

coyote

Well-known member
Geo said:
Pssh nice metaphor. I do realize I'm being pretty stubborn but that's just what I get for being young, naive, and too kind for my own good.
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naw, man, you can use wire cutters to cut off her internet service

then she's all yours :thumbup:
 
anomicdeer

anomicdeer

Well-known member
Okay since you already ask why, tell her you don't like it. If she still acts the same I would think that she isn't into you anymore. I have no clue though. Apparently I'm always wrong (says the one I'm leaving).
 
Geo

Geo

Well-known member
coyote said:
naw, man, you can use wire cutters to cut off her internet service

then she's all yours :thumbup:
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Ohh I interpreted it as cutting off the relationship haha.

She's just secretive too. She doesn't talk about her problems much and just bottles it up, even I can't get a word out of her.
 
Geo

Geo

Well-known member
I was able to get the truth out of her. Apparently she has been afraid and paranoid ever since I tried to dump her last month. She uses the internet as a form of escaping from reality and really doesn't want me to leave her. That's what sent her mind into the void.

I feel like a failure as a boyfriend and don't deserve a loving girl like her..
 
Remus

Remus

Moderator
Staff member
Geo said:
I was able to get the truth out of her. Apparently she has been afraid and paranoid ever since I tried to dump her last month. She uses the internet as a form of escaping from reality and really doesn't want me to leave her. That's what sent her mind into the void.

I feel like a failure as a boyfriend and don't deserve a loving girl like her..
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Keep talking to her mate, support goes both ways. Try get her out and do fun things together, be careful not to pressure to much. :thumbup:
 
Geo

Geo

Well-known member
dottie said:
this isn't a relationship, let alone "love."
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I don't mean to sound like an ass but this pissed me off. You better not be comparing us to some old relationship-hoppers?

We just had a falling out and I'm glad it's dealt with.
 
dottie

dottie

Well-known member
ignoring you to play on the internet and not being assed to even communicate hardly seems "loving." maybe that is not what you want to hear but it is my opinion.
 
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